Sweety - Call him and tell him you want to talk about it calmly and reasonably. DO NOT apologize unless YOU think its your fault. Use statements like...I feel scared you will not love me as much when we have these arguments. Do not use any blaming terms such as you did this, you did that. Do not go back to old issues from previous disagreements. If things get hot...take a break...it really does help. This is about learning to communicate and if a relationship is to last its an imperative. GBYou
2006-12-02 12:05:47
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answer #1
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answered by Dust in the Wind 7
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First, try to see the situation from his point-of-view. Why does he think it's all your fault and explore those reasons. You may find that he has reason. But, you also may find that he can't see any wrong that he did but you won't be able to see this unless you try to remove yourself as you objectively analyze the situation.
If he believes he did absolutely no wrong and you did all the wrong and you see from his point-of-view and believe he is incorrect, then he is manipulating and abusing you.
If you see from his point-of-view that he is correct, then you should talk this over with him and perhaps apologize if that's what you want to do.
But if this is a matter of him not accepting responsibility with the problem, then you have bigger problems that may never go away. Talk with him about what happened and your feelings and see his reactions from his point-of-view -- are they manipulative or does he truly have a good reason to hold them? But be prepared to make a change in your life if he isn't prepared to accept responsibility instead of trying to change him. But give him time if this is the first time it has happened to you. If his behavior doesn't change and it happens again, I'm afraid it will never change and you'll need to make a bigger decision, whether that's staying with him to try to change him or letting him go.
2006-12-02 20:10:58
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answer #2
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answered by i8pikachu 5
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If it is your fault, by all means apologise for it. If it is not, let him cool down a little and reason it out with him.
If he cannot withstand reasoning, and is arguing for the sake of winning, consider to dump him. Such a boyfriend is not worth a single penny - you can find plenty at the rubbishdump.
2006-12-02 20:01:51
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answer #3
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answered by JP E 4
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Call him and talk to him. Tell him that the fight is not really worth it, and you guys are only wasting time by doing so. Tell him that it's part of the past and if he loves you he should forget about it no matter who is to blame for.
2006-12-02 19:59:50
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answer #4
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answered by RousseSantini 2
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It's hard to say without any other details, but why don't you call him and say you're sorry that you guys are arguing, and you're sorry that he's upset, but that you don't think it's entirely your fault because of XYZ (give your reasons).
Either that, or wait a while and see if it blows over.
2006-12-02 19:59:44
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answer #5
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answered by mikah_smiles 7
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Amber, let's say it's half your fault and half his. Be willing to defend or compromise your half, then see where he stands.Your going to find out if, indeed, you have a boyfriend.
2006-12-02 20:03:13
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answer #6
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answered by Anonymous
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Admit that it is all your fault or tell him to go to hell and spend next Saturday night eating hot bread and butter and Coca Cola like me and on Yahoo Answers alone.
2006-12-02 20:00:05
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answer #7
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answered by Anonymous
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if u love him keep him if he is a jerk dump him or slowly go away from him and when he asks to go back together say no cause if it he is blaming u 4 evreything he is a jerk so u choose
good luck
2006-12-02 20:00:31
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answer #8
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answered by Jessica 1
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How about appologize if you know it's really your fault. Or talk it out with him and tell him what you're thinking.
2006-12-02 19:58:40
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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well is it? If it is apologize and correct the problem. not really sure what else to tell you but being with someone else means you both have to compromise.
2006-12-02 20:00:21
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answer #10
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answered by meaty_okra 3
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