my ex had a seriose substance abuse problem, i met him at 15, and broke up at 18 the time of my life when I had many problems and no peers to help me appart fom him. Until recently he has stopped using substances, which has left him with a really nice and sweet persionality, but at times he becomes really paranoid, thse are the side effects of him not taking drugs. He had to give up drugs as he recently got in trouble with the law for pestering me ( he was very mad when he was on drugs, I was not aware at the that time of his addiction) I find it really hard to let go as he has always hassald me since we broke up, I would never consider going back to him, as he has caused too much trouble and pain for me, we have a child together he has no contact , but why do I feel devestated when I think about never being able to talk to him on the phone again or imagining cutting all links? he treated me so badly when he was on drugs, I would never go bk, but cant let go please help thankyou !!
2006-12-01 08:32:18 · 10 answers · asked by sweetlikehoney_73 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It is because you love him, pure & simple.
It is so tough, & I feel so sorry for you, because I think in your heart your ex was the one for you, & the substance abuse has damaged the relationship beyond repair.
There is still a part of you that wishes it could be different, that believes it could of all been so different.
People say time is a great healer, & it is still apparent that you need more time. Surround yourself with friends, family, maybe even consider going to counselling. You have alot of hurt/unhappiness inside you that needs to come out before you can move on.
You will find love & happiness again in the future.
2006-12-01 22:16:22 · answer #1 · answered by Kingbee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a form of being comfortable. Change is hard for everyone, so it makes letting go of certain thing, places or people can be challenging. Just know that change can be good. You'll just never know if you dont try.
Based on your situation, you're better off w/out him anyway. Trust me on this one. I know you care about him, but there's someone better out there that would never make you put up with that and would never put you through it. I've been there, done that, and now I look back and think about how dumb I was to waste my time. Good luck! You'll do the right thing. It may be scary, but it will feel right.
2006-12-01 08:44:56 · answer #2 · answered by Green1808 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was in the same situation once. it was sort of a summer fling, so i knew it would never go any where but i loved him soooooo much. after awhile you'll learn that it's god choice and if he hasn't had you find some way to be together, then he's telling you to move on. hang out with other guys and know that there's plenty left.
2006-12-01 08:38:34 · answer #3 · answered by sexy4everandalways 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not alone-it takes time to heal.Just to let you know-you are not alone.I'm still living with my ex.After 8 years he decided it was over but I still have to live here cus I have no other place to go.Maybe not talking to him is what you need to get over him.You are a special person and keep your head up
2006-12-01 08:54:44 · answer #4 · answered by littleb7503 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that is hard since you guys have a child together, but if he's off drugs maybe you can slowly let him get back into your childs life and see how it turns out.
2006-12-01 08:36:01 · answer #5 · answered by juicy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will always have a connection to him emotionally. Try to move on with you life and find someone who treats you right and be happy.
2006-12-01 08:34:25 · answer #6 · answered by sweetlaughter434 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are simply the miss tress when his drug is the wife...get out now...you have a kid to think of...an addict is an adict...substances..relationships..life in general..i know..i was one..but i got lucky and managed to grab my life back before it was too late..you know what you have to do...did you not wish that your child would be happy and healthy...all you want is to be a good parent..you are..your asking..so please girl...leave him..whatever it takes...GET RID....good luck..i mean that...been there...xxxx
2006-12-01 08:57:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a thing called LOVE. You once loved him, it will fade with lots of time. you will always love a part of him, but you will move on in time.
2006-12-01 08:34:59 · answer #8 · answered by Premo Mom 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's not love but co-dependent.
2006-12-01 08:44:16 · answer #9 · answered by Sunflower 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time heals everything.
2006-12-01 08:34:16 · answer #10 · answered by Webballs 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋