When she gets me alone she says hurtful things to me mainly about my children. I married her only child. I had two sons from a previous marriage and she feels we have kept him from having a real marriage and children of his own. She says my children aren't real grandchildren because they're not blood. She also told me she used to tell her son to send the kids to their real fathers house to mooch off of him instead her son. Am I being too sensitive?
2006-12-01 10:53:12 · 25 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No, I dont think you are. This woman is being INSENSITIVE. When your husband married you he took the responcibility of taking care of your precious children and I pray that he loves them as equally as his own. I would try my best to be patient with this woman, as horrible as situations can be. She is your mother now, even if she is not of the same blood. Maybe you might try asking her if she really took you in as her daughter when you married her son. Because you both are here to stay in each other's families, and I think the last thing you'll really want is to be on bad terms with this woman for the rest of your and your husbands marriage, which I hope will be your whole lives :). God deals with those who offend and hurt us, and the best thing you could really do is forgive this woman, and keep giving her the respect of a mother, even if you know she doesnt deserve it. We dont deserve to be forgiven a trillion times by God, nor loved so unconditionally. He will help you find peace with your mother. And also, in doing this, she has no opportunity to accuse you of doing the opposite. 2 wrongs dont make a right, right? So perhaphs the best medicine is showing your mother-in-law better than she might treat you.
Does your husband feel this way? It would be very important to tell your husband about this if you already havent!
I`ll be praying for you! Dont give up on this woman, God never gives up on any of us, and He is always available to talk to in a time of need like this one! He asks you that you will come and speak to Him and truly follow Him, and in doing so I am 150%POSSITIVE that this sitaution will find a peacful resolution. If you have not considered this, please do consider it now! I have leaned on Him in the very worst of situations, and none have ever come out unsolved.
" Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait I say on the Lord." Psalm 27:14
God bless you and your honey and your children!
2006-12-01 11:21:15 · answer #1 · answered by Miss PIff 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No- your mother in law is a shrew. I think you should tape record her and play it for your husband. Then let him handle it. If he doesn't defend you and his marriage then you will know where you stand. If he didn't handle it I would tell that nasty pit viper that if she doesn't back off you are going to move her "baby boy" so far away she may never see you or HIM again. I can't believe how mean some people can be. Good Luck with your mother in law and I hope your husband backs you up. I don't think you are being too sensitive but maybe too nice.
2006-12-01 10:59:19 · answer #2 · answered by therealprinsess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will only accept criticism from people you value. Why would you value this person's opinion?
When she says this crazy stuff you should respond as though it is the most outragous and funny thing you have ever heard. Repeat back what she said as though you *know* she must be joking because there is NO WAY anyone would say something that mean for real.
"Oh, you are too funny. My children have ruined my husbands life? That's a good one. You really know how to make me laugh."
2006-12-01 11:06:37 · answer #3 · answered by Jennifer D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't sit back and take her putting you and the kids down. Speak up. You have just as much right to do this as she does. I hope your husband sides with you and speaks up to his mother about the things she says to you and about the boys. If he doesn't he's not much of a man. I'd just tell the woman that your husband married you knowing you had two children and have accepted them and if she doesn't want to accept them into the family then you won't bring them around her cause your not going to allow her to make them feel not a part of the family. Case closed. Good luck to you ;o)
2006-12-01 11:13:28 · answer #4 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh no, you're not being too sensitive, what she says is outrageous. Your husband needs to step in and have a serious talk with her. If he's not on your side in this, you will be fighting an up-hill battle, and it will probably hurt your relationship in the long run. This is NO WAY to be treated by your husband's mother. I know I wouldn't have enough patience to have this woman in my house after something like this was said.
2006-12-01 11:07:43 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, you aren't. You just have an oddball for an in law. Luckily, you are married to her son, not to her. While it's nice to get along with her, it isn't necessary to sit and listen to her spew silly tripe. I suggest that the next time she starts saying thing that are waaaay out of line, you simply tell her that her remarks upset you, and that you'd like her to leave your home. Yup, that WILL cause a huge hassle, but you are a wife, not a doormat. You have much larger problems IF your husband doesn't support you on this issue.
2006-12-01 11:07:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, you are not being too sensitive. My gosh! That woman is terrible. If she truly loves her son, she should see he is happy with you and accept you - and accepting "you" includes your children. Do your kids hear this? Does your husband know? I would have a little sit down with the 3 of you and just confront her. You don't deserve that. If your husband didn't want a woman who had kids, he wouldn't have asked you to be his wife. She must have some serious insecurities in herself, maybe even jealous of you being the main woman in his life. Just take it with a grain of salt, and try not to let it get to you.
2006-12-01 10:59:06 · answer #7 · answered by Carey L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no your not.
your mother in law is a bi**h!!! the best thing for you to do is avoid her. don't try to get your husband to fix this. you do it.
avoid her as much as possible. if she makes remarks about your children treat her with as much respect as she has shown you. don't be a doormat!!! tell her that she's being rude and that you don't appreciate it. tell her that she also is not blood to you and your children and that you do not have to lay down and constantly listen to her nasty remarks just because you are married to her son. tell her that if she would like to have a civil relationship with you and your children you are willing to do so but, you will not allow her to constantly bully you and your children.
DO NOT YELL. SAY WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY AND LET IT GO WITH THAT. STAND UP FOR YOURSELF. and again do not make your husband stand up for you. you are a big girl and are fully cape able of opening your mouth in an adult fashion!!!
if she continues to bully you and treat you and your children badly REFUSE to see her!!! and then stick to it!!!
you do not have to be treated that way.
i know how you feel, been there done that!
this worked for me. my mother in law finally came around. it was a little strained at first, but it worked.
2006-12-01 11:31:31 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is horrible. If this is for real, it is something else. You mother-in-law is a real piece of work, what a charm. I would not make myself available to hear her venomous attacks. Be nice, kind, and respectful when around her, do not mistreat or disrespect her. And by no means be around her alone to give her a chance to pour out her hate and evilness. Then you should be fine, she has no control over her son, it is obvious that he loves you and has chosen a life with you. She is just going to have to learn to deal with you. And keep in mind it is his mother so, just do your best. She does not have to like you, she does have to respect you and will do so as long as her son is around. Good luck and God bless****
2006-12-01 11:00:29 · answer #9 · answered by ? 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You tell that woman that if she has something to say to you, she should say it in front of her son. You are not the devil... and do not have to tolerate her mean and hurtful attacks. Tell your husband about it, and ask him if he knows of any way to head it off. If he doesn't want involved, that is your go ahead to be assertive, and to confront her before she even stops. Insist that he at least be there. Good luck to you. I would try to resolve it before the holidays get here too... that way there isn't a scene in front of others, especially your kids.
2006-12-01 11:09:08 · answer #10 · answered by WifeandMom 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋