What should I do when I see a child standing in the seat part of a shopping cart?

Question

I saw a child fall out of a shopping cart seat. As I was turning down an isle, a mother was reaching for something on a shelf and her 3 year old stood up in the seat and fell over the side of the cart. It was horrible! Luckily, the child wasn't seriouly hurt. The mother was worse off than the child. She kept crying and saying, "I only turned away for 2 seconds." I felt so bad for her. Since this incident, I've noticed in stores how often children stand up in shopping cart seats. I want to say something, but I don't want to offend anyone. I'm not a parent myself so I don't know what's appropriate to say. I saw a squirmy child the other day and the mother wasn't doing anything. As I passed I said to the boy, "Sit down, you don't want to get hurt." The mother shot me a dirty look. I felt like I was following them around the store waiting to catch him if he fell. He kept standing up and the mother did nothing. What should I do? I don't want to be rude. Should I really do nothing?

Answer 1

tough spot to be in, I know what you mean, I am a mother of two and it drives me nuts to see that happen, but what can you do? without feeling like you are stepping on toes, you can gently say to the child please sit down so you don't get an owie, if it were me, I don't know that I would be offended or not but in the long run I would be thankful for someone else helping to look after my child..after all it takes a village to raise a child right??

Answer 2

It is a good question, because I have felt like correcting parents before, like...hey! your kid is running up and down the aisles knocking toddlers over! Or, ok, can you get you kid off the shelves I am trying to shop....or how about those that work retail, I am sure you have wanted to slap parents around for allowing kids to unfold every article of clothing that you just folded. BUT, in all honesty as a parent, I think I would be offended if someone came and told my kid to sit down...especially if it comes across sounding condescending or judgemental about how I am raising/taking care of my child. Every parent has a different way of handling things, and each of us feels that this is dangerous, while that is not...but our this's and that's are different as well. If a parent is allowing a child to stand in a cart, they pay the consequence if the child falls out--whether it be guilty conscience, a trip to the ER, or a nasty look from another parent. You definitely will not save all children from all falls, and children fall everywhere, all the time. It's what they are good at, until they learn to balance, buy a skateboard or surf board and call it alternative sports :o)

Answer 3

I am a preschool teacher, and I run into this dilema all the time. I feel like I have eyes in the back of my head, and I seem to notice all the kids doing everything they are not supposed to everywhere I go. All I do is make eye contact with the child, say something like you did, "Bottoms on the seat." "Feet down" etc. Then smile to the mom, and say something along the lines of: "Boy, they sure can be fast!" or "I was afraid he was going to fall." Nothing wrong with being honest. Besides, your main concern is diverting an accident, not the parent's attitude. If you saw a little one running towards a moving car, I bet you wouldn't hesitate to chase them down to keep them from being hurt. Same idea... you want to avoid a trip to the hospital for that child. You aren't physically or legally responsible for that child- the parent is- but you can help. Sometimes as a parent, you just don't see it all. I am always appreciative if another person catches my child doing something dangerous, but there are parents out there who feel like their toes are stepped on. The way I look at it, when it comes to safety, there is no offending someone if you save their child from an accident. You wouldn't feel right about just letting a child get hurt, so don't. Don't worry about the parent's first reaction... once they think about it, they'll realize that you just helped their child avoid an expensive trip to the hospital and come around.

Answer 4

I have a 3 yr old & 4 yr old sons. They are all the time doing things that would make you think "Gee, why isn't there a "Jackass Jr." on MTV? Quite frankly, I would certainly appreciate anyone who warned my child to sit his butt down if I was too distracted to notice for a moment. It only takes a moment for a boy to think of some dangerous thing to do. So, I would say thank you! It's not about the parent - it's about the kid. If a kid is doing something dangerous, go ahead and warn them or stop them.. whatever. Who cares if the parent is offended. Do you know how easy it is for a smart kid to unbuckle a stupid shopping cart safety belt? My kids can get themselves in and out of their own carseats....and Grandma still has trouble doing that!

Answer 5

Now that you have actually seen a child fall out of a cart, you can say "Hey there! The other day I saw a little boy stand up in his cart and fall out! He cried and cried." Then smile at the mother.
The mother probably didn't like your tone. Think about how you would feel if someone walked up to you and started acting like your mother? You'd be like "B*tch please!"
And the other thing is to do nothing. Kids fall out of carts - it happens. Most times it's not life threatening or anything worse then what happens to them at the playground. Kids are tough. One of my daughters fell out of a cart once right onto a cement floor. It sounded bad, she screamed - but she was fine. When you have kids you'll probably be less paranoid. It helps to see the tumbles they take - go to the park one day and watch them!

Answer 6

I think saying sit down or you might fall is all you can do. I get dirty looks from people all the time but I still say it. I know a child that was seriously injured from a cart fall. It's a shame people can't actually PARENT their children.

Answer 7

Personally, I don't that's rude at all. It just shows you're caring. If I were you, I'd just say things like you did to the little boy. Most parents would appreciate it because they don't want their child getting hurt. Sometimes you will get a bad response, but hey, that's just certain people. I work at Wal Mart and I always say something, whether I get a good or bad reaction from the parent.

Answer 8

that is a hard one to answer, cause you dont want over step any boundries, as a mother, if someone saw my two year old standing up I would want them to tell me,

if I saw a child standing I in the seating part of the cart I would tell them... sometimes they may not notice that there kid is standing, like if they have there back turned... you will proubly get some hateful looks and stares, but just keep in mind that that kid could fall and bust his head...

Answer 9

What should you do? Just go on about your business and don't do or say anything. Look, the kid isn't going to get hurt if they fall out of the shopping cart--it's just going to teach them the lesson not to stand up in the seat.

Answer 10

Interesting question, as I have a foot on both sides...as a mother, sometimes a frazzled & exhausted one, the last thing I need is for a stranger who I feel is being unempathetic to start judging my parenting skills...
On the other hand, however, all those frazzled & exhausted moms need to do a better job looking out for their children!
All in all, I would want to be told, but not in a way that insults the job I do.