I was very hurt and cried on my way home, and don't know if it will ever not be disfunctional.My visit to my fathers and stepmoms home made me sad. You see my stepmother never seems to ecknowledge my children not even a hi.,strangers have more conversation gush over them than she does. She has two other grandchildren from her daug. and son. and showed them so much attention and smiles but when it came to my kids none of that. My sons older and I can sense that he feel uncomfortable, my daugt.18mos. did her own thing even though the other grandchild is 16mos. , i'm very confused on what to do my dad is great and shows his love, but i feel he holds back in front of my stepmom. I also feel very uneasy with her around, should i let my dad know how i feel, should i stop visiting , and have my dad visit me without her. whats right and wrong in this situation.
2006-11-29 06:22:41 · 7 answers · asked by coco1 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I have never tried to make her feel uneasy, I am always cordial for my childrens sake, i offer her everything when they do visit, at least i try , she doesn't even try . i may not give her mothers day or b-day cards, but why should I, she made me feel so insecure about myself has a child growing up. She never had conversations with me or gave me praise as as child or teen. So the cycle continues with my children and it makes me sick.
2006-11-29 06:51:17 · update #1
What's right is simply what's best for your children. If it's making everyone uncomfortable, then I say call her out. Sit down with your Father and StepMom, no kids around, just you 3 and day "Here's the thing...the attention my children receive in this home is far less than the other kids and it's starting to affect my Son. I have values and morals I want installed in him and being in this environment is causing a strain on the family closeness I want him to feel like he has. I'm not asking you to change or behave differently, I'm simply informing you this is the reason we will not be coming around as often anymore. You're welcome to visit them but I insist you leave the others at home so there is no competition. Thank You. " That's it! Be honest, truthful and do the right thing.
2006-11-29 06:30:02 · answer #1 · answered by Dr. Kat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
and if Kat's suggestion doesn't work I suggest you tell your dad that you and the children are extremely uncomfortable when you visit there (tell him why) and you think it would be best if he comes to your home to see them or meet at a park or restaurant so he can see his grandchildren and enjoy them on his own. Good luck.
2006-11-29 19:37:22 · answer #2 · answered by ladygwen 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She may feel very ackward as well, if shes shows affection to your children she m,ight be being disrespectful to her children and grandchildren. Why dont you speak to her to clear the air she may well be really grateful you brought the subject up. Or (I hope not the other) as she shes you and your children as the cuckoo in the nest
2006-11-29 14:32:21 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your dad. I am sure he noticed the difference in treatment also, but don't expect too much - he has to live with her. Try to visit your dad when she is not around. Your step mom should be ashamed to treat children so shabbily.
2006-11-29 14:28:19 · answer #4 · answered by NAN G 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should definitely let your dad know how you feel.
However, be prepared for him to deny, deny, deny. If he does so, you need to stand your ground and tell him that you will not subject your children to 2nd class status in his home any longer.
2006-11-29 14:33:24 · answer #5 · answered by Karen L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have u gave her cause to feel uneasy around you? Answer truthfully.
2006-11-29 14:35:01 · answer #6 · answered by Bongo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please do what Kat says...good advise...
2006-11-29 14:51:24 · answer #7 · answered by lizr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋