My girlfriend and I would like to spend Christmas on our own, just the two of us.?

Question

for the past 6 years we've done the family thing, we would like a bit of time for just the two of us but we've got mums to think about. Our siblings are tw*ts who do whatever they like at Christmas but I dont want my mum to be on her own or my girlfriends mum to feel left out.
Any suggestions please?

Answer 1

I recently have encountered this problem myself and I suggest two things...

One: You and your girlfriend make your own traditions. That way even if you two do celebrate with your moms, you will still have something that belongs to the both of you. My boyfriend and I started having what we call Christmas tree dinner. We have our own version of Christmas dinner, with all of our own favorites and put up our tree, just the two of us. We spend the whole night in together celebrating. Just because it isn't the actual day, doesn't mean you can't make it equally special.

Two: Divide up the holiday a little bit better so the two of you have more time alone. Be together Christmas eve and then maybe invite your parents over for brunch the next day. Or start the festivities a little bit earlier, that way you get to see everyone, but there will still be time leftover for the two of you to do your own thing.

I bet you can figure out a way to make everyone happy. It may even be good idea to discuss this with your mom(s) I'm sure she would understand that it is just as important to spend time with each other then it is to be with your family as well. She would probably be less upset spending some of the holiday alone then she would having you be with her when you would rather be doing something else.

And if all else fails, there is always the New Year.
Good Luck!

Answer 2

I know that you and your girlfriend want to spend it together, but the only thing you could and run this past both your mum's is. Why don't you and your girlfriend spend Christmas morning together and then split ie she goes to her mum's and you go to yours. I know that its a hard thing to do, but I remember that is what my other half and I had to do.

Or it might be nice if you both invited your mum's around to your for Christmas as by doing this everyone would be happy, and you could ask each one of your mum's to bring over a dish so that it won't be too stressful on you and your girlfriend. Hopefully both mum's will like this idea, but I would suggest that you put this suggestion to them sooner rather than later, so that they will be able to consider and get used to the idea. Both your mum's will no doubt like the idea because it will give them a break from having to cook the Christmas dinner

Answer 3

Spend Christmas Day or Eve by yourselves and spend the other with the parents. Or spend time with the families before or after the holiday. It is hard to make everyone happy around the holidays and sometimes families can be a bit demanding of your time. You know what you need to have a merry Christmas. If your family doesn't respect that, then they aren't celebrating the spirit of the holiday. It's about giving. And if you need time, they should understand and give it to you. Good luck and be happy this year!

Answer 4

I used to have this problem too. Every Xmas without fail we went to the mother-in-law's and tho I couldn't fault her, it just wasn't the same as having the day on our own with our kids. I'd silently sob myself to sleep wishing we were at home. Then one year we took a deep breath and just said we were spending the day at home on our own. There was no nuclear fallout, the world didn't stop and no-one got upset. It was so easy we should've done it years before. They all understood even tho we'd thought they wouldn't. So just tell them your plans and you might be pleasantly suprised at how well they take it. You can't live your life for other people after all. It's one day in the year and there's always Boxing Day you can spend with them. One last thing, that first Christmas Day on our own was my best Xmas ever. We are no longer together but I'll never forget that first year. So go for it and enjoy yourselves!! x x

Answer 5

I think as long as you make time with your family and your girlfriend's family at some point over the holidays (maybe one on Christmas Eve, the other Boxing Day) then I am sure they will understand.

My fiance and I have done it a couple of times and its really lovely. Well worth doing now while you have no kids (I assume) because when you have them it will become much more difficult - grandparents being what they are.

Answer 6

We ask our kids(all grown up now) to do "exactly" what they want to do and to be honest.

This year is my son and his wife's first christmas and they want to do their own thing on christmas day and thats OK

We have invited them boxing day and the are going to let us know and if they don't want to come over thats OK too

Same "OK" goes for all of the kids and thats OK

When the time comes that we want to spend some time alone at Christmas then that will be OK with them

Be truthfull that you would like to spend time this year together just the two of you. They will be OK with it. If they love you.

Visit or phone them and leave when you are ready or visit on boxing day

Answer 7

How about a compromise?

Spend the early part of the day with the mums and then gracefully bow out somewhat early so that you can decompress with just the two of you at home in the evening?

That is what we usually do, although sometimes we end up over at friends houses decompressing and comparing war stories with them... LOL

Answer 8

I don't know what you usually do for Christmas, but what if you spend Christmas Eve morning with one mom, and the evening with the other (or have them both over at your house for dinner at the same time) and then spend Christmas day with your girlfriend?

Answer 9

All part of growing up. You must tell them how you feel .After six years I don't think you should beat yourself up over having some private time. They might just understand if you explain how you feel and promise to alternate each Christmas. They were young once. My Son and Daughter are away with their partners almost every year. To be honest it gives us a break!!

Answer 10

I suppose the Isle of Wight for an overnighter would be out of the question - ? This is just in response to ESP, when I tried to dowse a suitable place where the two of you would have privacy and still be able to have a little fun exploring and being together, as well...