And not because the father is an abuser or anything, but because they're broken up or the guy cheated or whatever.
Is this not the most entirely selfish thing a woman could do to her child?
2006-11-29 01:35:49 · 9 answers · asked by tagi_65 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
Dear "Gerri,"
Yours is the attitude I'm speaking of. Both parents don't have to "live" with the "mistake." Cripes. What about the CHILD. What do you tell that CHILD when that CHILD asks about DADDY? "Oh, sorry, honey, you were an 'oops,' and I didn't like him very much. Hope you can live with that."
Not telling the father and not putting him on the birth certificate is patently unfair to the child. If the father's an idiot who doesn't care, at least the mother can tell her child, "Honey, your father is an idiot who didn't know a wonderful thing when it happened. I loved you with all my heart and did everything I could to give you everything you needed."
Yah, but at least your way, only one person has to "deal" with the "mistake."
*Spit*
2006-11-29 02:17:55 · update #1
I couldn't agree with you more. Isn't it pathetic how lame these idiots are? I mean come on, if you can't decide weither to tell the man, then why in God's name did you get preggo in the first place you morons. And the poor baby is the one who suffers the ultimate price for there ignorance and stupidity. Unbelievable.
Great question by the way.
2006-11-29 01:48:38 · answer #1 · answered by Third Uncle 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Well I've never been in that situation myself, but I think it may be a bit unfair to assume that the same answer is right in every circumstance. OK yes they should probably be more responsible and not get pregnant but these things happen. My sister for example was having protected sex with a guy that was told he was probably sterile following cancer treatment and she still got pregnant. Luckily they were both really happy and excited about it. But suppose a woman has protected sex with a guy she doesn't particularly want to be with forever and something goes wrong, she gets pregnant. Both parties were involved with the mistake but they don't both have to live with it. In a perfect world every baby would be wanted every parent would be thrilled about it, but this is not a perfect world. Whose to say the child is better or worse of if the father doesn't know. Maybe it's better to have a father that doesn't know than a father that doesn't want to know.
Hopefully you will never find yourself in that situation, and if you do you won't feel the need for any extra help and support. I don't think it hurts to cut some slack to the women that do need that. You can always choose not to read that question after all.
2006-11-29 01:51:42 · answer #2 · answered by gerrifriend 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
I see what you are saying, but I also have come to see their side. If a girl finds out she is pregnant after the break up the guys usuallyy say it is not theirs or they say she got pregnant just to try to trap them.
Honestly if I where in their position I do not think I would tell the father either. I would move away and take care of my new family all on my own.
And no the most selfish thing to do would be have an abortion and murder the unborn child.
And a lot of guys are very happy just being left out of it because they usuall do not want anything to do with the child any way. And when they are so called forced to step up and be a "dad" they resent the Innocent child!!!!!!!!!
Now that is selfish!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-11-29 01:40:13 · answer #3 · answered by hummingbird 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
Here's a thought...don't have sex until you get married. I am so sick of being referred to as anti-choice because I don't support abortion.
Here are some choices: keep your legs SHUT; use multiple methods of birth control; keep your legs SHUT; no sex until marriage; adoption (because I know someone around here is about to throw the rape card or the incest card); oh and did i mention...keep your legs SHUT?
There are so many families out there that want a baby! Why kill a child when someone would love him or her?
Yes I am as sick as you are. It's disgusting. I had my first baby at 19 and guess what? I was MARRIED!! Oh my gosh, what a shocking concept. Guess what? I'm still married and all of my kids have the SAME father!!
Welcome to the "me" generation...throw personal responsibility out the window and sleep with everyone that comes your way...remember this you might be able to get an abortion but you can't get rid of AIDS.
2006-11-29 04:37:10 · answer #4 · answered by robinc1117 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
well not the most selfish thing. my mom picked my step dad over me and my brother when we went to arizona for the holidays and left in the middle of the night. when we woke up there was a note saying that we are holding her back from what she really wants= to do in life. by the way i was 12 and my brother was 14. but yeah thats pretty shity that they dont tell there parents about it. cause its hurting the baby to stay in there and not get the attetion that it needs! considered the stupidest thing you can do!
2006-11-29 01:40:18 · answer #5 · answered by Oh_man_thats_me 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I'm sick of people who can't seem to have responsible sex. What the F is up with that?
2006-11-29 01:39:20 · answer #6 · answered by Jon O 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
how bout u go to maury and tell and how bout sum rubbers and pills
2006-11-29 01:40:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
it is better to tell them no matter what he will say
2006-11-29 01:40:50 · answer #8 · answered by sexy_happy_gurl 2 · 4⤊ 1⤋
no
2006-11-29 01:37:46 · answer #9 · answered by luvbuggies 6 · 0⤊ 3⤋