my boy is 15 me partner wants me to cut my duties down as a mother to my son, my partner isnt my boys farther, me and my partner have been together now 14months now and all my partner wants is me on my own with out my family, but i came as a baggae not on my own, can any one tell me how do i get them to sit down and talk and keep my partner quite so i can lay down boundries.
2006-12-01 14:07:55 · 2 answers · asked by A A 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
huked on foicks wurked fur me
2006-12-01 14:09:59 · answer #1 · answered by Jennifer D 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You seem to have the answer yourself. You came as a package, not singly. He needs simply to be told he accepts you both or he hits the road. Moreover, you tell your partner that he's not your son's father, that he has no right to make rules for or to discipline him, that is exclusively your prerogative.
Then you sit your 15 year old down and tell him that your partner is not a substitute for his father and no attempt will be made to make him one. However, that you have to do what is good for your happiness as well as his. So he has to get used to your partner being around and understand that your attention will be divided between him and your son; but that when push comes to shove, the son comes first (and he should, he's your obligation and that comes ahead of your desire for your partner).
I don't suggest that either sit down to talk with the other until such time as they are both ready, willing and able to do so. Set the rules individually, and get between them when the rules get broken.
2006-12-01 22:14:45 · answer #2 · answered by William E 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋