we've been dating for about 4 months and i love him but not enough to marry him.i think i shoud know him for at least 2 years.but he is really pushing the issue. he also still hasnt divorced his wife and they have a daughter. i told him that its too soon and he doesnt get it. what should i do?
2006-12-01 19:17:37 · 13 answers · asked by HêårtlësS 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i know he cant get married until he gets a divorce. but his wife said that they should have it in a month.
~i appericate all of your answers
2006-12-01 19:35:07 · update #1
he is not divorced. tell him after he had a divorce-you may reconsider. you can't marry him until he is not longer married to another woman.
2006-12-01 19:20:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think 4 months is rushing it a lot and I don't think you really are sure if you are in love with a person after a short 4 months.
Your boyfriend sounds like he has control issues. He is not thinking about his daughter, you or his future. He just is not being very realistic How can you ask someone to marry you when you are not divorced. .
Don't let him force you into a commitment. You sound very level headed and responsible. Just be honest with him and tell him you are not ready. If he freaks out, then maybe he is not the one for you. He sounds a little flaked out and immature.
2006-12-01 19:43:25 · answer #2 · answered by happydawg 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
four months is WAY TOO SOON to declare that you want to spend the rest of your life with someone!! im still finding things out about my husband and ive known him since i was 13, and were now 26!! you cannot know someone properly in 4 months, you will just end up like him and his ex wife, marriage is a sacred thing, and hes only asking you now because he doesnt take marriage seriously and he knows its possible to bail out at any time as hes allready proven. You guys owe it to his daughter to have a stable and lasting marriage, rather than allow her to have 4 new step moms over the years!! TELL HIM TO BACK OFF!!
GOOD LUCK
2006-12-01 20:01:49 · answer #3 · answered by sabina 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should actually just dump him. It's really scary that he is so eager to get married to you, especially since he is still married and that he pressures you to do something you don't want to do. Like a rapist or something; not a good sign. He doesn't seem to value the seriousness of the commitment.
2006-12-01 20:29:24 · answer #4 · answered by RockabillyBanana 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the first instance dating a married man is bad per se. Secondly ur own instincts r against marrying him now. Thirdly what is the guarantee that u can hold him on to u and that he will repeat what he is presently doing to his wife.
2006-12-01 19:32:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
truth hun is all you can tell him if your not ready to get married jsut tell him he loves you enough he will understand that. Should not effect your relationship at al. Waiting longer till marrige is even better for you anyway
Ive been with my bf 5 years and hes wanted to get married for 3 years and we still jsut in love and we are not yet theres a right time for marrige and you will know when
2006-12-01 19:22:38 · answer #6 · answered by Kate 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not only should you not marry this guy right now, you should never marry him at all. He is married and pressuring you into doing something you don't want. The classic sign of a potential abuser. Run, girl, run.
2006-12-01 19:28:42 · answer #7 · answered by Liz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just be honest with him. If he really loves you then he won't push you..but wanted to get married again is his prerogative and if you won't do it he might find it elsewhere..if that's the case you don't want to be with him anyway
2006-12-01 20:35:41 · answer #8 · answered by SunnySmile83 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should marry him right away. Sounds like a match made in heaven.
2006-12-01 19:32:03 · answer #9 · answered by vinny_the_hack 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously he cant marry you. He's still married. You're correct in not consenting to marriage. He's NOT ready. There's no big hurry. If he cant accept that, that's HIS problem, not yours!
2006-12-01 19:30:18 · answer #10 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋