I am a guy and for some reason I have got it stuck in my head that I would like to wait until I meet someone special to make love to. Unfortunately I have not found no one yet. Is this normal I am 24 and have never had sex. I feel I will go mad soon if I do not find anyone special. Why do I feel this way I don't know. I wish I could change and go out and have sex with just some random girl. But for some reason I can not I have just told myself to wait for someone special is their away to change this I do not think I can wait any longer. Why is it stuck in my mind to wait for someone special for please help.
2006-11-28 07:09:55 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I am not saying I want to wait till I am married I just want to wait for someone special that is all.
2006-11-28 07:16:40 · update #1
But how do I control myself till I find someone special.
2006-11-28 07:19:24 · update #2
If you truly couldn't wait, you would have gone out and done it :)
In your heart of hearts, you obviously want to wait until there is someone special in your life, and that is a good thing!
Celebrate the fact that when you make love, it will be that - making love. And not some cheap one night of sex which would leave you feeling worse.
I know it must be very frustrating, but I think you are craving having someone special to spend time with more than you are craving 'sex'.
There are many people, male and female, who make the desicion to wait until they meet someone special until they have sex. I didn't wait, and I do regret it. Meaningless sex leaves alot of people unfulfilled - it left me feeling worse than I felt before. This might happen to you too - often you can feel worthless and you self confidence drops after a one night stand.
Do you really want your first time to be with 'just some random girl'? Would it not be more special to wait until you find someone you truly care for who cares for you?
I hope its not coming across like I'm telling you that you have to wait - if you really want to just have sex then you can do that - I just want to let you know that some of who did that wish we had waited.
I don't know if you would actually be able to change how you feel - you are 24 so you are a grown man who knows his own mind, and it is likely that deep down you know you would be happier waiting. I hope you don't feel presuriesed in to having sex - I've known a lot of people who has presuriesed mates 'jokingly' only for it to come out later that they themselves hadn't had sex and weren't comfortable with that fact, and were just trying to shift attention. Mates have a way of making us feel small for taking the sensible route sometimes.
You made a positive descion to wait, and I think it would be best for you to stick to that descision.
If you've yet to meet anyone special - get out and meet more people. Make new friends - the more people you know, the more chance you have of meeting someone who you click with.
Good luck, I hope you can make the right descision for YOU!
Editted to add:
The only way you can 'control' yourself is to think things through and look deep inside yourself so you know what is the right descision to make. Only you can decide wether or not to wait, so if you find yourself feeling like you might be tempted to just go out and get laid, take a step back for a couple of minutes, and ask yourself if that is what you really want. Listen to your heart and your mind, and remember that purely physical urges will pass, but the negative feelings you may have if you have an unfulfuilling sexual encouter can last a lot longer.
Hope this helps.
2006-11-28 07:15:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
i don't know how you can control yourself, but in respect of the special thing, when i was still a child, i found this boy and he was really nice and to me he was special. then he kissed me. he had the most horrible kiss ever, i don't think that i have been kissed that way since anyway, it really spoiled it for me now i'm waiting for someone not so special to plant a kiss on in the hope that it would have the reverse effect of that kiss. i gues what i am trying to say is that maybe you don't have to wait for someone special to come along, even though i admire your courage and total respect for your mind, magical can be with just anyone. if you still feel like you need to wait, wait. if i have changed your mind, remeber durex, trojans, and all the other rubber man friends. put a helmet on your mister and march. i know of a way, she's got to be in this too. kiss a girl and rub/push yourself up against her and it will come, releif that is. still use the condom though.
2006-11-28 11:22:10 · answer #2 · answered by windbag 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tough one.
If you take a chance on a one night stand, you could be dissapointed. Or you could wait for a special person to come along and it still may be rubbish.
The only piece of advice I can give is if you find yourself in a situation where you and a girl can't keep your hands off each other then go for it - don't hold back. More likely it will be the time of your life.
2006-11-28 07:18:35 · answer #3 · answered by Joseph Manners 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm in the same position as u, and now i don't feel alone. I recently met a wonderful girl and we clicked right away, we have every thing in common, she's my ideal girl, but she has a b/f so i can't do nothing apart from be friends (which is okay). But what i learnt from this experience is that there are some special girls out there, and you might meet her tomorrow on your way to work.
2006-11-28 10:25:53 · answer #4 · answered by feelin'good 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with waiting to find that person. However just make sure that you do find the right person and you don't go for anyone just because you feel that you have to.
Once you find the right person you will know and it will be a great experience for the both of you. Don't waste it on someone that you don't care about because if you do you will regret it
2006-11-28 07:35:04 · answer #5 · answered by Baps . 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Men like you are rare! Dont just have sex with anyone! I know it must be frustrating for you, but if you went out and had a one night stand you would probably regret it! Whoever you end up with will be a very lucky woman to have met a guy like you! The fact that you havent gave in at the age of 24yrs says that cheap casual sex wouldnt do it for you, and you would get nothing from it! Dont go looking for the "One" as she'll find you when your busy doing something else! In the meantime, take care of yourself (if you know what I mean) and bide your time! Good luck!!!!!!
2006-11-28 07:31:43 · answer #6 · answered by enigma64 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Good for you!!!! So many men and women get pressured into having sex before they are ready due to peer pressure. Thus the movie 40 Year Old Virgin. It is hard to wait because everybody wants to find that someone special. Stick with what your mind and heart are telling you, don't let your genitals get in the way of doing what you feel is best for you! It doesn't get any easier.
2006-11-28 07:18:05 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
There is nothing wrong with waiting for the right person. You are not alone on this. The girl will appreciate it too, but you will most likely have to date a very religous girl also willing to wait.
2006-11-28 07:15:26 · answer #8 · answered by mayihelpyou 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Relax, the harder you try and the more you worry about it ,the more difficult it gets.Whenever I stopped trying to find the right person she walked into my life.Now I have five of a family .The wait for the perfect mate was the best thing I ever did.
2006-11-28 07:18:39 · answer #9 · answered by Norman H 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Nothing wrong with waiting for someone special. Sex is so much better with someone you love. But you can't force it to happen, you just need to be patient. You need to be content with who you are and the choices you make, and that'll make you irrisistible!
2006-11-28 07:15:50 · answer #10 · answered by Cold Bird 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋