ok so i was going out with this really cool guy we had been dating for a while but one night he told me he loved me it was really sweet and all but i didnt love him back... not wanting to hurt him i wispered "i love you too".... is that wrong??
2006-12-02 11:03:47 · 41 answers · asked by FoxCraftCreations 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
thank you guys for being so honest....its almost brutal lol. but i think i'll tell him the truth asap to prevent any more false hope
2006-12-02 11:15:46 · update #1
You could get out of it without too much pain if you let the guy know (sooner rather than later) that you think you rushed into something you don't think you're ready for yet. He'll be hurt but at least you won't both be in something that you don't want to be in.
2006-12-02 11:06:41 · answer #1 · answered by hobbes84k 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes!!! Why put yourself in that position?? Now you have said something you didn't feel, and in a way in some relationships(or with some people)saying I love you almost puts you into a type of 'obligation'. Now how do you deal with this person everytime you see him? Eventually you will start to resent this person because your frustrations have built up inside of you about not being honest in the first place. Honesty is the best policy in any relationship. Sometimes I believe some people say I love you --waiting and expecting to hear those words from the person they said it to...If one really truly loves another, and they say so, they don't expect or need to hear it back(although it is nice)because love is not demanding,and has no expectations, it is giving and pure. I understand you didn't want to hurt this person so you said it back, but now what? You don't love this person, the truth will eventually hurt more when it comes out. I have never found a very comfortable way of answering that statement...when someone tells you 'I love You' and you just really like them..... but the truth(kindly put) is much better than digging yourself into a big hole.
2006-12-02 11:24:59 · answer #2 · answered by bossfemale 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's tough. unfortunately the "L" word almost is like an invisible lock, "locking" you into a relationship.
Of course it made him feel better, hearing it back from you.
If you are lucky, he might also feel like he was a bit premature, and it may not come up again for awhile.
Otherwise, I would just either admit your error in judgement by saying it too soon,
or
Blow him off/ change the subject next time it comes up
or
Just say it, even though you know it isn't true.
If the relationship continues, you may fall in love with him. If it ends, well, you really loose nothing.
Dont beat yourself up about it. :)
2006-12-02 11:10:56 · answer #3 · answered by slightlyunsettled 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are your feelings for this person even going in that direction? People shouldn't tell someone they love them just to hear back. You can always tell those people because the express "I love you" as a question then pause for your reply. I question weather the first person really does love the other person or just needs to hear someone say it to them, to justify their self worth to themselves. I understand you didn’t want to hurt the person but don’t you think it would hurt more to find out later that it was lie?
2006-12-02 11:30:56 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
no yet whilst i replaced into youthful i presumed i replaced into in love with an ex and as i've got been given older and met somebody new i realised what love quite is. lol .. basically happens i assume Love is the terrific feeling in the worldwide however the worst too motives human beings could lie approximately love a million. to get somebody into mattress 2. feels like they could or theyll lose the different person
2016-10-17 15:12:51 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it's wrong to lie, you know better...I think you love him "as a friend" and you need to tell him that. Otherwise, you toying with his emotions and things could get pretty ugly. Fess up and tell him the truth... the truth will set you free! Keep it real, girlfriend.
2006-12-02 11:09:26 · answer #6 · answered by motherkc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lots of people do that! but dat really doesn't make it right either! just don't tell him the truth about you lying, but never lie again about stuff like dat! when he says it, just smile at him and don't say anything, if you feel the urge to say something, say "i know" or "thanks", but never "i love you too". as from henceforth, quit lying!
and you're not a bad person, so don't feel guilty! you cared for him, and didn't want to hurt his feelings, that's why you did what you did! but remember - two wrongs don't make a right!
p.s. just curious - if you don't love him, why on earth are you with him? sleep on this one will you!
2006-12-02 11:10:31 · answer #7 · answered by Bubbles 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What do you think? If you dug someone and told them you loved them...and they replied in kind, how would you feel to learn later that they only said it to spare your feelings?
it's a horrid thing to do...you may have spared him some discomfort at that moment, but caused a bigger hurt with your lie (when it comes out).
You could've simply smiled and said "thank you"...lying is not the answer...how you've got a situation you've got to fix...
Was it worth it?
2006-12-02 11:07:10 · answer #8 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, it`s wrong. If you date someone and tell them that you love him but really don`t, and then break up with him because you really didn`t love him, it`s going to hurt more than if you had just said, "I`m not ready to say it back." It`s hard to tell someone you don`t love them yet, but it would hurt more if they found out you didn`t mean it.
2006-12-02 11:07:49 · answer #9 · answered by SRAWRRR 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes of course its wrong! I've been lied to before and it makes us guys feel like crap. I rather have someone tell me no than to be lied to. You should really straighten that out asap. Good luck
2006-12-02 11:06:36 · answer #10 · answered by Jorge M 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋