Child Support?

Question

Do you think it's right for dads who don't spend time with their kids, don't provide for their children, don't really give a crap either way what what happens to their offspring, to complain about having to pay child support (which if the Mother has a decent job is inadequate anyhow)?

Please note:

Before everyone gets their panties in a bunch I'm not talking about all dads.... just the ones I described above.

I'd like to hear all sides of this story ---- what do you think?

By the way ---- I'm not condoning men who stop seeing their children or stop supporting them.

I'm talking about selfish men who don't take care of their end of what should be (regardless of who has physical custody along with reasonable visitation for the other party) at least a 50/50 split

Answer 1

whether or not we think it is right or wrong here in Canada it is the law that they pay a % of their pay checks. That is the least that they can do. I think that if they are not in there child's life through their own ignorance then they should have to pay more, if they are not in there child's life because of the mother then they should pay less. It is hard on both sides both for the mother and the father but it is the hardest on the child in question.

Answer 2

If they were forced in to the "described type" by the horrible court system, excessive support, excessive restrictions, archaic custody system etc, etc then they are a "beat down dad". Then Yes they have every right to complain. This happens way more then people like to admit, the guys starts out "good" but is very unfairly pummeled turns bitter and the real losers end up being children.

However if they were that way from the start then, NO, they no right to complain.

statistically women are far worse at paying support then men

Answer 3

No they do not, were they complaining when the child was made, I highly doubt it! Even if the woman has a decent job, there many things that involve raising a healthy, happy child and the hardest part does not involve money at all! i.e. potty training, yes the equipment costs money, but the time, patience, does not. The house costs money, but love , nurturing, cleaning messes, teaching to read, teaching to write, teaching to count, being the nurse, being the doctor, and everything else being a Mother requires cancels out anything the lazy jerk could ever complain about!

Answer 4

Men and women need to have these conversations before they do the deed. These questions should be asked:
1. If we use protection and it fails are you willing to have an abortion or put the baby up for adoption? (btw, i don't agree with abortion, but i also don't agree with premarital sex)
2. If I tell you now that if you get pregnant i will see to it that you never get a dime from me even if i have to go underground for the rest of my life would you still sleep with me?
After you get the answers get it writing. This is a start to what men and women can do to change the laws, because this is what's happening. Women get pregnant and think they are going to keep the man but sadly the man leaves because he didn't love you, he only wanted to get .... and he certainly doesn't want to have a child with you. Like you said not all men. I think men pay too much in child support. Women who are stay at home moms can be because her HUSBAND works to support that family. Single moms are not, nor should they be, afforded the luxury. The man and woman were not married he is not obligated in any way to support her. The whole system needs revamping.
I've seen too many men pay the support but be denied holidays or trips or whatever just because the woman wants to use her power and authority.
Most women are heartless on this subject my advice to men is to keep it in their pants until they are ready for kids. It's a hot button issue tonight.
I'm a female by the way.

Answer 5

I don't think they have a right to complain. They have a right to do the right thing but they usually end up just trying to avoid paying all together, even if they had been a decent father and provider before the divorce, break up etc...

My ex husband just dropped off the face of the earth for three years then child support caught up with him (I had to apply for assistance for food stamps/medical no $$ for about four months I had a job but just went through a tough time at first.) all of a sudden he wanted to play dad again.

I had never actually even tried to get him to pay child support but because I was on assistance for that "very short" time... you betcha, uncle sam wanted that money back so they pressed the issue. It is going on thirteen years and he has managed to avoid, dodge, and hide to keep from paying the child support currently $55,000.00 behind (yeah I meant to put all those zero's).

Uncle Sam threatened him with jail time and the loss of his driver's license if he didn't pay. They garnished his wages, he paid a little, changed jobs, they found him about eight months later, garnished his wages and took his tax return ( to pay back Uncle Sam) by this time the government had their $ back, so when he ducked out again he was basically off the hook, unless I could afford a private attorney to enforce him to pay (yeah right).

So he still works, has a license, a house with a bathroom as big as my kid's room, and drives a bad *** truck all customed out.
But guess what? He don't support them(although I let him see them and spend vacations with him).

Ps He even tried to get me to terminate his parental rights or adopt them out to my boyfriend so he wouldn't have to pay!!!

Answer 6

Most men complain about paying anyway. Its amazing how some men are to their children! They should at least visit! But then again sometimes a child is better of without dad!

Answer 7

NO! They have no right to complain about child support, even the fathers that ARE involved with their kids. If they were still in the relationship and living with the baby and mama they would be paying ALL their money to expences. But see then they are still getting laid and deal with it. Bastards. My father paid child support for 18 years with out ever bitching and after my sister turned 18 and her mother let her talk to him, she came and visited.

Answer 8

You got a good point there ! I mean that in a nice way because I've heard of more cases like this one before, it sucks because the children get dragged in the middle of this game between mom and dads fighting all the time, and in your case it's not uncommon for you to feel this way, I've been in a situation kinda like yours to where the kids resent the fact they even belong to you and they side with their mom no matter what you have to say to them and don't want to come over when you do have visitation rights, but yet the mom makes more money than you because in my case I helped support her while she went to college to get where she is now, It was our choice back then and I got screwed because she wanted more than what I had to offer her when she became a professional buisness women. she started liking her boss and she started downing me for not being more like him, I make good money too but it wasn't enough she wanted it all. and brother I do mean it all too. I don't see my children because she turned them against me, I stoped all the giving to them, because I feel like they owe me more than what I was given when I left them, it's a bunch of crap, they don't need my money because there's more there then what I'm worth after leaving them, so they don't feel like they need me around anymore which is fine with me. it's kinda nice in a small way because they can all kiss my a hole in one where the sun don't shine...

Answer 9

well thats a big can of worms...lol
no of course it isnt right....
my father didnt pay my mother child support in fact he has worked under the table and didnt get a valid drivers license till we were all 18 just so the state couldnt get him... screwed up!

Answer 10

Most fathers complain about paying child support.