am involved with a man in a relationship, But he is divorced since 5 years
His marriage with his ex did not last more than 5 months and he is still hurt...he loves me..but I am not sure
what do u think?
...would the husband still love his ex? even if they keep in touch rarely?
how woul ddivorce impact his new relation with another whoman?
Advice!!!
2006-12-01 03:45:36 · 6 answers · asked by Work For A 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't rush into marriage with him. Especially when you are not certain of his love for you. Wait for about 2 years and get to know him well. Find out more about why he is hurting so much...it doesn't necessarily means he is still in love with his ex. It could be that failure just doesn't go down well with him.
Also, what do they talk about when they get in touch in those rare moments. Is it about getting back together?
Get to meet the ex together with him in an environment where he should be relaxed and observe closely his reactions and that of the ex. It will tell you a lot.
Obviously, you need enough time in courtship with him before being assured about where his heart lies.
Take your time, a lot will be revealed to you.
2006-12-01 03:57:50 · answer #1 · answered by Dazanix 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this marriage lasted for five months and he was divorced five years ago, and only got together with you in the last year or so, I'd think you're in the clear. He's with you because he wants to be.
However, if he hooked up with you shortly after his divorce, then it is possible that he is with you because of the void.
It is natural for him to still feel hurt. And it is natural for him to have a little bit of love. How many people do you love? A person can love a lot of people; but he most likely doesn't love her the way he loves you. He can love her as a mother to his children (if there are any), as a key player in some fond memories, and as a good friend. Do not worry about his hurt or his love. He is with YOU for a reason.
As for how a divorce can impact a new relationship, that depends on the man. It can have no impact at all. Or, he could have learned from past mistakes and is really good about not repeating them with you. Or, he could be paranoid that this relationship will end up the same way, or that you are just like his ex wife.
Unless he has done something to make you think that he doesn't really love you, please don't worry about any of this. Take his word for it if you don't have a reason not to.
2006-12-01 03:52:34 · answer #2 · answered by Pink Denial 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you say he has been divorced for 5 years, I'm sure he is over the worst of it. I would question why did his first marriage only lasted 5 months. Don't rush into anything, have fun and truly get to know each other and don't hold his 1st marriage against him we all make mistakes. What you need from him is honesty and to be able to trust him, so give it time and see if these qualities are in him
2006-12-01 03:55:16 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are one of the first girls he's gone out with since the divorce then you can bank on the fact that you are the rebound person and it's not going anywhere! My advice, move on! My daughter just went through the same thing. She wouldn't listen either and got hurt....again.
2006-12-01 03:49:08 · answer #4 · answered by wish I were 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hopefully he isnt using u as a rebound.. U need to sit down with him and ask him how he feels about u and his ex.. U wont know til u ask right? I know after getting a divorce we tend to find someone else to comfort us... Be careful in what u decide
good luck to u
2006-12-01 03:56:24 · answer #5 · answered by blue eyes 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Five years is a long time and if he hasn't gotten over it yet he may never especially if she divorced him. she got herr closure he didn't. Good luck
2006-12-01 03:51:16 · answer #6 · answered by prettyfroggy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋