How do you kill a retard? Give it a knife.
barney's momma so fat when I walked aruond her it was my 100th birthday.
some one went to a clerk and said "how much for a drink?" clerk said "$1.50" the guy said "how much is a refil?l" the clerk said "the first one is free." the guy responded "then I'll have a refill!"
2006-11-29 11:41:30 · 15 answers · asked by Charlie T. Unicorn 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Jokes & Riddles
how bout this:
A boy is walking through a park when he sees Bill Clinton fall into a pond. The boy quickly runs over to the
pond and drags him out. Choking, Bill Clinton tries to thank the boy. However, the boy jumps up and runs
away. Wanting to talk to him, Clinton runs after him. The boy keeps runnning. "Come back, I want to
pay you back! I'll give you anything you want!" The boy continues to run. "Please, anything you want,
you'll have it, you just saved my life!" The boy turns around. "Anything?" he asks. "Yes, anything you want."
Clinton promises. The boy thinks for a moment. "I want a bodyguard," the boy says. Clinton starts to laugh.
"You're, what, eight years old? Why do you want a bodyguard when you could have anything?" "When I tell my
mom that I saved Bill Clinton, she's gonna kill me!"
The leaders of Russia, Iraq, and President Bush met with God. God told them that He would grant each one a wish.
The leader from Russia said: I would like fertile lands and fresh water so that my country would never go
hungry again." God said "Your wish is granted, you may go home." The leader of Iraq said, "I am tired of everyone
messing around with my country, so could you build a 100 foot high, 100 foot thick wall around it to keep people
out." God told him that his wish was granted and that he could go home. President Bush said, "Wait, he just
asked for a 100 foot high wall around his entire country?" "Yes." President Bush paused, then said, "Fill it with water.
A blonde is speeding down the highway when a cop pulls her over. The police officer, also a bloinde, asks her
for her license. The blonde stares blankly at the cop.
"Come on, don't you know what your license is?"
The blonde continued to stare stupidly at the police officer.
"Your license! You know, that thing with your picture on it."
"Oh!" says the blonde, and pulls out a compact mirror. The cop examines it for a minute and hands it back.
"I'm sorry, if I knew you were a cop, I wouldn't have pulled you over."
Two blondes were sitting on a porch in Georgia. One of them turns to the other and says:
"Which do you think is closer: Florida or the moon?"
The other one thinks about this for a minute and says:
"Duh! You can SEE the moon from here!"
2006-11-29 11:45:28 · answer #1 · answered by bdbarry09 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The Israeli way...? What occurs if an insect falls in a cup of espresso? The British : will throw the cup into the line and go away the espresso save for sturdy. the yankee : receives the insect out and drink the espresso. The chinese: will eat the insect and drink the espresso. The Israeli will : (a million) promote the espresso to the yankee and the insect to the chinese. (2) Cry on all media channels that he feels insecure. (3) Accuse the Palestinians, Hizb Allah, Syria and Iran of making use of germ-guns. (4) save on crying about anti-semitism and violations of human rights. (5) Ask the Palestinian President to end planting insects in the cups of espresso. (6) Re-occupy the West economic employer, Gaza Strip. (7) Demolish residences, confiscate lands, decrease water and electrity from Palestinian residences and randomly shoot Palestinians. (8) Ask the united states for urgent militia help and a private loan of one million funds inorder to purchase a sparkling cup of espresso. (9) Ask the United international locations to punish the espresso-save EDIT : thanx gigi & egypty .... any how im no longer waiting for the finest answer i purely got here across it humorous and had to percentage it with u
2016-10-07 23:42:40 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow... None of those were funny in the least bit!
2006-11-29 11:44:25 · answer #3 · answered by Chris C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL on that last one not so much the others
2006-11-29 11:44:10 · answer #4 · answered by thatgirl127 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol the first one and third one are good but the second one is kinda stupid...no offence
2006-11-29 11:43:28 · answer #5 · answered by teddy bear 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey te first one and third r funnay. but te second is kinda dumb. its ok. iv heard it so its not so funny te secon time
2006-11-29 11:59:12 · answer #6 · answered by Eddy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol wow dat waz funny
2006-11-29 11:43:47 · answer #7 · answered by idkjustanothergurl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry.. But NOT funny
2006-11-29 11:49:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um.....I didn't even crack a smile at those stinkers. Sorry.
2006-11-29 13:29:02 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
uh
2006-11-29 12:03:06 · answer #10 · answered by askiluna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋