We were invited to a college graduation party. The party will be held at a restaurant and the inivite states "please bring money for dinner". Are we to also bring a gift to this party? I know it's expected, but I really think a "congratulations" card would be sufficient. If we should bring a gift, how much do you spend on a gift for someone when you're paying to attend their party? I'd normally spend $50 or $60 - but we're going to spend at least that much just to attend. The person is a relative, but not someone we're close to. We see them maybe 2 - 3 times a year at family functions.
2006-11-29 01:27:59 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Eeek, that was quite rude of the host to expect the party-goers to pay for their dinner. If money was a concern, they should have planned a less-expensive party that they could have funded themselves.
But regardless of their error, you should not be rude in return. It isn't "expected" that you bring a gift, according to traditional ettiquette (no gift should ever be "expected").
However, the grad really is expecting a gift, even if he/she shouldn't. And the grad probably isn't the host of the party, so the error in ettiquette isn't his/her fault anyway. So basically, bring a gift.
But do take the cost of the dinner into consideration. Give a card with $20 or $25 in it.
2006-11-29 01:52:10 · answer #1 · answered by Pink Denial 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Graduation Party Etiquette
2016-11-11 07:01:20 · answer #2 · answered by mangiafico 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well considering how rarely you see them I wouldn't attend. When it comes up say well I thought it was rude to ask me to pay for my meal. Perhaps send like a $20-$30 gift. Something smaller then you would have otherwise given. If asked about it say well if I have to pay to attend then I feel I shouldn't send as good of a gift in my absence. Now if you couldn't attend for a real reason, and didn't have to pay, then you send something a little better in my opinion. That is how you determine the amount you give for not attending because that invite.
2006-11-29 01:55:38 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, that's rock and a hard place. When I graduated from college, I, too, had a party in a restaurant. However, the only invitees were those whom I could afford to pay for! Go, pay and enjoy yourself and the chance to see relatives. As for the gift, I would definitely set by budget back a bit.
2006-11-29 01:33:31 · answer #4 · answered by bandit 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do not bring food or a side dish to a dinner party or other event unless the host/hostess has asked you too. The host/hostess has a menu planned and what you bring would not be necessary or even go with what is being served. You might be putting the host in the uncomfortable position of not knowing what to do with your offering. However it is quite appropriate to bring a "hostess gift". This would be a bottle of wine, bunch of cut flowers, loaf of really good fresh bread, etc. The wine or bread could be served with the meal unless they already have chosen the wine or bread to be served. You do not bring a hostess gift to a birthday party. You would bring a birthday gift for the person being celebrated.
2016-05-23 01:44:27 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would skip the party and send a $50-60 gift (as you normally would).......if i'm going to go out and spend fifty bucks on dinner, then i would want to go have a nice quiet meal with my husband...
i think it's inappropriate to host a "party" and then expect everyone you invite to pay for the party......
so either attend the party and bring a card (no gift) ....or
skip the "party" and send a gift
2006-11-29 03:33:58 · answer #6 · answered by SNAP! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It seems sort of tacky that you are expected to pay for your meal when you have been invited so I would say, just get them a card, with some cash in it maybe $20 or a gift card.
2006-11-29 01:48:21 · answer #7 · answered by deerogre 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Boy..that invitation is tacky. The person who sent it has no manners at all. He should have called everyone and asked everyone to pitch in a certain amount if anything. No invitation to a party should ever contain "please bring money for dinner". It's not a party..it just people meeting for dinner.
2006-11-29 02:23:47 · answer #8 · answered by KathyS 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I think it would have been more appropriate to word the invite "Dutch Treat" rather than "bring $". If I were you and really wanted to go, I would just give a card with $20 in it.
2006-11-29 01:55:55 · answer #9 · answered by Jane 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow... how incredibly rude!
If you accept this suggestion that you take yourself out to dinner at a restaurant you did not choose, bring a card and nothing more.
This is not an "invitation" because there is no "host" and the attendees will not be "guests"
2006-11-29 04:36:55 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋