She's exposing him to guys she is sleeping with. He is 4 and hasn't seen me much in 2 years, but my visitation should be starting soon. I thik it is confusing for him to see his mom with different guys all the time. What can I do?
2006-11-29 12:54:40 · 13 answers · asked by deviatedheart 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Get an attorney and try to prove yourself the better parent. If you can't, then see your son as much as possible and be a good father. He will choose you soon enough if you are there for him at all times, because he will trust you and rely on you.
2006-11-29 12:58:35 · answer #1 · answered by Deb 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't know why he hasn't seen you much in the past 2 years and unless its a very good reason that is accceptable to a judge in family court that may count against you getting custody.You state your visitation will start soon-In order to get custody you need to be exemplary father-supportive and on time with child support and keep court arranged visitation schedule, in other words you have to be a reliable father that is supporting and able to raise your son. In order to show in court that the mother is promiscuous you need to start gathering evidence now-whenever possible names of the guys and so on so they can be subpoened to court if necessary. Just your say so will not be enough. If she is promiscuous and exposing the 4yr old to different guys it hs to be that they are sleeping over for if you two are separated or divorced she can date----But having any guy esp more guys sleep over will be cause for her to lose permanent custody but not visitation if that occurs. If you go to court with this and show she is unfit(promiscuity would qualify for that) but you are not a reliable parent in the eyes of the court then there is a very real possibility that DFCS will be contacted by the courts and if no other relative is available then the child can go to foster care. So my advice, for the sake of your SON is to first establish yourself as a responsible parent capable of caring for him in YOUR HOME or Parent's but you MUST reside there, must have steady employment and must be able to provide STABLE(the same) Caretaker while you are at work either a parent like your mother or Daycare. for you certainly don't want any court proceeding to backfire on you. Good Luck
2006-11-29 13:11:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are doing the right thing. Thank God you're in his life. The effects of all these men in his life can really give him identity issues, not knowing who he should really be like. Stay in his life and try to convince his mother to let you. If she's not being the parent he deserves to have, then you should be the other half for him to lean on and learn from. I wish you the best of luck and you are truly a wonderful man. Wish they made more men like you. :)
2016-05-23 03:39:59 · answer #3 · answered by Susan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nothing. The only thing you can do is hire a private investigator and try to prove that she is neglecting your son by leaving him alone,or abusing your son is some kind of way.
If one of the guys that she has contact with has a criminal record, you might have a chance in a custody battle in court.
A private investigator could find out the names of the people she has contact with,and link them with a criminal record.
2006-11-29 16:05:56 · answer #4 · answered by Dfirefox 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think for one you need to get your other issue's together 1st, like visitation.......was there an issue with the court on this, have you been to court over this, do you have an attorney for all this?
If you & your ex have any communication what so ever "about" your son's wellfare, address the issue with her. If you want to be a part of your son's life, you have to get the facts straight about his homelife in detail before you make assumptions.
To me, you need to address an attorney for any advice, they should talk to you for free about your concerns. Make sure you get your facts straight before you go talking your head off & they tell you that you have no grounds for intruding.
2006-11-29 13:35:02 · answer #5 · answered by yu247365 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not think that you can take your son away from your ex- because she is dating alot of men. She has too have a life too however, she needs too respect her son and not expose him too so many different men.
If you ex was abusing your son or any of her lovers, you would have more of a chance to gain full custody of him. You would also need to have evidence.. Good Luck too you...
2006-11-29 13:00:02 · answer #6 · answered by Vicky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What have you been doing for 4 years? Why do you think you can just waltz into your ex's son's life and expect to be a father without proving yourself? I am so tired of hearing about men who, out of the blue, want to be dads when they have probably put their ex's and their children through hell. Abandoning your child is wrong, and she'll kick your a-- in court. Quit worrying about her dating habits and get your own crap together. Start by catching up on child support, that should keep you busy for awhile.
2006-11-29 13:19:41 · answer #7 · answered by Lisa M 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Unless you want to take her back to court for custody to prove her an unfit mother, you should learn to mind your own business.
Although it IS wrong to bring different men home.. unless those men are HARMING your child emotionally or physically you aren't proving much more to a court then you are bitter towards your ex.
2006-11-29 12:58:05 · answer #8 · answered by iampatsajak 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is not abusing your son, I don't think their is anything that you can legally do about it. You could talk with her, telling her in a non-jugmental way, that your son has mentioned all the men in her life, and that you think it might be bothering him. Don't trash talk your "baby's momma" to your son, or that will be damaging him even more
2006-11-29 13:08:11 · answer #9 · answered by Kellbell 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can take her to court fight for custody, address your concerns to the judge. its worth a shot if your son is around all that stuff, you never what sickos are out there and who your son is being exposed to. good luck
2006-11-29 13:01:38 · answer #10 · answered by Baby boy blue 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋