A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he's in there, the husband tells his wife:
"Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."
To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He wwas whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"
2006-11-30 18:38:34 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
wicked, will have to tell my hubbie!!!!!
actually did lol!!!
2006-11-30 19:33:12 · answer #1 · answered by emboo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wonder what the guy in the chair thought?
One possibility is probably: "O bugger, hope the Vaseline is finished and there absolutely no butter or margarine left either, where is that cuter younger take anybody gay brother of mine when you need him?"
2006-12-01 03:32:58 · answer #2 · answered by Gem of Wisdom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hilarious.
2006-11-30 20:31:30 · answer #3 · answered by ToXiC 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good joke I've heard it before.
Iris asked what Vaseline is, it's a particular make of petroleum jelly!
2006-11-30 18:45:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice one squirrel ! 8/10
2006-11-30 19:35:48 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hahaha. Heard this before, but still funny.
2006-11-30 21:03:04 · answer #6 · answered by St Harpy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Loved it. It is great!
"Be strong honey!" lmao
2006-11-30 20:48:35 · answer #7 · answered by Joao L 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i heard it be 4 but its funny not matter how many times i read it
2006-11-30 19:40:46 · answer #8 · answered by Amanda R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ohhh! I love this joke and I love you for making my day.
M X
2006-11-30 18:46:07 · answer #9 · answered by The Alchemist 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
haha thats very good one of the best ones i have read this morning
2006-11-30 20:12:29 · answer #10 · answered by tjtwix1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very very funny
2006-11-30 18:48:39 · answer #11 · answered by Ben 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋