My bf wanted to get me something for christmas, but i dont celebrate it..but he doesn't know that XD
I dont want to tell him yet..but anyways, i told him not to get me anything.
he asked me a couple of times already and he insists on getting me something but i told him i dont want anything (which is true) and i dont know if guys take it the wrong way when you dont want to accept a present from them.
i dont want him getting me anything because im afraid the relationship might become about what we give to eachother on christmas or birthdays. i'd rather him give me something when he really means it, no just on a special occassion. so is it a bad thing i did, or good?
2006-12-02 05:53:27 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I'd be glad if I didn't have to worry about getting presents for a birthday, Christmas, Valentine's Day, or anniversaries.
You should tell him how you feel about this kind of gift giving, I think he'll understand. Its a good thing to do (not giving gifts strictly because its a certain day) and both people in the relationship should feel content with what the other does on a regular basis rather than rely on (or expect) only sporadic grand gestures.
I think this should apply in general not just when it comes to gifts. People assign too much meaning to symbolic gestures and big spectacle events. I think happiness in a fufilling realtionship should be given everyday in small regular doses, rather than only occationally in large doses.
Imagine your partner with a huge bag of candy. This bag represents the entire amount of happiness he can give you (whether it's mental, social, emotional, physical, sexual, or economic) for the entire year. If he gave you a handfull of candy everyday you would be content because you would always have a bit of happiness through out the whole year. If he gave you a huge bowl full on only certain occations you'll never be happy. The first hand full would make you happy, you'd get sick if you bindged on more, and the rest would go to waste and mean nothing. Worse yet you're miserable, because you don't get anything until the next time he gives another huge bowl of candy.
You have it right to avoid grand gestures, tell him and get him to understand the concept. I think most guys want that too, especially when it comes to different types sex. There are guys that want regular non-vaginal sex (BJs, backdoor access, or other experience) and their wives only give them those on his birthday, Valentine's Day, and their anniversary.
2006-12-02 06:41:41 · answer #1 · answered by Rukh 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he wants to get you something for Christmas.... just accept it and don't tie Christmas into it. It's just a gift from your boyfriend. What's the harm in that?
If you do not celebrate Christmas then you need to let him know. You might find that he is understanding of your culture.
2006-12-02 13:57:44 · answer #2 · answered by almondjoy_1000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
"honesty is the best policy"... perhaps the best choice is to tell him why you do not want anything for Christmas, and also let him know how you feel about gift giving. He's a guy, I'm sure he will appreciate not feeling like he HAS to get you the perfect gift for every special occassion.
2006-12-02 13:56:38 · answer #3 · answered by Laura 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget bad or good, do one thing. Tell him he can buy u some inexpensive gift and if he wishes on an odd time of the year he can get u gifts somewhat higher priced, however dont refuse a gift altogether
2006-12-02 13:58:04 · answer #4 · answered by vio_prince 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't celebrate it then tell him that but maybe he still will insist on giving it to you because he cares about you and he wants to give you something to show it. And how do you know he doesn't really mean it. if he really cares about you then trust he means it.
2006-12-02 13:58:03 · answer #5 · answered by Risky_Bizness 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well some guys take it the wrong way when girls say they don't want anything. i think that you should tell him that you don't celebrate Christmas because of your religion. he should understand.
2006-12-02 13:58:20 · answer #6 · answered by ~*Godz_ANGEL*~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if i were you i would explain to him why you don't want a present and why you don't celebrate Christmas
2006-12-02 14:00:56 · answer #7 · answered by TaSiAAbaybee =) 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should explain why you don't want a gift other wise he might take it personal. :o(
2006-12-02 13:56:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
come clean about you not celebrating it, it will be better to be honest than for him to think you're pushing him away
2006-12-02 13:56:04 · answer #9 · answered by rchlbsxy2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok
2006-12-02 13:56:00 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋