Super Shy Son.?

Question

my son is really shy. i know alot of peoples kids can be shy but my son has been shy ever since he was a toddler. he is 13 now. he dosnt answer the phone, or call people. he dosnt answer questions at school, but when he does he gets so nervous he starts shivering. when there are oral reports he will risk his whole grade just to skip it. he never says hi to teachers when he sees them in the hall. hes to shy to say please or thank you. when he reads something outloud he turns really red! he dosnt even talk to people in the hallway. i dont want him to be shy for the rest of his life. could this be my fault he is so shy?

Answer 1

Before you try counseling/psychiatry, do a search on the internet for Bach flower. There are several of them - they are in liquid form. It is an herb, not addicting, and could be more helpful than you would ever dream. Choose the one or a set that sounds like your son, and have him take two or three drops under the tongue (starting out I would have him do this three times per day). You very well be amazed at the difference in your son.

I am not affiliated at all with the people who make this product. I am not a sales person, honest. When my mom had terminal cancer, I was so depressed that I could not even walk up a flight of stairs. I could do nothing. I laid around all the time. A friend of mine suggested that I try "Gorse". I took two or three drops under my tongue three or four times a day, and within two days I was 50% better. Within a month I was in fine shape. It just helped me to deal with my mother dying. I took Gorse the entire time my mom was dying, and for about six months after her death. I started weaning myself off of it about three months after she passed away. Antidepressants never helped me.

Please don't think I'm a nut. I'm not. It truly helped me, and I view that it was a blessing from God.

Try it for your son. It may help more than you would ever dream. Go to this website:
http://www.bachcentre.com/centre/remedies.htm. And please, if you want to talk to me about this just email me though yahoo answers. I accept emails through yahoo answers.

If you try it, and it still does not help though, then I would definitely get him to a psychologist and a psychiatrist right away, and continue counseling for as long as it takes, because it could affect his life long term. I'm sorry, but this sounds like such an extreme case!!!!!

Best of luck to you,,,,,,,

Answer 2

It sounds as if your son has social phobia, or social anxiety as it is also known. I know because I suffer from it myself. In spite of all the thumbs-down here, it would be a good idea to take him to a child psychologist. Also, does he have any special interests, like sports, chess, nature, music? If he does, maybe you could find a club in your area. It helps to be with others who share your interest. It's easier then to talk with others without feeling so dreadfully uptight. There are also many internet websites which deal with the issue of Social Anxiety, for example Socialphobiaworld.com. Have a look and see if you can find anything useful there. I wish your son all the best.

Answer 3

Blaming yourself at this point isn't goint to do him any good. There are specialists which help people get over their fear. You could even start your own little program. For every phone call he makes, time he says hi to a teacher, or gets in front of the class he get's one point. Then you could give him rewards that he enjoys like money, games, etc, each with different point values. If he has never been out on his own, to a camp or something like that, that might be a good experience as well. I know that when I got away from my family it helped me to become a lot less shy because no one had any expectations of me. My final suggestion is to give him something he can do and take pride in. If building model airplanes or learning how to play cello boosts his confidence as he becomes more skilled, he may not only become less shy, but also make friends who enjoy the same things. Hope this helps, take care.

Answer 4

That doesn't sound like being shy to me, that sounds like some sort of social anxiety.

It's not your fault he's shy because that's just his temperament. Maybe you should try talking to him and see why he won't say "hi" to people or things like that. You can't fix the problem until you know what's wrong.

Answer 5

no it isn't your fault he is really shy. I was shy from when I was 3 to 15. I got out of being shy by talking to my school councilor in private and he told me to try to interact with people more. That's why I got into sports. I got out of being shy by interacting with more people.

Answer 6

It could be that he is afraid that no one will like him so he avoids conversation or public speaking. Maybe he is afraid of embarrassment. Just ask him if something embarrassing happend @ school or talk in of what i've told you. It may reassure him enough to be more social.

Answer 7

im 43 yrs old, and i was exactly like that untill i was about 20 yrs old. and my daughter was like that, shes 19 now,and still she will whisper in my ear what she wants when we are at a resturaunt, and i have to give the order, and she wont call lots of people like the doctors office or my brothers or sister. but shes gotten alot better, it used to be much worse, it just takes time, let him go ay his own pace, he will be fine. dont push him.

Answer 8

Its prolly not your fault but it could be genetics. I would suggest taking him to a therapist or psychologist they will really be able to help!

Answer 9

you should of got him help alot earlier, this must be terrible for him, i doubt it is your fault it started, its sounds like a social phobia, maybe see a councillor, its would be a great start..

Answer 10

It could be social phobia or some other condition. You should take him to a psychologist to find out.