i m married i kn wthat after gettngmarried its nt good to have second thought of anybody but what to do if i got it actually i feel i started loving a guy actually he dnt kn wthat i m married but i love him alot and even he loves me alot there is no sexual attraction but heart to heart understanding love and care ,what to do i really want this relationship forvever in my life should i continue?i talk to him all the time my husband knows that he is my friend i talk to him onphone as i really dont hide anything frommy husband ifi knw that there is nothing wrong intentions inside me,what to do to continue this relationship forever ?is it right or wrong?
2006-12-01 01:08:48 · 11 answers · asked by tanya s 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You should let your friend know about your status if he is indeed just a friend. Secondly, if you feel that the relationship could go further than it should, you should cut all ties. You surely don't want to be in a situation where: 1) you leave your husband for someone that can't/won't fill your husband's shoes and more; 2) leave your husband or your husband leaves you and you end up with someone who doesn't desire that which he can now have without a doubt; or 3) leave your husband only to find out that the feelings you had were not as you thought they were. Often times the grass looks greener on the other side; however, we know not how weed infested the turf is until we take a closer look.
2006-12-01 01:15:48 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is not wrong for you to feel this way, you are a human being. It is wrong and destructive for you to ACT this way. You made vows, practice them and respect them forever. Invest in your spouse and not in this non-spouse and you will have a winning investment. You clearly are not doing it while you are distracted with another. If you continue this extra-marital affair (don't kid yourself, that is what you are doing) you will lose as much as you gain.
A psychologist/marriage counselor once told me that she had a simple and effective treatment:
She would tell the spouses that divorce was an option and if they really wanted to come out of this certain divorce on top, to start acting like a prince/princess. Shower the spouse with so much of everything that is good about you that when the end comes it will really sock it to them. They will really be sorry they screwed up when they are seeing you at your best and then you move on.
She claimed not one couple ended up divorcing but reported they had a change of heart for some reason, they never thought marriage could be so rewarding. The point is it wasn't really a change of heart; you get out what you put in.
2006-12-01 01:36:57 · answer #2 · answered by Mere Exposure 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even though it looks natural and un harmful at this stage but it might creat problem for your married life in the future. Talk to this guy and come to understanding that both of you can not continue like this forever and need to go separate routs and not togather. Then why not to separate your ways right now. It will seem very difficult and tough in the beginning but time is a grear healer. Slowly his memories will fade away from your mind.
Also think it this way that the other guy needs physical love along with a truly loving person. It might be really hard for him to get another girl in his life as long as you are in his circle. Let him go if you truly love him. It is good for both of you.
2006-12-01 01:19:54 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
declaring your his maximum wanted female and by pointing out your previous movements right here truly doesnt say a lot about you. What I see right that's some dude walks in into such fairly some lifes like Gods present to women and immediately everyone needs him so the project of who is going to land him is on like a batch of hungry wolves round a touch lamb. And hes no longer all that reliable, come on!. women are like adult men in that they purely pick one element, the excitement of a conquest conquered. You dont love him yet you want countless different female purely needs him because others do to so youre no extra useful than a protection rigidity of ants. Dare to be distinct and dance to a distinct beat and supplies you up being a sheep and walk far flung from from this guy previously you get a STD or something. Now wouldnt that be stunning if it got here about from Mr Irresponsible. I once had a similar situation yet knew that women were no longer a conquest so I enable alot of girls down and am chuffed I did and maximum of those women understand why I acted the way I did. save in ideas, its no longer having what you pick, yet desiring what you've. develop up
2016-11-30 00:26:00 · answer #4 · answered by minogue 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From a mans point of view men and women can't be just friends without some sexual attraction unless the guy is gay, so your kidding yourself and it's not something that should be going on in any marriage. It's just not healthy for the relationship. If your husband puts up with it then he's a fool.
2006-12-01 01:21:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If it isnt a sexual thing I dont think that there is anything wrong with it...except for the fact that he doesnt know that you are married..which is kinda shaddy. as long as you are not hiding it from your husband...I truly love most of my friends...a deep down genuine love, its normal!
2006-12-01 01:12:08 · answer #6 · answered by BiancaVee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something is very wrong if you are feeling this way.You and your husband need to go to marriage counseling.
2006-12-01 01:10:53 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either get it over with and sleep with this guy and ruin your marrage or tell him in a nice kind of way to get lost
2006-12-01 01:12:02 · answer #8 · answered by Joseph R 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are not getting everything you need from your husband
2006-12-01 01:20:24 · answer #9 · answered by gettin it 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
1st u see whome u love more tham if u love ur husband more than u say tht guy tht u r married and if u love tht guy more than u say to ur husband tht u love him.
2006-12-01 01:15:51 · answer #10 · answered by Shashank Agrawal 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋