Having a hard time right now — and a lot of posted questions, so sorry if this seems redundant or pathetic, there are people in the world with much worse problems than mine, I know, but it's hard when you're in the center of your own disfunctional mind. I've been having high level anxiety related to upcoming job, decisions, etc, I'm trying to hold it all together but I need to do something tonight for me that would help — I'm kinda in a crisis. It's not just a matter of relaxing I guess, I need to solve something. What could I do? Sometimes it feels worse to talk about it to people, it feels like it makes stuff more 'real.'
2006-12-01 06:22:57 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
You have Performance Anxiety to make it better you
2006-12-01 06:25:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
ivan, i'm sorry you have such a full plate right now. your "problem" is important to you so it isn't pathetic or self-centered to want or need some assistance. most ppl have a hard time this time of the year...there's a lot of added stress. my first thought is if you're in a high-anxiety place, keep your levels of caffeine down (if you drink caffeinated beverages), make a list of the things that are stressful...from most stressful to least stressful. break things down into smaller chunks, that are easier to resolve. maybe put some things on the "back burner" if you can. for the big thing that needs to be resolved, do some "brain-storming" on paper. i usually start by writing the "thing" on the center of the page. then i start writing down ideas...free-style...in circles around the main issue for 10-15 minutes. i take a break from it and then come back and see which ideas fit the big picture for realistic resolution...i know this sounds kinda simplistic, but that's the point...breaking it down to it's simplest form. some things just cannot be resolved as quickly as we'd like them to be...the main thing is for you to do what you can, and not beat yourself up for the things you can't do. try not to dwell and fixate on the issues if you can. i usually watch a favorite comedy dvd too, just to get my self in a better frame of mind. best of luck to you...i hope this was at least a little bit helpful.
2006-12-01 06:41:42 · answer #2 · answered by pirate00girl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like what francesfarmer's said. You should either try to make yourself fell useful by keeping yourself busy or just get your mind off of it altogether by reading a book or watching TV. I find that doing something with your hands really helps. Try a craft project or, if you are not inclined to do so, clean your place while listening to some good music. Going for a walk and getting fresh air usually helps as well. If talking to other people about the subject doesn't help, try to talk to them about other subjects. With regards to doing something about your situation, you could try to take a scientific approach: gather as much information as you can about your potential job, research the company, read books about interviewing skills (if you haven't been to an interview yet). But if that just makes you more anxious, go watch TV or run to get your mind off of it. If none of it works, try getting some counseling or spend your day answering random questions on Yahoo! Answers... Good luck!
2006-12-01 06:44:15 · answer #3 · answered by TD 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I spend a lot of time writing down everything I feel and think, dreams, wishes, all of it. It really helps me sort of "sluff off" some of the weight of my problems. Then go back and read it to yourself. It is amazing how sometimes when you read it all back, you suddenly can see things you didn't before. I would also suggest that you find a spiritual release. Your spirit is just as important as your body. You cannot tend to either one, and neglect the other, and expect to find direction in your life. I am a Christian, but there are a lot of ways to be spiritual. Spiritual and Religious are totally different things. I also think if you are going to discuss your life and your issues, you will be a lot happier if you speak about your life in terms of what IS possible, and what you DO already have, and what you CAN change. I watched this cool video called "The Secret" and while some of it seemed a little bit bit far out there... it did have a lot of useful information though. Basically what they talked about is ... The world (God for me) .. gives you what you ask for and believe in and give all of your energy to. If you tend to think in terms of fears or apprehension, then you are just going to get more of that. If you think in terms of possibilities and goals, even if you have to fake it at first, you will find yourself getting more of that... I know this all sounds like psychobabble, but since then, I have taken care of so many problems that I thought I had no solution for, and I have found that something good happens every day for me. If you want to email me, I can explain it better and at more length, but basically the first thing you can do right now... Let go of everything that has happened up to now.. Behave as if you are the person you hope to be someday. Behave as if you have solutions, and believe in the possibility of things working out. Last of all... emotions... since we were children.. if we cry, what happens? Someone says awwww.. don't be sad.. So we learn early that somehow emotions are bad, and we stifle them, and we think one emotion like happiness is better than another emotion like sadness. That is not the truth. The truth is all of your emotions are good. They mean you are alive and present in your life. Go ahead and feel them, and don't be ashamed of them. Feel them, but at the same time, monitor your behavior... Be sad.. cry all day if you want to, but then.. get up and take care of your responsibilities and maintain your relationships and behave appropriately. Don't be reactionary to your life.. Take action.. be proactive. Look at your life as the big picture, from birth to death.. and don't get caught up too much in the past or the future. You have today, right now.. What are you doing with this moment?
2006-12-01 06:50:00 · answer #4 · answered by Stacy S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know what your living situation allows you to do, but when I am feeling anxious and keyed up, I like to do vigorous exercise, either walking, swimming, lifting weights or practicing martial arts techniques. Try something that makes your body work and tires you out so that it doesn't feel that it CAN key itself up and bombard you with the symptoms of anxiety. It might clear your head and allow you to think more rationally about problems you probably know you have but can't face because of your fear and anxiety. Plus, scientists are just beginning to see the benefits of exercise in cases of mild depression...I think there's something to it! I hope the advice helps!
P.S. I am also one of those people who find that talking to others about my problems just creates new problems and doesn't solve the ones I have. It is like spreading the bad feelings; you're right in the sense that it makes the problems "more real," and it also doesn't help solve them unless the person you talk to is in a position to help you in an active sense.
2006-12-01 06:34:19 · answer #5 · answered by Black Dog 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
go to the doctors and get some help man...it might help calm the thinking down. then when you get out go do something you enjoy and just try not to worry about it to much. I dont have a job right now and it is really frustrating to me but I just try to lighten my mind and continue to look. If i focus on the positives: family, friends, goals, accomplishments that things go pretty well. If i focus on the negatives then i risk slipping into a deep depression which it sounds like your in. Just remember there is nothing in this world that is worth taking your life over.
2006-12-01 06:26:58 · answer #6 · answered by johnjd_cmu 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've always found that talking to other people (e.g. friends, co-workers, other students, etc.) does not always help. Maybe you could meet with a councilor or maybe a priest or minister, if you attend church. You need to weigh all your options and decide what is best for you. If you need to relax, make an appointment and have a massage. You will feel wonderful afterwards and sleep like a baby. Good luck!
2006-12-01 06:29:27 · answer #7 · answered by Me, Myself & I 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm sorry you are going through so much right now. Sometimes things will fall on you all at once. I know, I'm going through similar times. Work out one problem at a time to prevent being overwhelmed. Believe in yourself that you are wise enough and have enough knowledge to make the right decisions. good luck.
2006-12-01 07:20:47 · answer #8 · answered by Mel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Read a book, get into a good (or bad) movie, change the lightbulb you've been forgetting about, run the errand you've been putting off, clean your place, take a nap, talk to friends about other things, buy your holiday gifts. Just get busy, one way or the other. Sorry you're having a hard time. Good luck.
2006-12-01 06:27:29 · answer #9 · answered by francesfarmer 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I often give frivolous, and silly advice to the yahoos that frequent this sight, but I suspect that you are sincere, therefore I have the perfect solution. Get out of yourself! By that, I mean think of others, and don't concentrate on personal problems. I realize that it sounds insane, but when you don't give a damn about your troubles, others will. Give it a try!
2006-12-01 06:40:26 · answer #10 · answered by Proud Liberal 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
just go out with a nice girl that you like and take her out to a nice place and have lots of fun because it will take your mind off of all the things that are runnin through your head and bothering you. Good luck and sorry about your anxiety thing. LOTS of LOVE:)
love, andrea
2006-12-01 06:27:46 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋