A big city London lawyer went duck hunting in rural Scotland. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer's field on the other side of a fence.
As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked the lawyer what he was doing.
The lawyer responded, "I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it."
The old farmer replied. "This is my property, and your not coming over here."
The indignant lawyer replied. "I'm one of the best trial lawyers in the UK, and if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything that you own.
The old farmer smiled and said, "Apparently, you don't know how we do things in Scotland. We settle small disagreements like this, with the Scottish Three Kick Rule."
The lawyer asked, "What is the Scottish Three Kick Rule?"
The farmer replied, "Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth until someone gives up."
The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.
The old farmer slowly gets down from the tractor and walked up to the city fellow. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin, which dropped him to his knees.
His second kick nearly ripped the nose off his face.
The lawyer was flat on his belly, when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly causing him to give up, but didn't.
The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, "Okay, you old tosser, now it's my turn."
The old farmer smiled and said,
"Naw, I give up, You can keep the duck!"
2006-11-30 13:41:50 · 31 answers · asked by stone 4 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
He he LoLs
2006-11-30 22:46:08 · answer #1 · answered by Pd 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
brilliant, buddy!
10/10 for sure...........
hav u heard dis one:
A couple had two little boys, ages eight and ten, who were excessively
mischievous.
The two were always getting into trouble and their parents could be
confident that if any mischief occurred in their town, their two young
sons were involved in some capacity. The parents were at their wit's
end as to what to do about their sons' behavior.
The parents had heard that a clergyman in town had been successful in
disciplining children in the past, so they contacted him, and he
agreed to give it his best shot. He asked to see the boys
individually, so the eight-year-old was sent to meet with him first.
The clergyman sat the boy down and asked him sternly, "Where is God?"
The boy made no response, so the clergyman repeated the question in an
even sterner tone, "Where is God?"
Again the boy made no attempt to answer, so the clergyman raised his
voice even more and shook his finger in the boy's face, "WHERE IS
GOD?"
At that, the boy bolted from the room, ran directly home, and slammed
himself in his closet. His older brother followed him into the closet
and said, "What happened?"
The younger brother replied, "We are in BIG trouble this time. God is
missing and they think we did it!"
2006-12-02 07:36:56 · answer #2 · answered by Joanna! 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Nice
2006-12-01 00:24:57 · answer #3 · answered by arpita 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A good one!I'll give 9/10
2006-11-30 22:26:02 · answer #4 · answered by SMK 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hahaha. Silly lawyer, tricks are for kids.
2006-11-30 22:45:14 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nice 10/10!!!!
2006-11-30 21:54:55 · answer #6 · answered by pitbull lover 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like alot. 10/10
2006-11-30 21:44:55 · answer #7 · answered by Gabriel m 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good Joke,
I never heard it before....I'll give you 10/10
2006-11-30 21:51:26 · answer #8 · answered by Dharshi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take that! Lawyer.
2006-11-30 21:51:12 · answer #9 · answered by Chris 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, HA, The lawyer got F#cked over a dead Duck!
2006-12-01 04:30:17 · answer #10 · answered by the Tramp 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i really want to be a lawyer when i grow up. i sure hope im not that dumb.
ps that was really funny
2006-11-30 21:50:35 · answer #11 · answered by the princess of the world 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋