My husband pushes me away. Why does he do this?

Question

I've just about given up!

Like tonight, for example - he was going to the fire hall to drink with his friends and I said, "come here" to give him a hug and kiss. And he tells me "I dont want to get sick" (which he has kissed me before)

He always makes excuses. Like "i'm trying to work" or "I'm doing something" or "i'm sleeping"

It doesn't go with the lack of trying.

I'm a very touchy feeling person. He's very cold to me. I even have tried giving him a "BJ" and he is just like "Go away, I have things to do".

I am very good to him yet he gives me absolutely no affection!

Answer 1

Your husband does this??? Maybe its time to rethink this relationship...

Answer 2

I know how u feel my husband & I have been married for 2 yrs together 3yrs. October was the 1st time in 17 months we had sex!! I only get 2 kisses when either of us leave the house!! I tired of the cold shouler!! I've gone to c a lawyer already (I think that's why we had mercy sex). We both have grounds for a divorce I just don't have the money!!
I can tell u one thing it's NOT US IT'S THEM!! If I wasn't with my husband 24/7 I would swore he was having an affair but I know he's not!!
Leave for go to a hotel for a few days if u have the money & see how he takes it!! I also suggust that u talk to a lawyer!!
Good Luck!!

Answer 3

I don't know i think he is seeing someone else and he feels he is cheating on this person if he kisses you or makes love to you. Even if he was having trouble in that department he would at least kiss you. Have you sat down with him and tryed to talk to him about this. Tell him you are fed up with the rejection and ask him why is he doing this. You could explore things out too, has he started this all of a sudden? Does he go missing, Does he hide his phone or have it on him all the time, Has he started to show extra interest in his appearance. Just look out for signs, look!! it may just be he is depressed too. Only you can find out why. Good luck

Answer 4

first you must decide just how much this bothers you weighed against your marriage. You need to tell him what you just told us and ask him why. You probably will not get an answer so then you must decide if it is worth ending your marriage to try and correct this. If you decide it is not worth ending the marriage, then honey get yourself a good vibrator and make yourself happy and then you wont care OR tell him how you feel about his cold treatment and that you want to got to counciling because if this does not change you are going to leave him. Don't say this unless you mean it because you really might have to do it.

Was he this way befor the marriage? Has he always been like this or is this something new. If it is his personality, didn't you realize that before the wedding. If this is relatively new behavior I think you need to look for where that affection is now going. Good Luck

Answer 5

Honey you got real problems. No mans turns down a BJ! Honestly though as a man, when I've felt this way it's cuz I wanted out and just made excuses to not deal with the issues. Got to try an pin him down and talk to him to find out whats going on. In the end you guys must find a way to communicate or it's over.

Answer 6

You don't say whether he used to be affectionate or not. If this is a change in his behavior, then you really need to get to the bottom of things.

I am sorry - that's such a terrible way to be treated and I have been right where you are.

You need to talk openly and honestly with him - try to avoid anger and accusations, but be prepared. If he's truly honest with you, you may not like the answers.

But you're not liking the current situation either. It's extremely difficult and heart-breaking to be in a marriage of one.

Good luck to you! Don't be afraid, don't get angry, don't get even, don't take responsiblity for his failures....but do be ready for some serious decisions in your future. Don't wait until something gets dumped in your lap on his timing....take the initiative and face this honestly together.

Answer 7

People have different needs when it comes to affection. I am in the opposite side, my husband is the touchy, feeling type of guy, while I am just the opposite. My advice is to back off some, make him miss you, you'll see the difference. More is not always better.

Answer 8

You should give him a taste of his own medicine. Start ignoring him. Get dressed and go out and dont tell him anything. When he asks you something tell him to leave you alone you have things to do. watch his attititude do a 360 because he will think you have found someone else because you are no longer hanging all over him. He will start giving you the affection you need because he will feel the way you felt and he want like it.

Answer 9

8 Years ago my husband did the very same thing to me.I still cry when I think back the way I let him treat me.After 9 months of being treated like I way the enemy he moved out got his own place.After 2 and a half years he moved back home.That's when I fond out about his affair he was having the 9 month he was living home and still having sex with me.Your husband is having an affair I no you don't want to hear that just like l didn't.

Answer 10

Your 1st plan would be to sit him down and try and find out why he's being a cold jerk if fails have a talk to some of his buddys see what they know.Your next plan would try buy some real hot lingere if that fails try a private investigator to find what he's up to. Then your final plan is leave and file for a divorce.

Answer 11

It's time to T-A-L-K and put it all out there. You have not said how long you have been together but with such reactions it does not much matter... you are extending love through physical affection and he is telling you to "get back"... YEP... T-A-L-K - nor FUSS or NAG. Do the thing we girls all know how to do so well and fix his favorite meal, put the babies to bed, send them to the in-laws, or call a sitter for a night out (if you have children)... it is time for you to CONNECT with your husband is HEAR what he really has to tell you.