Did he cheat? new information has surfaced.?

Question

About two years ago I received a call from a female stating that she had an affair with my husband. She would not tell me her name, but I did have the call traced and found out it came from a city close to where we lived. I later visited my husband at work and overheard his female co-worker on the phone and I told him that she sounded like the female who called my house. He said I was paranoid.

Now, two years later, he admitted to grabbing this female's booty, but swears nothing happened. I do know that he took her home a few times. He admitted that the phone incident occured after he grabbed her booty. The thing is, my husband worked overnight during this timeframe and she lived around the corner from the job.

I do not know what to make of this. What should I do?

Answer 1

Go with your instincts- they are not often wrong. If you think it was a one time incidence and you can forgive him get both of you into some marriage counseling and work through it. If you don't think you can forgive him or you think your relationship is too damaged or he is a repeat cheater get you stuff together and leave him. Either way it will be a tough time. Stay strong, this was not your fault. Good Luck.

Answer 2

No stranger would phone you to say she had had an affair with your husband unless it was true. Further more, you should have done something about this two years ago when the call came in. Secondly, you haven't trusted him for the past two years, because you had the phone call traced....if you are suspicious, then you can't trust him. He isn't worthy of your trust. The real question is: Would you be better off with or without him?
If it looks like a rose and smells like a rose, no matter what name you give it, it may still stink!

Answer 3

You are bringing something up from TWO YEARS ago?! All of the details aren't hear but let's look at this logically.
Someone called you said they had an affair but wouldn't say who they were. why would they call and tell you?
OF COURSE the call would be in the area. How else would he have this so called affair?

What it sounds like is he did something inappropriate ie grab someone's heiney and somebody tried to burn him and when that didn't work created an environment of circumstantial evidence that would either create such mistrust you'd leave him or at least chew on it.

I'd say if you really think there is something to it. Hire a detective. Because the nagging doubt will destroy yourelationship

Answer 4

A kiss is cheating, going out with somebody else that is not your wife or husband is cheating, now you said that your husband grabbed her booty; To me he is trying to cheat!!!. Why on earth will he be grabbing her booty? Now you shouldn't be concern about if he cheat. You should be concern about why did he do it. It looks like you too have a lack of communication. If he hasn't cheat in the sexual manner than, he is certainly thinking about it. Talk to him and ask why did he do it. and what would he do if something like that had happen to you. Now as for the girl that has been calling you, she's either pissed because he didn't go farther or because they have some kind of a relationship. Hire a private investigator if your husband can't be honest with you. Good Luck.

Answer 5

Sounds like you have a smoking gun and a body, surely the Judge will convict!

Why would some strange person just call you up and admit to something like that? It sounds suspicious, especially if the call came from the town in which they were working, etc.

Sounds like something you should at least ask about to get information directly from your husband. Don't make assumptions, but find out for yourself before you go off the handle and do irreparable damage to your relationship.

Good Luck.

Answer 6

I believe that by nature men will be tempted, everyone is human after all, some men just cannot stop. Chances are your husband did cheat. From my point of view, it takes two to make a marriage work, why did he cheat? Is it just because he is an asshole or is it because he is unahappy with you? The way I got my husband to admit to me that he cheated was to tell him that I knew everything and had proof. I told him that if he did not admit to me exactly what he had done at that very moment that I would walk out the door and file for divorce because I was giving him the opportunity to tell me the truth and to work on our marriage. I told him that no matter what he told me that I would NOT leave him and that I promised to work it out. Well...he started spilling the beans immediately and then..I dropped a bombshell...I CHEATED TOO!! Well....he left me .... LOL Anyway, long story short, best thing that ever happened to me. If the marriage is worth saving then you need to make some changes also and make sure that you are doing everything for him that needs to be done.

Instead of constantly trying to find out if he cheated then take that energy and focus it on him and making him happy and being the wife that he would NEVER cheat on. Wear his butt out at night..make sure he has NO energy for any other woman but you! Surprise him with massages, wear sexy lingerie, strip for him, talk to him about what would make him feel more fulfilled. Hopefully he will return that love and sacrifice to you. Do that if you think it is worth it. It isn't a sure fire way to make things work, he could possibly be a cheater for life...but he may never admit it. You could spend the rest of your life wondering and using all that energy to find out the truth or if you think you would love him no matter what you find out then focus your attention on making the rest of your life with him better.

Answer 7

Marriage isn't something to be taken lightly. You all have to trust each other enough to want to work on the problem. And obviously there is a problem. Confront your husband with your feelings, and hopefully he can be honest with you. I don't feel that you should divorce him because, a marriage is supposed to be a strong union, not something to be thrown away over something that you don't even know is true or not. Also, if it is true and he admitts to adultry, then it's up to you to decide whether you can still be his wife. Good luck.

Answer 8

I would definitely have a discussion with him over this. Tell him exactly how it makes you feel, and that all this has damaged your trust in him. If you want to stay with him, work with him to work all this out. But make sure he understands that he's got to earn back your trust. He shouldn't get upset if you question him on stuff. Be smart. If he's thinks he's gotten away with it once, he'll do it again. You need to ask yourself if you want to repair your relationship with him or not. Then judge his level of commitment to you and your relationship. Go from there. Good luck to you!

Answer 9

Well you should decide if you want him either way - cheated or not. If you keep pressing him he'll be defensive and nothing good will come out. The more important questin is, is he cheating now?

Assuming that you want him either way, I'd tell him that you found out more about this past incident. I'd tell him that it hurts to find out more. I'd tell him to not cheat on you ever again.

Answer 10

You need to decide to either let it go (the whole incident), or let him go. You are tearing yourself apart analyzing this to death. You have too many facts to think nothing happened. Go to counseling and work through all of this, it will help you to talk to someone non-biased. He is just going to say what "he has to" based on what you do know. Otherwise, he would come out with "ok this is what happened"....