depression?

Question

iv been depressed for a while and although my bf has been supportive he now gives the impression he is really fed up with it, i cant help it so wat can i do? talking to him gets me no where.

Im taking all the right steps for depression by the way:)

Answer 1

It's very difficult for some people to understand depression when they have never suffered with it themselves.

If your b/f is showing signs of getting fed up, seriously consider ending the relationship for your own good. When you are feeling like you do, you are going to need people around who understand and sympathise, not critisize.

If you stay with the b/f you have, in my opinion you will begin to feel even worse than you do now,because you will start to feel quilty about being depressed.

Get yourself well, that's the most important thing for you at the moment,then worry about b/f's. You won't be able to sustain a good relationship with someone until you feel more confident and better in yourself.


God luck and god bless.

Answer 2

so what are all the right steps? Being so vague in the question doesn't help people offer advice.
I have suffered from depression for decades. You can either deal with it properly or make a big deal about it. Luckily I now live alone so nobody has to put up with me when I am in a depressive period. I can withdraw into myself, spend time reading or gardening by myself and take my St Johns wort tablets until it passes. I can easily imagine someone getting fed up with me when I was on a 'downer'. It would help if your bf backed off a little while you were 'down' and left you to sort yourself out. It is hard to understand depression if you have never suffered from it yourself I think.
Perhaps I am just of an older generation when I never expected or demanded 'support', didn't make a big deal out of it and simply got on with it and coped in my own way. I am very very lucky in that I have many good friends who accept my depression and once I have explained that sometimes I simply want to be left in peace for a few days to cope with it all, they are very understanding and simply leave me to it, knowing that should I ever be in need I will call them, and when I am on my way out of 'the black hole' I get in touch again and am my normal sunny cheerful self again, until the next time I go down under the black cloud.
Decide how YOU are going to cope with the periods of deep depression, talk to your bf about it and how you will be copeing. You may be best on your own. In any case, there is little HE can do to alleviate the symptoms or make it better. I personally don't see HOW the poor chap is supposed to be supportive of something he has no experience of.

Answer 3

I can relate to you.

From my personal experience... I think your boy friend doesn't get it. That you are truly depressed... that you weren't in a phase or a depressed state buy you have depression.

He probably was thinking that this would end quickly...

Depression is hard. There are people who have depressed states and there is depression.

I could feel Happy and bad as hell at the exact same time.

When I try to talk to someone (a friend or relative) about my thoughts and feelings... I get the impression that they don't really want to hear it... Not like "get away from me" but more like "I'm tired of this. DO something about it."

They just don't understand. So, that's why I think your boy friend really doesn't understand.

Depression occurs over a (long) period of time... so it isn't something that you will wake up from a week from now.

You are just going to have to find someone else to talk to... Someone who really will just listen... and that's it. or maybe you want more... but your boy friend isn't the one to get that from.

Answer 4

I am in the same position with my girlfriend and kids although my bad days are now and again I think that your reaction is partv of the illness and your partner is probably just as supposttive as ever . I always find having a telk about it really help and my mates are a fantastic cure! I find tryinr to laugh about it helps, but that might be lad thing. I dont do the anti deppresants the effects are worse than thr illness, You can beat it! its like any other illness it does lift!

Answer 5

I should imagine it is very difficult for someone to stand by someone who is depressed because, as you know, it is very up and down and you have to take it day by take. Just try to communicate as much as possible and explain how each of you are feeling without blaming or judging the other. Ask him how he feels. However, as you say you are taking all the right steps, well done it can only get better but it takes time, patience and lots of tlc. Wishing you all the very best.

Answer 6

You couldn't possibly be taking all the right steps if you're pushing him..... I know how you feel but you have to understand how he must feel aswell..... he loves you and it ain't easy to watch someone you love being sad all the time..... I know it's difficult hun but try to find somebody else to to talk to.... I'd really advise a counsellor, and he'll come around. Make sure he knows it's not him but don't get too deep or he might end up sad too.... and you both need him to be as upbeat as posisble for the two of ye right now.

Good Luck and I hope you get well soon.....

Answer 7

I have had to deal with my best friend being suicidal and people who spend all night crying and not knowing why i give them all the same idea that i have

You are depressed now so accept it. Your depression won't last forever and when you are happy again you will be even more so than usual because you are over this period of depression

Answer 8

iv been where you are and its horrible,i was on anti depressants for 6yrs and i got fed up taking them so i took myself off them,anyway after speaking to a m8 of mine about it he advised me of ST JOHNS WORT u can get it in any supermarket down where the vitamins are,they are inexpensive and are a herbal anti depressant you just need to take 1 a day but dont expect results over night they do perk u up but u wont c results for round six weeks and work much better thn the tabs i got from the docs..give it a go and good luck xx

Answer 9

I have had similar problems and I have found when I lay off of sugar and processed foods, my antidepressant works so much better. it takes about a week to get the junk out of your system, but it's worth a try. Journaling also is great therapy. God love ya for asking for help!

Answer 10

It depends on your depression it has many kinds of mental problems that sends of endorphins in your body that makes you act differently, like for instance angry, sad, even violent, you should take care of your self when your on constant medications you don't ever feel the depression coming on.