Ever since I can remember my mother has told every single thing about me to every single family member and even strangers. Even private and embarrassing things. I have told her point blank I do not like this, but it is like she doesn't understand.
If I tell her something is completely a secret and not to tell anyone, she still tells my close family members. She thinks that if there is any blood relation that makes it family and makes it ok. I told her that isn't the way I feel and then she just gets mad.
I've gotten to the point where I just don't tell her anything until I want everyone and their dog to know. I feel sad about this though. Is there any possible way to get through to her?
2006-11-30 06:41:34 · 11 answers · asked by zyllee 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Unfortunately, you can't change your mom or the way she thinks. I don't think there is anything you can say or do to change this. I wouldn't tell her anything anymore. I know it bothers you, but that is just the way it is!! Only share things with her you know she'll share with others. Everyone has someone in their family like that. You're not alone.
2006-11-30 06:58:16 · answer #1 · answered by Jenna 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately you've done the only thing you can do which is to stop telling her anything you don't want everyone to know. I had the same problem with my Mom at one time and that's what I did. She finally ask why I didn't confide in her any longer and I told her the truth. I told her I missed confiding in her but couldn't and wouldn't take the chance on her spreading my business any longer. She promised to keep her mouth shut so I thought I'd gradually "test" her. I hated to do it that way but felt I had no choice. I would tell her little things that I wouldn't worry about her blabbing just to make sure and I believe it worked, it took quite awhile but she no longer tells any ones business for fear of being cut off by whom ever. Good Luck.
2006-11-30 06:52:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The key to that is not to tell her anything all. I have learned that only one or two people in a family actually know how to keep information to themselves. Its hard lesson to learn. I can think of only 2 or 3 people in this family that I trust with secrets.
2006-11-30 06:45:47 · answer #3 · answered by . 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You got it right. Don't tell her anything. OR... Make stuff up and then change the story every time. She'll get tired of mixing up stories and others will start to not beleive her when she talks.
Do you need to talk to someone that you know?
Maybe find a internet friend to talk with that doesn't have any connections to your family.
2006-11-30 06:47:16 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
My Mom is the SAME way. I have to be VERY careful what I tell her. She gets off, I think, on gossip even if it's supposed to be private; however, she is an extreme extrovert and is also bipolar. Is your Mom one of those people that just feeds off of gossip? If so, only tell her what you are OK with others knowing. Good Luck!
2006-11-30 06:46:28 · answer #5 · answered by Mom of One in Wisconsin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her that. I don't tell my mother,father, or brother everything about me nor any of my secrets. I don't trust anyone in my family b/c there all gossips. Mom even embarrises me to strangers which is worse then just family members. I try to ignore it and tell myself someday, someday I'll change my name and tell people my family members are dead.
2006-11-30 06:45:49 · answer #6 · answered by missgigglebunny 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are we related? Doesnt sound like you can get through to her. I have a family full of backstabbers and gossips. Stop telling her stuff or make up something so ridiculous that when it gets out they just stop listening to her.
2006-11-30 06:58:53 · answer #7 · answered by crazi_4_eeyore 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, it sounds as though it is not safe for you to confide in your mother. If she asks why you no longer tell her about things you consider private, explain how she has violated your trust. Find a friend whom you can trust.
2006-11-30 06:48:16 · answer #8 · answered by AnnieD 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Start telling everybody her business and just keep doing what you are doing. Don't tell her anything you don't want anyone else to know and find someone elso to confide in. Hopefully she will get the idea.
2006-11-30 07:12:38 · answer #9 · answered by micah z 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
honey ...that is your mother....it will never end....just dont tell her anything...cause you already know shes going to say something to everyone ....that is life.....my mama still does it and im 44.....its annoying...but since i love my mom to death...i just dont tell her what i dont want her to spread....and everything else its ok to tell her cause you need to have something for her to talk about....for entertainment....good luck and go hug your mom
2006-11-30 07:01:31 · answer #10 · answered by mspain719 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋