i have a friend he is 15 yrs old and he has a crush on me. but i dont like him. it makes me fell bad because i dont like him. it makes me sad. his best friend told me that he dreams about me everyday. he gets nervous when he talks to me. he blushes. he does not know that i know that he likes me. his friend told me that anything nice i say in one day makes him feel happy. how can i tell him i dont like him without making him feel bad?
i just like him as a friend and no more.
2006-12-01 10:21:04 · 10 answers · asked by carol 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
what if he asks me out what do i say? how can i be nice and not offencive?
2006-12-01 10:23:10 · update #1
but the thing is that i cant hook him up with anyone cause he does not speak that much english. and none of my friends like him :-(
2006-12-01 10:37:20 · update #2
here is the catch....the best friend the one that told me is the guy that i like.
and i tink he has not asked me out is because he values his friends friendship. plus today the guy i like asked me for my # lol
2006-12-01 11:47:58 · update #3
Tell him you value his friendship at this point in your life rather than a romantic relationship. Your friendship with him will probably change regardless of what you say to him, because he will feel rejected no matter how you say it. Just be honest. You like him as a friend, right? So tell him so. And for God sakes don't start acting all weird around him. You want things to stay as much the same as possible. Hope that helps you :)
2006-12-01 10:56:58 · answer #1 · answered by Sirius's Mommy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you like another boy. That way you don't have to come out and tell him directly that you're not interested in him. You don't even have to bring up his crush on you. But he'll get the hint that he's not going to get anything more than friendship from you.
If you're really not interested in anyone, just make up a boy. Like...you met some guy last week at your cousin's house. He goes to some school 30 miles away.
Also, start distancing yourself from him. Don't spend time with him, even as friends, because he may take it the wrong way.
good luck!
mari
2006-12-01 18:55:20 · answer #2 · answered by mari m 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's ok that you just want to be friends, and probably better for the time being. If he asks you out, just say something like "Ok, but let's not get mushy or anything like that, after all, we are friends!" (Kind of joke around when you say it.) After that, he'll decide whether or not he wants to be your boyfriend or not. If he does, (and you decide no to accept), just tell him how you feel. If ya'll are already friends, he won't mind hearing what you have to say.
2006-12-01 18:29:09 · answer #3 · answered by CruelChick 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he has a Crush on you,.. there is nothing you can say or do. He may ALWAYS remember you and his crush on you,.. to the day he dies (hopefully that won't be his last thought).
That is how Crushes go. I have gained stalkers that started out Crushes. Try not to be alone with him because at his age he may have problems with control. It is good you are close in age so you can talk to him,.. but it is also bad because he can think there are better odds of something happening.
You can try telling him whatever you want,.. you can tell him you will never love him and call him names,.. you can beat him to a bloody mess. If he has a crush,.. nothing will change his mind. Just don't tell him you hate him and he is bad and things like that,.. when you beat him down emotionally,.. it will be worse then him giving himself low self esteem. It's like Santa Claus wakeing up a child from a dead sleep with water balloons every year and yelling " I'd throw you in a pit of fire if I could,.. here,.. have your yearly shards of glass".
It may work best not to say anything at all,.. and just try not to be left alone with him (completely alone) or his imagnation might get control of his body for a moment.
Added: If he ask you out. Say your sorry but your not interested. If he keeps bothering you ignore him,.. if he won't leave you alone for a week remind him he is harassing and that you know it wouldn't work out and then you couldn't be friends any more. Distract him with other people interested in him,.. he will try to follow your advise,.. so if you know someone is interested in him,.. you will be like God in telling him about that person.... but his crush will make him turn to going back to pineing over you as soon as the relationship is off with the other person. Weather he shows he is pineing over you or not.
Added2: Well then don't hook him up. >.> If he is foreign or his parents are or their culture has been running through the generations so strongly they don't learn English (or much anyways)... then there may be a misinteruptation. The expressions he gives may be normal for his family and what they are use to. Some times people think someone being friendly that does not speak much English is flirtatious. But look what you have to compare to,.. Rape and makeing threatening gestures is in,.. which you are likely not aware of at your age since companies and advertisement have been trying to work it in since the 80's. So it's actually entertainment and marketing eccacutives that have gotten things this way,.. not people's money or stories... you wouldn't know these stories if a company didn't do a ton and invest alot of money into getting these "stories" to you. Anyways,.. there is this chance now that there isn't a crush and people are makeing up stuff based on body language. So don't hook him up,.. and try to act like there isn't a crush >.< Very confuseing isn't this. If you need a flash realization in body language,.. you wave,... a Texan/Gentleman tips their hat, and a Japanese person bows. If you Bow, people think your being sarcastic or something. If you tip your hat while not wearing one,.. people get confused. If they do have a crush,.. you don't NEED to hook them up.
Added3: Ouch,.. that might be a bad sign. The guy you like may be thinking you have a crush on him (the guy you like himself,.. not the guy that's supposed to have a crush on you) and trying to get rid of you or thinking you like someone he hangs out with so trying to hook you up like that. This is going to be hard to figure out and fix. The crush guy hasn't approached you,.. the guy you like has. People seem to work just fine with " I don't like him, I like you"... some times the person crushing on you sends someone to talk to you and this is a normal out come. The person crushing tends to pick someone that can approach you and you will talk to,.. it happens alot. The person with the crush will be upset if you two get together but deal with it better then any other situation.
2006-12-01 18:31:31 · answer #4 · answered by sailortinkitty 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i have a similar problem, offensive or not youve got to squish this while you still can. I let my problem get way out of hand. he asked me out. I simply said "I don't feel the same way about you that you feel about me" when he kept begging I said firmly, but not unkindly "until you can gather your emotions and keep them under control, our friendship must cease to exist." He finally got over it. Best of luck!
2006-12-01 18:39:35 · answer #5 · answered by HP 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe the friend is just having fun with you and it really is not true.
I would just take it easy and not hurt his feeling and be nice to him. He might just want you for a friend too.
Don't jump the hurdle before you get to it: if he ever does ask you out then tell him you like him as a friend but do not wish to get serious.
Things change in life. It is better to keep a friend and be nice than to crush someone's feelings. Some day you might want to go out with this guy - long into the future. If he is nice and respects you and he seems to do that, then you should feel good about his admiration.
Forty Five years ago I had a guy friend like this. We met at a summer party and hit it off but we went to different schools. We never got to see much of each other and we never dated but we talked on the phone several times a week and on weekends. I was not interested in him romantically but I sort of knew he was crushing on me badly but he had great respect for me and never pushed me.
I went to college and dropped out to get married, so we lost track of each other. He enlisted in the Army to go to Vietnam. After Vietnam he went to college and settled in Chicago. He went to my parents home when he got out of the Army to ask me to marry him (mind you we had never dated). He had been wounded in Vietnam and survived a horrible ordeal there. My parents were thrilled to see Bob but very upset and told him they did not like the man I eloped with and had disowned me and not spoken to me for 2 years. He said he did not want to interfere with my marriage in any way so he went to Chicago to attend college on the GI Bill.
He said he was devastated but decided to get on with his life and moved to Chicago to go to school and work.
I guess we always remembered each other fondly. This past summer I decided to try to find him but he has a fairly common name so that led to plenty of dead ends and his Mom was not listed any place. Finally, one day I thought to look for him on Classmates and I found a person I was sure was him; so I wrote him an email through the system.
It only took one day for him to write me back and now we call and email every week or so. My parents never told me he came back to look for me. He tells me he has always loved me and we laugh about our young years. I love him too; not romantically (I am married to my second husband now; who understands about young relationships) but as a really good friend and I think we would each do almost anything for each other.
You never know what the future may hold.
2006-12-01 18:42:36 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just let him no where you stand and that you don't want to ruin your friendship and then hook him up with a girl you know he may like.
2006-12-01 18:25:49 · answer #7 · answered by kbmack73 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
u can tell him that he is like a brother for u and that u only like him as a friend, but trying not to hurt him, thats what girls normally say to guys
2006-12-01 20:49:46 · answer #8 · answered by ~~Chiki~~ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can say OK we can go out as friends......... because i like you as my friend......... you can say that you appreciate what he feels for you however explain that you feel different about him but that doesn't mean you can be friends let him know you care for him too
2006-12-01 18:27:45 · answer #9 · answered by user 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey everybody start saying this hip new word for idiot. DIMMO
Call him a manwhore
2006-12-01 18:23:02 · answer #10 · answered by Lespaul 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋