my boyfriend and i have been together for almost a year and he doesnt know he was my "first" (there is a longer story behind how our relationship got start but it doesnt really matter)-i did tell him i was with one other guy before him because at the time for some reason i didnt want him to know that he was my first, i feel bad for lying and dont know what i should do- should i tell him now or not tell him at all - i dont want him to be upset with me for not tell him...what should i do
2006-11-28 17:06:49 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
no.
2006-11-28 17:09:56 · answer #1 · answered by Paw 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes, you should tell him. You are obviously getting to a stage of your relationship where you are starting to trust each other more, so this is a good time to clear your respective consciences. And this particular fact is not something he can reasonably be upset about, indeed, quite the contrary. Traditionally, a girl's virginity is thought of as a gift she gives to her husband, something that can only be give once and only by her -- that you gave it to him and no one else is an enormous compliment and a measure of how much you love and trust him. Tell him.
2006-11-28 17:19:30 · answer #2 · answered by Bethany 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is it important for you to tell him? Will telling support more respect? Greater emotional commitment?
You will not earn one iota more of respect than he now has for you! If you are marrying him and he has been the one man in your life, then that is beautiful.
But, since this is just your boy friend, what will you tell the next one or the next one? Will you say, You are only the second one, or you are only the third one?
2006-11-28 17:16:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
sunshine: Why say anything at all, at this point in your relationship? He won't be upset with you if he doesn't know about it - right? You being the "first" doesn't mean that you will be his last ! This is the chance you take with a guy !
2006-11-28 17:13:43 · answer #4 · answered by guraqt2me 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Guilt is a killer in any relationship......trust is destroyed for the sake of a mistake. Allow him to understand that your conviction prior to you two hooking up truly is not any of his concern as you where just trying to put a little safety net in front. Be good to one another...you have got out a hidden desire ..let it go...keep your mouth quiet.......allow time to pave your new Nirvana together good luck to you both
2006-11-28 17:13:37 · answer #5 · answered by wonderiswithin 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
its okay i lied to my first about being my first too ...most ppl do. if you tell him he is ur first, guys by nature, will try and take advantage of it...if you feel like you will die if you don't then tell him but if he is a real big trust freak then he will probably bve upset about you lying to him
2006-11-28 17:10:08 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes now & learn to keep some small unharming secrets within your small heart .
2006-11-28 17:14:49 · answer #7 · answered by your noon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't say anything, because if he finds out you lied about this he'll wonder what else you lie about. Just leave it be
2006-11-28 17:23:46 · answer #8 · answered by tyler w 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOU SHOULD HAVE TOLD HIM IN THE BEGINNING. THAT WHAT LOVE IS ABOUT IS TRUST.. IT WOULD HAVE BEEN
A SPECIAL TIME FOR BOTH OF YOU. BUT IT WILL FEEL
LIKE YOU HAVE LIED TO HIM. BUT YOU NEED TO TELL
HIM BECAUSE LIES HAVE A WAY OF COMING BACK WHEN
YOU LEAST EXPECT IT. HONESTLY IS THE BEST POLICY.
2006-11-28 17:13:39 · answer #9 · answered by luckystar 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
don't play games... there's no reason to have lied to him about him being your first... just tell him...
2006-11-30 13:55:42 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Say it to him.
http://sndn21.hi5.com
See URL for more friendship matters
2006-11-28 17:09:15 · answer #11 · answered by sndn_03 1 · 0⤊ 2⤋