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my ex partner wants access to our children but he wont come if his girlfreind cant come but it has nothing to do with her he wont come to the house on his own he wants her involved but i dont want that have i got rights to keep her away

2006-11-28 23:49:10 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships Family

11 answers

You need a solicitor's advice - it will be a lot safer than trying to understand the legal complexities yourself from a website. Also, if any sort of enforcement is required, you will need the legal help anyway.

2006-11-28 23:51:21 · answer #1 · answered by cuddles_gb 6 · 0 0

This is difficult. Your ex is in the middle of all this. I presume that his new girlfriend is not so happy about how everything is going concerning you and your kids. Your ex is now stuck to try and keep you and his new girl happy. He obviously love the new girl and want her to be involved. Lets face it, she is in this relationship and if he has children she needs to be involved. Would you like it if your ex didn't want your new man to see or be involved with your kids? Neither you or your ex will be able to move on with your lives if your past is always going to cause problems and upsets. If you want your kids to know and love they're father it will be wrong to put him under so much pressure. Get over the girlfriend, you sound jealous.
If you see a solicitor he might give you some legal advice, but i think its silly!!

2006-11-29 01:07:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

It is normal for a mother to say she doesn't want the children to meet dad's girlfriend yet but it is normally a case of "yet". You won't be able to keep her away forever. Usually it's only reasonable when dad's relationship is still new and he should respect that. But if she has been around for quite a while and their relationship is stable, you will eventually have to accept that they will have to meet her. It would be prudent for you to tell your children that they are to be polite to dad's girlfriend, and not encourage them to be rude or nasty to her. Even if she is actually the reason your marriage broke down, your children should not be burdened with these issues, and in any case, often, cool politeness can be more devastating than open rudeness. As to him not coming unless she can come too, as a father he should put his children first and come to see them even if she isn't included. Maybe you can suggest to him that if contact goes well (it hasn't been called "access" for years) then you'll agree to the children meeting his girlfriend. Whatever concerns you might have, you can discuss them with him beforehand and make sure they are addressed.

2006-11-29 00:11:40 · answer #3 · answered by Specsy 4 · 0 0

You dont have the right to stop him from having access to the children but you do have the right to not have her in your home,maybe he can collect them and take them elsewhere. You need help from the family law system to set up access visits but no matter how much you hate him you dont have the right to stop it.The only way any court will stop him from having access is if the children are in any danger and if thats the case you need to be applying for sole custody.Its hard when partners move on and only time heals but trust me if you try and intevene your kids will hate you for it.Look at the positives you can do something with your time whilst he has access and start moving on with your life.

2006-11-29 00:12:38 · answer #4 · answered by blue_eyed_woman_of_3 3 · 0 0

Your rights depend upon your marital situation at the time of birth of your child.

Try parentcentre.gov.uk, it has lots of forums on there specifically about parental rights etc; and answers often come from solicitors and the likes.


ps. to all the do gooders who constantly say that mothers have no rights to keep children away from fathers - this is real life, there are LOTS of reasons why - don't be so judgemental.

2006-11-29 00:27:12 · answer #5 · answered by lisaandmax 2 · 0 0

no father should b kept away from his kids!!.ur lucky he wants to b involved many dads dont have anything to do with there kids through choice and the mums beg them 2 c there kids to no avail so bite your tounge and let him b a part of his kids lives hes moved on and is obviusly happy..couldnt you come to some sort of arrangement whereby she waits in the car while he picks the kids up..shes obviously not a threat to anyone and isnt trying to b there mum..shes his partner now ..how would you feel if he wasnt happy with the kids spending time with you and your new partner..stop being so childish

2006-11-29 00:00:46 · answer #6 · answered by greyhound mummy 4 · 0 0

all the courts are interested in is the children.If he wants to see his children then it wouldnt be important weather his g/f was allowed to visit or not.best thing to do would be seek advice from a solicitor but if your offering fair access then they,ll see him as being petty but if his relationship is strong and she is of no harm to your kids then eventually it will work in his favour

2006-11-29 01:45:58 · answer #7 · answered by Nellynoo 4 · 0 0

honey....he is your ex now...accept his new partner and keep it peaceful....i know it's nothing to do with her but she will be in your kids lives too...to save all the bickering and fighting, just accept her...it's about the kids really, so try not to make things worse by fighting over who's coming and who isn't....be adult about it.....you could always have someone drop the kids off at his place if you don't want her near you, as long as she is good to your kids, then there's nothing to worry about....

2006-11-29 03:28:57 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

You could call your local legal aid society, find them in the local yellow pages. They will be able to give you legal advice and know what they are talking about. Good luck and God bless****

2006-11-28 23:54:24 · answer #9 · answered by ? 7 · 0 0

Lisa i am in EXACTLY the same position as you-its a long story how i am dealing with it - if you wanna chat just im or email me would be nice to talk thru with someone who understands!! naomi

2006-11-29 11:38:58 · answer #10 · answered by sugar 2 · 0 0

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