our family (mainly my grandmother), and my family can seem pushy, will not listen, and always wants their ways...what are some ways to deal with this? Thank you in advance.
2006-11-30 11:19:14 · 7 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Wow....are we related?
My answer was to move away at 17....kinda snuck out of the house and moved in with my new college friends....But I didn't go nuts with drugs or booze and mess my life away in loser fashion.
Boy though, the leaving.... that went over like a ton of bricks. Grandma is the true matriarch and everyone cows to her. Mom never stood up, and dad still there, but resented it. Still does. Got a brother still there, never left, and two others who are users and blame the world for all their problems...world apparently owes them a living.
Me.... I stuck to my guns and stayed gone. Worked my own way through college. Got a job after grad. Now I'm 40 and going strong...and go figure. I have the stabliest job history, highest paying job of anyone ever in my family, my own house, etc..
I'm the one Grandma now turns to for advice on stuff. ( I'm even her trustee and executor) Go figure.
Be your own person is my advice, stick to your plan for your life. It's your life. Maybe a little distance ( not a complete cut off) is required. I still called and visited family, just didn't give in to the pressure to return. I'd just nod, smile, and ignore.
2006-11-30 11:31:49 · answer #1 · answered by L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I just came home from the hospital after a very serious depression. NObody depresses me like my mom. She never says anythign positive..it's always negative..I am bad cook, housekeeper, daughter, person..she doesn't like my religious choices, I am trying to kill my dog..She called me in the hospital and for 30 minutes..she didn't ask how I was...it was just 'you are pathetic, you are rotten, you are this, you are that...(no wonder I am depressed)..My therapist finally told me...for me to have good mental and physical health I have to get rid of the "poison" in my life even if that means NEVER talkiing to my family again. As bad as it hurts me to do that...I may have to...My grandparents, aunt, etc are worse than she is. I am 37 and the more I tell her she hurts me, the more she does it and she doesn't care..She always has to have things her way...it's her way and I am ALWAYS wrong...even if she is wrong..I am wrong. It's a hard decision but if your family is making you upset and depressed , you don't need them...Time is too precious to live your life listening to things like that...If you can't talk to them write them a letter or just stop answering the phone...they will hopefully get the message. Good Luck..if you want to talk..e-mail. If you come up with a better solution.. let me know
2006-11-30 14:56:12 · answer #2 · answered by chilover 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
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2016-10-08 00:52:53 · answer #3 · answered by jeudy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not speak to anyone who does not show you the respect you deserve. If someone begins to talk down to you or act controlling, be firm and say "I do not like what you are doing", if they continue then say "Goodbye ive had enough". Then if they start rattling off garbage behind your back to other family members, spread the word that you will not be having any contact with people who lack social skills, and who do not know the meaning of respect.
2006-11-30 11:23:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
If you are doing what right in your heart. And not a screw up or anything then there is no reason for them to be so pushy. Try helping them understand that you are doing whats right for you and to please be patient with you as you try and make your way through life.
2006-11-30 11:26:00 · answer #5 · answered by HDGranny 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Praise your mother for the good job she did raising you and for the knowledge that she has passed onto you! Communicate that you know how much she wants to help you. Then see what happens!
2006-11-30 14:39:47 · answer #6 · answered by Sergeant 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Push back.
2006-11-30 11:32:26 · answer #7 · answered by cybefree 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋