I am an Asian guy in America (born and raised here) and the janitor who works in my office is black. I can never understand why he gets the attention of white and Hispanic women all the time and those same women seem to avoid me like I am the plague or something. Yesterday I engaged in a contest with that black janitor. We went downtown and said in a matter of 2 hours, we will walk the streets and hit up on all the white and Latina women we find attractive and see who gets the most phone numbers. I got none and across the street I saw him easily talking and chatting with so many women. He ended up getting the numbers of 14 white and Hispanic girls numbers in 2 hours; i got none. I don't know what went wrong with me? In my high school years during the late 1980s, black men were not seen as desirable. But, after the hip hop revolution in the 1990s, they seem to be first preference alpha males. I blame my dating woes on my race. What else can i blame it on? It is not fair. Why?
2006-12-02 08:46:05 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
It is not race, it is your willingness to blame it on race that may be the problem. I have known many very charming and attractive Asian guys, black guys, white guys, and Hispanic guys. If you have that illusive thing called "charisma" race is not an issue at all.
The disheartening thing is that charisma is difficult to develop. It is from an inner confidence (and ? some unknown factors?) that are difficult to define, a mixture of self-awareness, kindness, humility and confidence all rolled into one.
My advice is to set a goal of becoming very skilled or expert in one subject. You will have confidence in that one subject, and can converse freely and confidently in that field. Without realizing it, this confidence will spill into other areas of your life. The more time you spend looking for why you are unsuccessful, the less time you have for improving yourself.
There is nothing wrong with you or your race, other than you have bought into the current culture's stereotypes. Blaze your own trail, and you will find you have no trouble.
2006-12-02 08:53:26 · answer #1 · answered by finaldx 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't try to blame it on the brother. Maybe women don't find you attractive. Maybe you don't have game like the brother does. It has nothing to to w/the hip hop revolution. Why don't you place the blame on yourself instead of trying to find someone else to blame.
2006-12-02 16:51:29 · answer #2 · answered by TRULEY MADLY DEEPLEY 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What makes you think that race has anything to do with it? You could look like a mutant, and the other guy like a black Adonis. Or maybe they just aren't into you.
2006-12-02 22:22:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You did it his way, that's why. The "street" way.
You do yours the "high"way!
Next time you as the Asian guy, go to any EXCLUSIVE place, ANY, as long at its exclusive and do the same thing!
Dress smart, look smart, and the results will be EXCLUSIVELY yours!!!
2006-12-02 16:57:13 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋