My dad was extreamly abusive my entire life. Beat my mother constantly. tortured my sister and I. He drank and beat and raped all of us. He went so far as to hold us at gun point near the end. A few years back he wrecked an ATV and is brain damaged now. I hate him so much I feel he deserves this pain and torture. I hate him enough to laugh at his funeral with no emotion at all. He was a monster to us. How do I get over this and move on? How do I exclude him from my thoughts? How do I not feel guilty for abandoning him and never speaking to him when he now has the mental capacity of a 12 year old child? He has no memory of how he was. He crys and calls me constantly begging for me to come see him. Like a kid, but all I see is the hate I've allways known hiding behind those eyes. PLEASE HELP ME!
2006-11-28 23:22:11 · 15 answers · asked by Tha Syko Clown 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
The best answer for you is to seek professional help from counseling...don't trust any stranger you find here on the internet. You have no idea if the person giving you advice is a professional or a 14 year old.
There are Rape crisis or Domestic Violence centers that can help you and cost barely anything. I have gone through one those places and they do help you get through the anger and the guilt. Everything is confidential so you won't have to worry about your friends finding out if they don't already know.
I feel your pain and I'm sorry for it also, but you can get it out of your system...you'll never forget, but you can turn it into something you can live with.
2006-11-28 23:33:53 · answer #1 · answered by serephinadragon 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This may sound crazy, but you need him now more than ever. You need to make peace with him before it is to late. I know he was abusive and you have well deserved hatred in your heart, but you will never be happy until you get this burden off of your mind. This thing will eat at you and probably ruin your chance at a decent life. While what he did to you was horrible and disgusting, the lord says, people need help the most when they deserve it the least. Please take care of this now, for your sake and your futures sake. It will be very very hard and most people will not agree with you or this advice, but believe me it is the best thing. Good luck and take care.
2006-11-28 23:33:43 · answer #2 · answered by iamlsu 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like your father has put your family through an extreme amount of abuse. As hard as this sounds you should pray and ask God to give you the strength to forgive him for all that he has done to you and your family. Forgiveness will ease so much of the pain and hate that you have. In the end God will judge him, not human beings. I hope you and your family can forgive this man, God will take care of the rest. Trust forgiveness really is the best way to handle this. Good luck to you and your family and God Bless.
2006-11-28 23:37:42 · answer #3 · answered by Rooster 1972 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sooo sorry for what you , your mom and sister has had to go thriugh.
The best advice I can offer is for you to get some counseling, I really feel that counseling and time is the only thing thats going to start healing your wounds.
I know your saying he needs you now but I think its best to keep your distance until you can deal with some of these feelings.
I hope the best for you and in time your pain will ease up a little.
2006-11-28 23:29:36 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kind of treating him how he treated you. Get some consuling and learn to let go and make peace with your past. You've learned how to treat people badly from him. UNLEARN IT. It won't be easy but you'll like yourself a whole lot more. Maybe his brain damage is a blessing and if he's like a 12 yr old child why should you treat him as badly as he you. Find some help and deal with this before it eats you like a cancer. GOOD LUCK!!
2006-11-28 23:29:41 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm so sorry you had to go through all that. My only answer to all this is maybe talking to a therapist, or visiting a church. Writing out your emotions is also a good way to "Release" anger and rage. Also tell your mother how you're feeling, i'm sure she wouldn't want her daughter feeling these types of feelings. Good luck and God Bless=)
2006-11-28 23:51:44 · answer #6 · answered by girlpowerart 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well.. um.... i think you should pray about it, if ur the praying sort. Talk to god, and he'll tell u what is best. I think u should forgive ur father, but then again, i was never abused like that. i have been blessed with a wonderful father so i really dont know.
2006-11-28 23:59:42 · answer #7 · answered by Sooo. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't have to go to his funeral. That in itself will be a statement against him. If you have been through all these things, then you need to be in some sort of therapy. You don't have to answer his cries for help. Paybacks are a b****,
2006-11-29 00:48:46 · answer #8 · answered by :-) literary cappy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmm, sound like the Lord has judged him. People of course are unaware of it, save a few. But God judges.
2006-12-02 02:27:19 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not the place for you to ask this question. You should go through your GP for referal to a specialist who can deal with your problem correctly.
Good luck.
2006-11-28 23:25:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋