So i had a huge fight with my bf and been sleeping on the sofa for the last 3 days and i am not talking to him. The fight was about him feeding a girl we both know in front of me.I was really upset that his being disrespectful and telling me he did nothing wrong and that i should not be mad. HOw dare he say that. Am i being wrong in this matter? Should i even ask this?I just think that something like that should be between us , i mean feeding one another is an intimate thing between 2 people, i will never do something like this.I even ask him would he like if some other guy feed me infront of him and he said NO so what am i suppose to think.
DO i have th righ to be mad? And do he have the right to tell me that i should not be mad? I am mad as hell and i am suppose to marry this guy.he said he done nothing wrong and did not say he was sorry
Please give me some advise to handle this
THANK YOU
2006-11-29 02:23:31 · 18 answers · asked by bcb 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
He was feeding her with his hand under her mouth so that she does not mess on her clothes kinda way
2006-11-29 02:24:10 · update #1
I think you are both in the wrong here. He was a jerk, and you overreacted. While you do have every right to be upset here, I don't think this is as big of an issue as you are making it out to be.
Sit down and have yet another talk with him. Do not let your temper get the better of you. Calmly explain that you feel that what he did was an intimate act, reserved for couples. Not something to be done for a casual friend, especially since you sat there watching the whole thing. Remind him that he even admitted he wouldn't want a guy doing the same for you. After you've said how you feel, then apologize for loosing your temper like that. You wanted to express your feelings, and things got out of control.
If he can't see your point of view, and apologize in return, then maybe it's time he spent a few nights on the couch while you take the bed.
2006-11-29 02:41:17 · answer #1 · answered by welches_grape_jelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, first you have a right to question it and even be mad. But you are severely overreacting. He said he wouldn't want anyone feeding you....but maybe that was the first he thought about it after he had done it. It seems harmless enough on the outside looking in, but how you feel about it, is how you feel. You have made this clear to him I hope, before you stopped talking to him? Then I think he's been over punished. THREE days on the couch, not talking to him for three days....Have you given him a chance to apologize? I understand your anger and disappointment, but I personally think you just overreacted..you should probably sit him down and talk to him and let you both get what you want said out of your systems, so you can stop the anger. Do you think it was something that should stop or even ruin your relationship?
2006-11-29 10:34:57 · answer #2 · answered by flashpro 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay...lets really think about this one. Are you honestly upset about this??? I could see where you would have the right to get angry, especially if the girl he was "feeding" was a stranger or some random girl on the street. However, if he did it in front of you, then that would mean that you knew her and were eating with her too...is she a friend of his or yours or both? Let it go!!! Feeding one another isn't an "intimate" thing...sometimes it can be done in a fun, sexy sort of way...but if feeding each other is intimate, then that would mean you are baring your soul when you eat. Something about that doesn't sound quite right...
2006-11-29 11:19:52 · answer #3 · answered by VAWeddingSpecialist 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be mad. Tell him it hurt you to see that because that is somthing intimate between two people. You can't get mad because he did it in front of you its not like he was having an affair and all right before your eyes. I feed my friends something I want them to taste all the time...it could of been very innocent so just talk it out together. Believe me if he was doing somehting wrong he probably wouldnt of did that where you could of saw him do it...so the fact that he did it in front of you shouldnt be a big deal. Hope this helps.
2006-11-29 14:29:15 · answer #4 · answered by coolchic 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are supposed to think that he was an insenstive clod, because you are right. If this is the first time that this has ever happened give him some slack along with sitting him down and having a little talk with him. If he's done this more than once and you've given him that little talk ask your self how many times do you want to put up with a guy who has no respect for your feelings.
Communication is the ingredient to all relationships.
2006-11-29 10:57:33 · answer #5 · answered by Laela (Layla) 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have been outraged as well, the only other girl I would allow my bf to feed would be his little sister or his daughter if he has one >:(
And he seems to be using double standards with you, since he can do it and not you. I would be even be more annoyed at that than the feeding part.
But I guess three days is a bit long, I guess it's time to talk about it without the emotions, I mean with a clear head.
2006-11-29 10:35:26 · answer #6 · answered by loki_the_ferret 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do believe you are REALLY overreacting. More to the point if you are this upset over something that, while a little strange, is fairly trivial, you should NOT be marrying this person. It sounds like there are some trust problems there if he's banished to the couch for three days for putting something in someone else's mouth. Unless he was putting part of his body in her mouth, there is definitely a bigger issue here.
2006-11-29 13:03:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That is so disrespectful! He shouldn't have done that and you have the right to be mad. Not him. I know what you mean when you say you're about to marry him. But just sit down and talk to him and let him know that he really hurt your feelings and you would appreciate if he wouldn't do that and to respect how you feel. Its all about how you approach the situation. And if it continues to happen then you might have to cut him lose. You wouldn't want him to disrespect you like that after you were married would you?
2006-11-29 10:49:41 · answer #8 · answered by mssweets84 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have every right in the world to be mad! When you feed a person of the opposite gender that means you like them! That's a symbol! He should be apologizing and begging you don't kick his #ss to the curb! Boys can act completely cluless!
2006-11-29 10:35:55 · answer #9 · answered by alexihorky 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may have overreacted (which is why he has become so defensive), but no, he was wrong. Talk to him calmly and explain why you are upset (yes, again). He does need to apologize for not being sensitive to your feelings and he needs to understand what is and what isn't acceptable behaviour.
In the big picture, though, it's not like he kissed her. So put this in context before talking to him.
2006-11-29 10:29:09 · answer #10 · answered by tipper 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋