i have this horrible habit of spending more [way] more than my income. both my husband and i work, when payday..comes i get excited about having money and go shopping like to target...yesturday thats what i did, and now i dont have enough for rent & the car insurance. i promise my self everytime that next payday i will not spend more than what i have to, because afterwards i feel awful, worried on how to pay the bills. i wanna go return the things i bought yesturday, wich are x-mas stuff ormanents, and my husbands x-mas gift. i hate leaving this way. i suffer from depresion, i will admit this brings me joy...but it only comes with worries after. i spent about $70 at K- mart for a pizza party my kids got invated to, i wanna return that, and not go. i know i should have a budget, but its almost impossible, it feels to good at the time with the money. my husband doesnt know this.
2006-12-01 12:15:07 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Business & Finance ➔ Personal Finance
***should i return the stuff?
2006-12-01 12:24:31 · update #1
Return the items, pay your bills. Set up automatic web bill pay for your bank to draft the money straight out of your pay check. If the money goes right to your bills you won't have the oppourtunity to blow it. Also if you still can't control yourself maybe you can see a conselour, and get suggestions that are a little more personal to you.
2006-12-01 12:44:03 · answer #1 · answered by VL 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit down and make a list of (1) your monthly expenses - the bare minimum like rent, car, utilities, and food - and then make a list of (2) your monthly income.
It sounds like credit cards are your problem? Cut up your credit cards except for one that has the highest maximum and then put it in a plastic pitcher full of water and freeze it! This way you have it for emergencies but can't use it for your impulse purchases. Depending on how much credit debt you have and on the number of cards and interest rate, you might want to consider getting debt consolidation to help you pay them off in a timely manner. You could probably set an auto-deduct from your bank account to pay these bills before you even see the money.
The root of this problem is that you are not happy with at least one aspect of your life. The shopping and consuming feeds this unhappiness and for a moment makes you feel good but it does not last because you haven't come to the root of your problem. It is no different than addictions to drugs, alcohol, sex... they are all manifestations of some deep-seated unhappiness that has not been addressed in your life.
If you can't pay the bills or afford this habit, then this becomes an even worse cycle for you. There are many people addicted to spending but some never come to any conclusion that it makes them feel bad because they can afford it financially. Emotionally, however, they can't.
So, first you need to take care of the financial aspect. You need to tell your husband. That trust needs to be there between the two of you. He needs to know. This is his future also! Secondly, you need to find a counselor to help you with the emotional issue(s) in your life and help you come to terms with them.
I know you can do it! It feels horrible now, but you'll be able to overcome it!
2006-12-01 20:32:24 · answer #2 · answered by dimples 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Simply returning the stuff is not going to get down to the root of the problem, and that is that you may need some counseling. I think maybe you have a problem which is much deeper than your finances. And you need to let your husband know what's going on, and that you want to seek help for it. Anything less can break up your marriage. Think about your kids-what's a pizza party when they have no home? You may also think about relinquishing control of your paycheck to your husband, and letting him give you a budget. I also recommend you cut any of your credit cards, to prevent temptation.
2006-12-01 20:29:27 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, you really need to get counseling. This is a form of addiction and it is already affecting your life. Not having the money for rent and insurance and you have kids and a husband. Not good! I understand that this makes you feel good and only comes with worries afterwards, but smoking, alcohol and drugs have the same effect. Please get help, for your childrens sake.
2006-12-01 20:20:28 · answer #4 · answered by kwightman69 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You should check out the local chapter of "Debtors Anonymous". It is a 12 Step program that will help you with your addictive behavior.
2006-12-01 20:20:43 · answer #5 · answered by Bonnie B 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am the same way.
I don't spend huge amounts, just more than I have.
When ya run out of credit. Then it takes care of itself. Then you have to work if you can and get more money. Not usually fun either.
2006-12-01 20:21:04 · answer #6 · answered by kurticus1024 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
that is one of the sure shot symptoms of Bi-polar. You might want to get checked out. I have been on anti-burn-a- hole-in-my -pockets pills for 5 years. (grins big)
2006-12-01 20:28:06 · answer #7 · answered by Rhino-Jo 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Maybe you should start thinking about going back to school and getting a better job (better paying job). It seems like your income is too low...
2006-12-01 20:25:36 · answer #8 · answered by RetroBunny69 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
well your spending yourself right out of home he needs to kick you out and find a better wife ..ill give it another 6 months and your gone .he is probaly working on it now behind your back
2006-12-01 20:24:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 5⤋
you sound like the majority,of women. no wonder a man gets upset so much!! you should take lessons from my wife.she is a smart shopper.
2006-12-01 20:19:51 · answer #10 · answered by Tired Old Man 7 · 0⤊ 6⤋