My 7 y.o. daughter told me that 3 girls wanted to fight her. I told my daughter that she has my permission to defend herself and she was more worried about being sent to the office. I think that the way the school system deals with children fighting needs to be reviewed and changed.
I went through all the proper channels, I told the bus driver about it (everyone rides the same bus and one of the girls sits in the same seat as my daughter) and I also informed my daughter's counselor at school. I was told that the situation would be taken care of but if one of the girls hit my daughter, I should tell her to tell the bus driver or the teacher. I told them that I want my daughter to defend herself and all they could say was that she would get in trouble as well.
My problem with that is this, if I am telling you ahead of time what is going on and even after a peer mediation these girls are still picking on my child, why can't she defend herself?
2006-11-29 08:38:10 · 13 answers · asked by wilsonhutchison04 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
Okay, I didn't say that I wanted my daughter to just start fights with people. I said that I want her to defend herself at all times against all people. Why should she get hit or duck from getting hit and then go tell the teacher or the nearest adult, when that won't stop the kids from picking on her! Where I come from, if you don't start defending yourself at an early age, then people will just walk all over you. I made the mistake of letting her father beat me and she was a witness to that, even though she was only a toddler. I think that it may be in her blood to just sit back and let that happen to her unless I teach her otherwise.
Everyone should stand up for themselves, why are we teaching our kids to run from people and let them walk over them?!
Teach your child to defend their self at all times and in all places. I don't condone violence, but I won't allow my children to be mistreated!
2006-11-30 08:58:51 · update #1
In my old school systems and even the one's I work at now as an adult, a child who defends themselves in a physical attack would not get in trouble. In fact, they could sue the other family.
Those girls are harassing and threatening. I would file charges against the family and against the school for not taking the precaution procedures to protect your daughter.
2006-11-29 09:45:38 · answer #1 · answered by Mutchkin 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That problem shows the lack of education in the country today Hitting is wrong both ways you should have told your daughter to tell an adult what is going when the actions happen not just go ahead fight back. I was sent to the principals office for problems with bullies in grade school I didn't hit back I told the teachers and other school staff that I could find at the time and the kids were suspended an I went back to class now the people who hit back at the bully were "fighting on school property" which is against most schools rules and in the handbooks our schools gave out it flat out said anyone caught fighting will be suspended.
Find out the kids who are causing the trouble and talk to their parents if she can't defend herself without physically fighting she's going to have big problems in the upper grades and after school life
2006-11-29 09:21:31 · answer #2 · answered by topgunpilot22 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I do understand your situation. I want to ask though when does her self defense become more than that? What I recommended for my child was to try to get to someone to stop the situation if that was possible. If it is not at all possible then the next thing to do was to teach them how to defend themselves without "actually having to hit back" - how to block and get out of situations if at all possible. Then if all that fails then they could hit back in defense but only as a last resort.
Also recontact the school, talk to them every time they look at your daughter wrong -- I have had to resort to feeling liked I lived at the school for my children before (Yes I Do Work -- So it was a pain) after a while they will do something about it although sometimes it does take a while.
2006-11-29 08:53:16 · answer #3 · answered by rjsimonson 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think that schools policies on fighting are bunk most of the time. My little sister is still in high school and her male best friend (who has lived across the street from our family since he was in kindergarten) was suspended for defending a mentally handicapped kid. Some kid had cornered one of the kids from the special class and was beating on him and Brandon (my familys friend) yanked him off and then hit him. Brandon got suspended for a week and the other kid just got In School Suspension. In ISS you still get to do your school work whereas when you're suspended you can't make up what you've missed. His parents were extremely aggravated because he was merely defending someone weaker than himself which is what both of our parents have always taught us was right. It was a huge deal but the school would not change their decision. I think in most public schools the rules about that sort of thing should be changed.
2006-11-29 08:57:20 · answer #4 · answered by evilangelfaery919 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! Will, umm she should be in trouble with you, but the Army cannot tell you not to stay married just because she has another mans baby. That is between you guys. However she may get in trouble with the Army if they find out before shes a civilian for adultery which is against the law. However am not sure how they would punish it.
2016-03-29 16:10:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Rules are Rules. I understand the school's take on this. However, I totally agree with you. If your daughter is outnumbered, and the school is not protecting it's students, everyone has a right to defend themselves. One of my core rules is not getting in trouble in school, this of course is my one exception. I understand the punishment passed down from the school, and will accept it, but I wouldn't punish my daughter further. Also I would rise hell about the school not protecting it's students. Have her defend herselve at all costs.
Good Luck
2006-11-29 19:47:29 · answer #6 · answered by olschoolmom 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Thats not really right hitting is a very last resort like if they pinned your daughter into a corner and started hitting her than yea she cant get to a teacher but if your saying you would rather your daughter to fight than her go tell a teacher?????There are better ways to handle most situations than violence. You should tell your daughter that its not right to fight and dont hit anyone unless she absoulutly has to.
IF YOU DONT THEN YOUR JUST ASKING FOR YOUR DAUGHTER TO GET IN TROUBLE! LET THE GIRLS GET IN TROUBLE AND NOT HER WHY LET HER SUFFER FOR YOUR MISTAKES ON TELLING HER THAT VIOLENCE IS THE ANSWER THERE ARE OTHER WAYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
EXAMPLE::::::
Ok..................... if you beleive in spanking which i do your teaching your daughter its okay to turn around and hit mommy and shell tell you it was self defence you taugh me to do that then what you gonna do?????????????????
2006-11-29 09:02:37 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest not hitting back. Nowadays kids will be arrested and put into the juvenile court system if they are caught fighting at school.
2006-11-29 10:29:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she defends herself she is scared to get suspended and get in trouble with you even if you say i wont be angry or anything she may be afraid of them talk to there parents
2006-11-29 08:43:33 · answer #9 · answered by Trina T 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because the school system sucks. Pure and simple.
2006-11-29 08:53:30 · answer #10 · answered by Kim W 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋