I'm currently having anxiety in a situation with the guy that I'm currently seeing. I've finally decided to seek therapy for it but I was wondering how many people have that feeling of uneasiness when you're dating someone. You know how with some people you can feel so secure and other's have you on edge all the time, why do you think that is? I know I can't controll what he does or who he sees and I'm afraid that my anxiety will drive him away. Why is it that some people make us feel so insecure in a situation to the point where we are out of control??
2006-11-30 04:19:39 · 9 answers · asked by geminig 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Maybe there's something in his behavior that's making you feel insecure. The anxiety your feeling could be your intuition telling you he's not good for you. We feel safe and secure with some guys because they don't push our buttons. You're anxiety won't push him away, he's not there for you. Trust me I know. You can email me if you need to.
2006-11-30 04:28:59 · answer #1 · answered by joss 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It all comes down to one thing in a relationship - TRUST
If you completely trust the other person in your relationship, you will be relaxed, comfitable, secure etc. in the relationship and nothing will make you feel uneazy and I mean nothing. Not even if somebody with the looks of an angel walk up to your guy and flirt with him. You will know that it doesn't matter what she throw at him, he will be faithful to you and only you. When you find somebody like that, even your subconcius will be at ease.
From what you describe in your question, you are getting on edge for no apparent reason. There is nothing to proove that he is "doing something wrong", but it can be a sixth sense which warns you that he is going to do something you don't like. You are already experiencing the feeling before he did anything wrong. If there are any indicators that he is the unfaithful type, get rid of him now. He will only break your heart.
If it is a feeling you are manufacturing, probably because you are scared you will loose him, you must get rid of the "manufactured feeling" as soon as possible. As you rightly say, it will drive him away. Don't think of the things he might possible be doing wrong, rather focus on the things he might be possible doing right. Look at the good in the relationship, not the bad.
And most of all, make up your mind on the guy. You either will walk through fire with him at your side OR you won't.
AND the most important question you must ask yourself is :
DO YOU TRUST HIM OR NOT?
2006-11-30 04:52:30 · answer #2 · answered by Francois J V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in total understanding of you. I used to be really bad. I've matured a lot and I'm a lot better now (due to therapy) but you have to pay attention to who you're dating. Is he a drug addict/alcoholic? That will never work. I've been with my man for over 7 months and I fell in love with him b/c he's real, honest, and down to earth. No games. He's older too, only by 3 years, but he's more mature than me most of the time.
2006-11-30 04:23:53 · answer #3 · answered by inlovewow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds like to me that you know something is wrong you just don't know how to deal with it listen to your gut if it doesn't feel right you shouldn't be in that relationship I'm glad that you have decided to have therapy because that will help you with your self esteem first thing you have to realize is no one else can make you happy you have to find that in yourself then everything else will fall into place
2006-11-30 04:27:27 · answer #4 · answered by linda y 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It happens to all of us... Just be honest and talk to him about it... Trust me you will feel better about it and you will lose the anxiety...
Good luck!!!
2006-11-30 04:22:27 · answer #5 · answered by Milkywayman22 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds like you are having trust issues and until you trust them ie that they want to be with you and only you --- you will have these anxieties
2006-11-30 04:27:44 · answer #6 · answered by Waterdragon 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to find someone you feel comfortable with, not therapy!
2006-11-30 04:23:14 · answer #7 · answered by sufferingnomad 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i dont know why it happens but it does. maybe try and relax around him, but if you cant then you cant.
sometimes you cant force some things
2006-11-30 04:22:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just take it easy.
The more anxious you are, the more chances you give others.
2006-11-30 04:23:21 · answer #9 · answered by winterjane 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋