sexlless relationships, but with strong feelings
2006-12-01 22:35:08 · 16 answers · asked by bowneyes 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Truckinot was on to something, but I don't agree that having an open relationship=cheating in one's heart. You *can* have a relationship without sex in which you care deeply for the person, and it doesn't mean you need to leave them just to find sex somewhere else. The first thing you must (absolutely must) do if you care enough about this relationship is talk about the lack of sex. Why is it happening? Is a physical relationship important to you? Why is it important to you? If your partner really doesn't want that (any more? Did you used to have sex?) or at all, then I would suggest you talk about opening up the relationship...with the understanding that this first relationship still matters and is the primary one. It takes maturity, honesty, communication, and work to do this, but it is an option. I'm sure there are lots of people who will disagree with this, but there are plenty of us who know it *can* be a viable alterantive to monogamy. Love can be an expansive emotion. Good luck.
2006-12-02 01:35:57 · answer #1 · answered by FL LMT 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You say it's sexless, no sex at all or bad sex that leaves you frustrated? My partnership has left me with alot of "down time" as we age our sexual libido has gone in opposite directions. True love can deal with it though and masturbation helps, but it's not the same. Some people can handle sexless relationships and find other things that keep a couple together that replaces it, IE: hobbies, interests, etc. For many people this is not enough. Only you can decide that. Maybe you can have an open relationship and seek sex elsewhere, but this will still be cheating in your heart, if you feel as strongly as you say for this person. Opposites attract, they say, and the most gifted overcome any differences that threaten to sink an otherwise great relationship. Good luck. No sex is a hard row to hoe.
2006-12-02 08:45:39 · answer #2 · answered by truckinotter 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There is info. missing from your question,ie.: Does your partner care for you also? Can you talk to partner about it? Is a sexual relationship all you want?
How about looking at this from a different prospective:
Supposing your partner couldn't have sex at all, either from an accident or illness-would you leave your partner then?
Think of it from that angle for a moment and then decide what is truly important.
2006-12-02 07:02:20 · answer #3 · answered by dragon 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It depends on if they are not able to satisfy you sexually or if they just don't want sex with you at all.
If they are having sex with you but you don't get what you need then what you need to do is to tell them what they can do to please you. If they just don't want to have sex with you then maybe it's best to find someone who does want you sexually.
There is a big difference in "can't" and "wont"
Talk to them about how they feel and what they are willing to do to make it all work.
There is nothing worse than a "one sided" relationship.
2006-12-02 06:46:18 · answer #4 · answered by KieKie 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I guess it depends on what else you are receiving from the relationship that is making the union satisfying to you.
If sex is a problem you can work on it and there are many solutions to this problem. On the other hand, finding a soul mate who can make your lift your life to new heights is a relationship worth working on.
2006-12-02 06:40:10 · answer #5 · answered by AJ... Australia 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well it depends on how much weight you put on sex...me personally i do not like sex and my only relationship i was in i did it just for my partner and he new that as long as he was happy i was but as for me ive had sex with other people and its not any different its not exciting so if you think you can handle not being pleased then dont leave or teach your partner how to please you
2006-12-02 10:36:42 · answer #6 · answered by Mysolitude 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
nope. dont leave.
a relationship is not all about the physical stuff.
theres a lot more to it then just that.
think about the things that are important other then physical stuff.
think about the chats, the times together, the comfort etc.
good luck!
<3
2006-12-02 06:38:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry, but if you aren't pleased with this part of your relationship, it will hurt things in the future.
Physical relations are very important. Having said that, you should discuss your dillema with that person.
2006-12-02 06:41:13 · answer #8 · answered by yogineocon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
only you can really answer this. but alot of relationships don't start out with great sex. it takes time to learn what really pleases your partner. maybe you should sit down and talk about what you want and like
2006-12-02 09:38:59 · answer #9 · answered by Ron N 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
thats the most selfish thing ive ever heard..why are you not pleased and have you discussed it and tried to fix it....the problem is not what you think..its no communication. either value the relationship or realize the real problem and move on.
2006-12-02 06:39:06 · answer #10 · answered by koalatcomics 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋