Hi everyone. Thanks to those of you who answered my questions about my nana - but I'm not the only one who's been upset this week! My work colleague has just confided in me about a girl in another section who he has been friends with for like, a year. He started dating her then cheated on him and dumped him. He's miserable and he's never like that, always sprightly and chatty. We've never really spoken before now, so I was surprised and a little humbled that he chose me as a confidant. I've tried to say all I can, and mostly I've just listened, but I feel as though I can't say enough. What advice can you give me? Is there anything I can do to make him feel a little better?
2006-11-30 22:04:48 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
PS: I realise that there may be some daft answers. I'm married and not interested in dating.
2006-11-30 22:07:29 · update #1
PS: I realise that there may be some daft answers. I'm married and not interested in dating.
2006-11-30 22:07:45 · update #2
I haven't read all the other answers so I hope I'm not repeating someone else's. First I think you're very sweet to listen to this chaps problems. He was drawn to you because you're a good listener. 2nd, I think you should just stay that - a good listener. When he has finished pouring his heart out to you there's a possibility he will get back with her, so be careful what you say. You can only tell him that we all go through break ups and that we all think there's no one else we could love like that. Tell him he won't feel it now but there's a reason for everything. Somewhere out there is the right person for him and this break up is to ensure he meets her.
2006-11-30 22:54:03 · answer #1 · answered by Curious39 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why does he confide in you now? Perhaps because he is attracted to you, but could also be because you seem like a nice person who would listen to him, and probably you're a good listener.
Now onto your question. What can you do to make him feel better? You can tell him his good points, and that it is really the girl's loss. Also she cheated on him first, before dumping him... does he really want to be with someone who cheats behind his back? Even if she didn't break up with him, the trust is hard to regain. The fact about her cheating also does not speak well about her. She is clearly not such a nice girl. By you reminding your friend about his good points, and that he deserves a much nicer girl who cares about him, you will make him feel better. This girl who cheated on him clearly didn't care about hurting him.
2006-11-30 22:13:40 · answer #2 · answered by Lilliana 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Bless him us women can be so nasty sometimes!!!! It seems to me that you are doing the best you can, there really is not much else you can do really! Listing is the best thing to do.
He maybe just needs to off load hen pop to the pub with his mates and get steaming drunk!
Sounds like he has had a lucky escape and he will realise this this later on.
Just listen and be there for him. That maybe why her chose you as he knows you would just offer that shoulder with out being judgemental. Takes a good person to listen like you have.
2006-11-30 22:13:40 · answer #3 · answered by littlebootsbirmans 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Explain to him that it's a good thing he found out as soon as he did. Then stress the laws of not dating in the office, the building , etc.. For this exact reason, if something goes wrong you still have to see them everyday. Now tell him go out and find another one, nothing helps you get over someone like another one. Just not in the office.
2006-11-30 22:14:10 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sometime in our lives this will happen to most of us, just be there for him and shoulder to cry on, maybe you could go out at the evening for a drink or pictures to take his mind off her, he is better knowing what she is like and realising he has had a lucky escape from her, it could be worse he could have married her and had kids and found out then, he will start to see that there are other girls out there who are faithfull, the more he goes out with friends ect and socialises the more he is likely to meet someone nice, i think it is great you are there for him good luck
2006-11-30 22:09:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Its OK to be there as a Friend-just don't get too involved with this-it is after all a work environment,and if it all goes t1ts up,it will not be a very good atmosphere-and there's no where to hide,so proceed with caution!!
2006-11-30 22:50:55 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think being there for him and letting him talk to you is a good thing. I don't know what advice to give him except to forget about this girl and move on
2006-11-30 22:09:31 · answer #7 · answered by Rocky 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he's purely too previous for you presently. once you hit 18 it wont count number. age doesnt count number at the same time as it includes love. im 26 and my very last boyfriend change into fifty 3...it wasnt because he change into "wealthy" it change into because we clicked and cared for one yet another. so as that different reaction above is faux and obvioulsy they not in any respect experienced actual love. love isnt defined through age, coloration, race, or religon
2016-10-08 01:18:04 · answer #8 · answered by prinsh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he is after you now. You sound like a person who wouldnt dump on him.
xxB
2006-11-30 22:06:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like he just needs to hear you say that not all girls are like her... that he just needs to keep looking...
2006-11-30 22:34:25 · answer #10 · answered by Unhinged.... 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋