How do I help my husband to loose weight and drink less?

Question

My native-German husband is 36, six foot, and weighs 270 lbs. He has high BP and is pre-diabetic. Five years ago when we were engaged, he was 190. He cooks and eats what he wants, drinks about 4 to 6 drinks an evening - up to 18 drinks on a weekend day. He has food binges late at night while watching violent movies after I go to bed. When we got married, my impression of him was of an active, outdoor kind of guy who was into lifelong fitness. Not one to nag, I've recently tried to be helpful with, "I love you and want you to be well", do it for our son, healthy food suggestions, be inspired by his father's own efforts, enlisting help from his brother as a 'gym buddy', trying to do active things together, modelling good behavior, etc. Zip. BTW, I'v also asked him to get help with his drinking and he insists he doesn't have a problem. At a rough spot in our marriage, I tried ultimatums. Funny thing, he also makes fun of other fat people we know and of me doing yoga. HELP!

Answer 1

Take over her meals and start cooking for him and packing his lunch and snacks........then work on his drinking

Answer 2

I think the problem is deeper than just his drinking and his eating and watching movies. How much has your relationship changed since your son arrived? Has he experienced a loss in his life or troubles at work or a change at work that is making him more stressed? Be a friend to him from now on and see if he eventually opens up... being his friend and doing things together might change him for the better. SEE WHAT'S UP...

Answer 3

People who make fun of other overweight people are trying to hide their own feelings. I've been there when the whole world was larger than my 5'3"/336lb frame. I was trying to hide behind other people. I had to do something about it. Your husband won't do anything unless and until he is ready on his own. He sounds like he may be depressed. Be as supportive as you can, be careful not to lash out, just let him know that you love him and want him to be as healthy as possible. Maybe you can talk to a professional and find out what you can do so you don't get swallowed up in the situation!

Answer 4

I I may think he is eating because he may be unhappy in him self. Have you tryed suggesting a counselor?. Does he eat more when he is upset? Does he have a job? He isn't ready to lose weight and i think reminding him to do it will only make him do the opposite.
Start preparing healthy meals without telling him they are healthy, don't make him aware of what you are doing. Only shop healthy, suggest you go out for walks just for fun or picnic's bring a ball and have a throw, get his family involved in it too. In the end he will only do it when he is ready.

Answer 5

Alcohol. The Scriptures speak often of the destructive power of alcohol. Noah’s drunkenness brought shame to his family (Gen. 9:20-27). Lot’s drunkenness resulted in an incestuous relationship with his two daughters (Gen. 19:30-38). An inebriated Xerxes sought to humiliate Queen Vashti publicly (Est. 1:9-22). The consumption of alcohol impairs judgment, inflames passions, and invites violence (Lev. 10:8-11; Prov. 20:1, 23:29-35, 31:4,5).

Alcoholism and the depression associated with it often leads to a breakdown of moral inhibitions, indiscreet or violent behavior, or loss of consciousness (drunkenness). Long-term drinking can terminally damage liver, pancreas, brain, or heart. Binge drinking on university campuses has caused instant death. It is estimated there are 14 million problem drinkers in the United States. Half of the fatal automobile accidents are caused by alcohol-impaired drivers. The annual cost of alcohol-related accidents, illness, violent crime, and loss of work time is estimated to exceed 100 billion dollars.

Answer 6

First, congratulations on working so hard. It takes real love to put up with that type of self destructive person. I believe it's his problem and he has very low self esteem. Your problem is that he can't be helped unless he's willing to change and it doesn't sound as though he wants to. Guess the only thing left for you is to ask yourself if you want to waste your only life with someone that wants to live that way.

Answer 7

He can only change if HE wants to...my wife has a weight issue with similar health issues as your husband...as she puts it 'you don't have a weight/ eating issue so you don't understand what it is like'...the scorpion said to the frog 'I have to get to the other side of the lake, please give me a ride', the frog said 'but you will sting me' the scorpion replied back 'it is not in my interest to sting you, then I would surly drown in the lake' the frog said 'OK', so the frog lets the scorpion on his back as the frog heads into the lake, about halfway across the frog feels the scorpion's tail twitch as the frog gets stung, as the frog starts to sink in the lake he says to the scorpion 'why did you sting me, now I will drown and you will drown' the scorpion replied 'I know, but it is in my nature to sting you'........

Answer 8

you can't help a person who does not want it. talk to a counselor or your doctor. and see if you can find what foods are good . and what foods are not. for the PB. as far as the drinking there is nothing you can do until he admits he has a problem. seek family counseling and if he doesn't want to go then you and your child. maybe they could help you in a way to cope with the situation. my prayers are with you good luck.

Answer 9

See a professional marriage counsler and counselor. You have an alcoholic on your hands in denial.

Answer 10

YOU BRING HIM FOLLOWING PLACE AND ASK HIM TO DO YOGA DAILY IT WILL HELPS YOU LOTS
FOR EVERY PROBLEMS YOU CAN LEARN IT ON AASTHA CHANNEL AT 5.30 AM AND 8 PM. WITH SWAMY RAMDEVJI. YOU CAN VISIT WWW.DIVYAYOGA.COM SITE ALSO FOR MORE INFORMATION ABOUT YOGA AND HERBAL MEDICINES OR CONTACT PHONE. [phone], 240 008, 246 737 HARDWAR (UTTARNCHAL)