My boyfriends exwife is a horrible mother.His son has cognitive/learning and emotional disabilites, and she has no interest in helping him she lets him do what he wants, because of all this, the child is not very pleasant to be around.(details in my other questions if u r interested) My BF wants him to move in with us, I am not ready. The boy is unpredictable and has been violent in the past. He goes to therapy on and off. The mother is often "too busy" to bring him regularly.
2006-12-02 04:24:33 · 6 answers · asked by eastcoastdebra 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
the boy is 12
2006-12-02 05:47:47 · update #1
Poor kid.
I can understand your caution - but also commend your boyfriends approach to doing the "right thing".
Bad parenting *can* be compensated for sometimes - and certainly if he finds he is with people that love him and try to help him, he may well prove less difficult than he is now.
He will almost certainly "test you" a little though - so if you do decide to try and help him, expect a few "interesting moments" along the way.
Big choice and not an easy one.
The simple answer to your question thought is "to a point, yes", he could certainly benefit massively from being in a caring environment.
2006-12-02 04:29:59 · answer #1 · answered by Mark T 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
the only way to offset bad parenting is for the child to stay with good parenting. What I mean by this is that the good parent needs the child and child to visit the bad parenting. I wouldn't take on such a big responsibility if it's just your boyfriend. Children with disorders are hard to learn how to handle. Maybe the mother doesn't have the coping skills. Maybe suggest to the mother to take some classes on how to parent a disorder child.
2006-12-02 12:32:25 · answer #2 · answered by ccdispatch911 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Thay is very sad. Unfourtuanetly you can not fix the damage other people have done. You can show him a bettter way of life and make him more pleaent to be around but the damage has alredy been done. Good luck and best whishes.
2006-12-02 15:52:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love your boyfriend you need to make a choice. If you do not want hsi son moving in you will most likely be out the door. Kid come first. He needs a stable home life andif your boyfriend is willing to take on the responsibility you need to decide if you want to remain in his life.
2006-12-02 12:33:59 · answer #4 · answered by Ryan's mom 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
How old is he? His age makes a big difference. If he is over 8, it is next to impossible to change his behavior patterns. If he has mental problems, it is even worse. Military school might do the trick. Children want structure and boundaries, but it has to start early.
2006-12-02 12:34:33 · answer #5 · answered by notyou311 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
yes. but it will be hard work and take time
2006-12-02 12:43:55 · answer #6 · answered by serephina 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋