2006-11-30 07:36:48 · 27 answers · asked by Aaron B 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
Mary:Do you smoke after sex,Jane?
Jane:I don't know,i've never looked!
2006-11-30 07:45:00 · answer #1 · answered by michael k 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nervously pacing up and down a hospital corridor, a man waits as his wife gives birth to their first child. After a long labour the doctor comes out and tells the man that he is the father of a baby boy. The man is overjoyed, and rushes in to his wife who smiles weakly and gives him the child. Overcome, the tearful father asks the midwife if there is anything he can do to help. Sensing that the dad wants to share in the occasion the midwife tells him to take the baby and bathe it next door. After a few minutes the midwife pops in to see how the man is getting on. She jumps back in dismay when she sees what the new dad is doing. He has two fingers firmly lodged up the infant's nose and is dragging the child through the water in figure-of-eights. "Good God!" she shouts. "That's not how you bathe a baby!"
He called back, "It is when the water is this bloody hot!"
2006-12-02 08:05:42 · answer #2 · answered by miz Destiny 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Always marry a girl with small hands--It makes your dick look bigger.
What's the similarity between a Hepatitis B injection and sex with a useless man?
A quick,short prick in the bum and it's all over.
What's pink and hard first thing in the morning?
The Financial Times crossword.
What lives in a hole and only comes out for food and sex?
Your tongue.
2006-11-30 20:02:59 · answer #3 · answered by the gunners 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
hey this joke is proper long but its good.
there was a englishman, irishman,scotishman and a indian. the englishman says to all the men i want to set a challenge who ever can stay in the room with the flies for the longest is the winner so all the men shake hands and go for it. first the englishman goes in after 1 minute he comes out screaming saying it hurts to much, the irishman goes in after 1 minute he comes out screaming sayin it hurts to much, the scotishman goes in after 1 minute he comes out screaming sayin it hurts to much, then the indian goes in what he does is shits in one corner of the room and go to an other
(if u dont get the joke u never will lol)
2006-11-30 16:46:54 · answer #4 · answered by poolgenius_2006 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
its more than one line but...
roses are red, violets are blue,
sugar is sweet and so are you.
The roses are wilting, the violets are dead
the sugar bowls empty, just like your head...
and another
there were two muffins in the oven one muffin turned to the other muffin and said "whoa it sure is hot in here!" the other muffin turned in amazement and said "whoa look a talking muffin!"
2006-11-30 16:02:50 · answer #5 · answered by harpist_freak 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Whats Pink and wrinkled and hangs out Grandads trousers?
A. Grandma!
2006-11-30 15:44:39 · answer #6 · answered by poetikliesense 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Here is one my brother-in-law said about a particularly un-attractive girl that walked past...... If beauty is skin deep, she must have her face on inside out. Not nice, i know, but it was sooooo funny
2006-11-30 16:29:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Smack=punchline?
2006-11-30 15:38:32 · answer #8 · answered by cruiseman111111 1 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Why is it not easy working for the Inland Revenue?
Because it is a taxing position.
2006-11-30 15:48:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cherie Blair is good looking
2006-11-30 16:05:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try FHM bar room jokes some are a bit rude though
2006-11-30 15:44:28 · answer #11 · answered by micknodlew 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋