Two men waiting at the pearly gates strike up a conversation. "How'd you die?" the first man asks the second. "I froze to death," says the second. "That's awful, how does it feel to freeze to death?" says the first. "It's very uncomfortable at first, you get the shakes, and you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and you kind of drift off, as if you're sleeping. How did you die?" says the second. "I had a heart attack", says the first guy. "You see, I knew my wife was cheating on me, so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly. I ran up to the bedroom, and found her alone, knitting. I ran down to the basement, bot no one was hiding there. I ran up to the second floor, but no one was hiding there either. I ran as fast as I could to the attic, and just as I got there, I had a massive heart attack and died." The second man shakes his head. "that's so ironic" he says. "What do you mean?" asks the first man "If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive."
2006-11-29 20:53:00 · 31 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
10 /10
excellent
2006-11-29 20:56:48 · answer #1 · answered by ThE_explOrer 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
LOL. That was really funny.
I got you some
GOOD JOKES !!
Wife: Honey..... What are You Looking for ?
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : Nothing...?? U've been reading our marriage certificate 4 an
hour ??
Husband : I was just looking 4 the expiry date.
**********
Q - What is the Difference Between Mother & Wife ?
A - One Woman Brings U into this world crying... & the other ensures U
Continue to do so.
**********
Wife : Do you want dinner?
Husband : Sure, what are my choices?
Wife : Yes and no.
**********
Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at
your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see how miraculous and powerful I am for you?
Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other
problem can there be greater than this one?"
**********
Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles
and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, But I don't have any worries or troubles.
Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.
**********
Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to
give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.
**********
A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my father
hadn't left me a fortune?"
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you NO MATTER
WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"
**********
Father to son after exam: "let me see your report card."
Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
**********
Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a
millionaire?"
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before you
married her?"
Millionaire: " Billionaire"
**********
Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever.
The guy replies: Thanks for the warning. hahahahaha
**********
A wife asked her husband: "What do you like most in me my pretty
face or my sexy body?"
He looked at her from head to toe and replied: "I like your sense of
humor.
____________________________________________________
BYE - Imtiyaz G
2006-11-30 07:30:53 · answer #2 · answered by Imtiyaz G 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Amusing
2006-11-30 04:55:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Extremely lol stuff.... and it's very well written to boot. It's funny cuz it is possible, just think if it really happened, the women would be minus two lovers. If she introduce the guys and get them past their non sharing approach they would all be laughing. Like you! ha ha do i mean: I like you or they be laughing like you or you share. Thanks for sharing... Cheers
2006-11-30 05:03:34 · answer #4 · answered by Gem of Wisdom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Very funny, a good way to start the day
2006-11-30 04:58:44 · answer #5 · answered by hermionesimpson_granger 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So funny, like it.
But I think the second man will die anyway, he would be murdered.
2006-11-30 05:19:30 · answer #6 · answered by Flyweesh 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL!
I feel retarted cause it took me a little while to get it lol. But that WAS funny!
2006-11-30 04:58:32 · answer #7 · answered by ?Johanna Loves Superman? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GOOD ONE next time remember the fridge
2006-11-30 04:55:45 · answer #8 · answered by Munna Bhai 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
EXCELLENT!!! :-o
Hey u have amazing jokes, why do u appear so unsure about them?
I`ll read them all!!! Give us some more! We want more!
2006-11-30 05:02:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the hillarious one, where do you get so many funny jokes?
2006-11-30 04:55:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋