theres is this big rummer that in a leasbiean and i sware i am not and im in 7th grade its like all around the city and i live in a small small city and its soo depressing cuze ppl at school are rarly talking to me or inviting me places all of my friend have grown away from me. and my friend that goes to a differnt school in the same city someone told her that i was leasbiean and people and i just come to commit suicide cuze i hate this i mean i never did anything to any one i was always soo nice to every one
are there any ways to change the rummer besides becoming a slut
2006-12-01 14:45:02 · 13 answers · asked by Tailor L 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
It sounds like someone really did a number on you. If you had any idea who it was, you should go after this person - seriously. Defamation of character is very serious and has a long-term negative emotional impact.
This is a scar you could carry with you for the rest of your life.
Speak to your parents about this. They will help advise you. If you go to church, speak to your priest/pastor for advice. Speak to your friends about this and tell them that you are planning a lawsuit because of the way this has effected you (this will have the effect of trickling through the same gossipy grapevine that started all of this). Make sure you mention that you are trying to find out who started this rumor.
The more people you speak to about this, the more light is shined on the issue. Do not shy away from this course of action because it will be something that will stay in the back of your head for a long time.
The person(s) responsible for this will eventually retract their words.
When a bright light is shined on darkness, the darkness will disappear. The same is true with a dark rumor - when the light of truth presents itself.
Give it a little time, but make certain you start communicating your feelings to all those you know and express how angry you are at the person who started this nonsense.
PS: You made a statement "change the rummer besides becoming a ****"
**If** you are not a lesbian, why on earth would you even consider this??? Don't repeat it to yourself as any kind of an option. Get very angry if someone tries to persuade you that this is an option and make sure you speak to an adult about that right away!
Good luck to you - things will work out.
.
2006-12-02 10:17:52 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Tailor. If you're the object of a rumor, consider whether you want to own the rumor. If the rumor is that you're a lesbian, do you really consider being a lesbian that bad? If you think of a lesbian as just another form of being a girl, just as a gay guy is just another form of being a guy, then being gay or a lesbian is nothing to feel good or bad about. It is just the way someone is. Like being left handed. Most people are right handed...if you're left handed you have lots of problems because everythign is made for right-handed people. If you're lesbian you will have difficulty because most "situations" are designed for "straight" people. But there's nothing wrong with being lesbian or with being left handed. If you're not lesbian, then the rumor is meaningless. If you are lesbian, then the rumor is also meaningless. You are what you are. Another person saying you are left-handed doesn't make you that way. And if you are left-handed, calling you that is meaningless.
You have a lot of good advice in these answers. Listen, grow and learn. And remember, every day will bring something new. Including new rumors.
2006-12-01 23:37:24 · answer #2 · answered by judgebill 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please keep your chin up. Let people think what they want. You cannot change how they think, but you can change how you think.
Believe it or not, what people think of you now will not matter when you get older. It is easier said than done, but forget their immature rumors and focus on your future. Focus on what makes you happy and what you like to do for fun. I had a hard time in Jr. High school and High school myself. I was always so shy and I had such low self-esteem. About the 7th grade myself, for some unknown reason, my friends began to ignore me. I was devastated and so lonely for so long. by 16, I hit rock bottom. I was on the verge of suicide and placed into an adolescent unit for depression/anxiety. There I took a new approach to life. I just began to let me be myself. I be gain to not hide anymore and after I let go, I took that new attitude in life. I quickly began to make new friends who I am still friends with today at 25 years old.
You sound like someone who needs a pal to talk to. If you ever need to talk to someone in private and you don't feel comfortable speaking to your parents or a professional, just say so and I can give you my email.
Otherwise, do talk to someone immediately. You sound so depressed and you are too special to not be in this world.
2006-12-01 22:56:06 · answer #3 · answered by Peanut Butter 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK pull yourself together. I was teased from fifth to eighth grade, and horrible rumors about me that I wouldn't even be able to say on "answers" or I would get reported. It was amazingly hard but it actually made me who I am today. I have chosen a life of truth and I am happy. I know it seams there is no end to your suffering but it will end. It is Karma from a previous life that we have to get in return. What goes around comes around. You did not do this to someone in this life but you did cause someone this same misery in a previous life. (what goes around comes around). But it is a temporary situation. Taking ones own life never stops one misery. One becomes a ghost. A ghost is someone who has no senses and they constantly think of thier misery that they where thinking about at the time they died. No one hears or sees them and they are extremely lonly and suffering incessently. That misery goes on for a hundred years or more if they miss the chance to go to thier next life. So don't think you will end your suffering this way. Read some e-books on stelphen-knapp.co they will give you a deeper happiness that no one can take away from you. You need to learn how to deal with criticism it is just what ignorant mean people do. e-mail me if you need more help.
2006-12-01 23:04:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
rumors arent all that great, but they will fade! this might be a big thing to talk about right now, but as soon as the nxt rumor comes along nobody will remember it. u should learn from this, coz now u c who really is ur friend! those who turned away from u because of this aren't worth it. plus, if they were real friends, they'd ask u if what they heard is true, or don't believe it in the first place!
maybe u should just convince those who do talk to u n do some non-gay things, like having a hot guy's pic in ur agenda or somethin like that.
dont worry too much, it will be over soon n then nobody's gonna care nemore. just take it with humor, makes it easier.
good luck! n keep being a nice person.
2006-12-01 22:59:53 · answer #5 · answered by Karin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In addition to my last statement - you don't "become" a lesbian. You're born that way.
Just sit back and watch everyone be crazy and talk. Its a bad part of being a teen. Rumors come and rumors go...none are any good. One thing this will teach you is not to pass them. Still, I know how much it hurts. Its horribly painful.
Please, don't listen to bad posters. Some of the people are just as ignorant as those that pass rumors.
You're a good person with a good heart. Keep your head held high and...smile. Its the best cure for the sad soul.
2006-12-01 22:57:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take care sweety, as long as you know who you are and aren't afraid to be yourself... people will say what they will say, but you don't have to listen to it. Know in yourself that they are unsure of who they are and that is why they need to get in on rumors and stay with the crowd. Be confident in yourself and when others see how beautiful you are they will want to be your friend over the other. Living in a small town can be difficult because of rumors and cliques, talk to your family and let them know what is going on so that they can be supportive. If it becomes even worse, you may be able to switch schools and make new friends in your new school. Good Luck hon, send a note if you ever need to talk!
2006-12-01 22:56:21 · answer #7 · answered by River 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey,slow down don't do anything rash.I don't know if your a lesbian or not and if you are its not the end of the world.you are young and have your whole life ahead of you.Do not concern your self with what others think.You are your own unique person.Ignore hurtful people they usually empty their trash on people that are down and out.You just need someone to talk to.Change your habits,places you hang out and your so called friends.people will find someone else to pick on before you know it.Go enroll at a gym and burn your frustration off,you will be fine.Find a good book to read ,and stay away from the butt heads who are hurting you.Please just try to take care of yourself!
2006-12-01 23:07:11 · answer #8 · answered by one10soldier 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Who cares what they think? Keep your head up high and know that God put you on this earth for a reason. Just try to find that reason. If you need to talk to someone, just let me know and i will give you my email.
2006-12-01 23:13:09 · answer #9 · answered by The Heartbreak Kid 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
being gay aint a big deal, just wait til high school there will be people there. everyones pretty much retarded still in junior high, nothing to fret about and its a moronic reason to take your life over a few b!tches that dont know sh!t.
2006-12-01 22:48:20 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋