I just lost my children's father. He was murdred. I can't stop thinking about him. Every since I found out I've been crying eveyday. We broke up for some time but he started coming around from time to time. I told him I couldn't be with him because I refused to have my heart broken again. But I wanted us to be friends for the kids sake. I really don't get along with his mom or sister. Since he have a new baby with another girl, they show favortism to his 5 month old son and his older daughter not my sons. It really hurts my feelings because they get along with his new baby momma. Knowing that he's dead hurts so bad. He was my frist love. How can I cope with this and how many of you have a similar story?
2006-11-28 06:00:38 · 5 answers · asked by B.A.P.S 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I'm sorry for your loss. More importantly another set of male children to grow up without dad. There's no way to tell you how to grieve but now sounds like a good time for prayer.
2006-11-28 06:08:29 · answer #1 · answered by beast 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think you should realize that it is okay to be sad right now. You'll be sad off and on the rest of your sons lives but it will be different. You might be feeling guilty because you two werent' together as a family any more. No matter what you couldn't prevent what happened. He is in God's home now and probably very proud of the way you are taking care of your sons. His mother and sister are probably angry and bitter and don't know how to deal with it either. I'm sure in time they will come around. Just concentrate on being the best mom you could be. Send photos of your sons to their grandmother even if she doesn't reciprocate. Talk about him with the kids when they are ready so they don't feel like they can't talk to you about it incase you are too upset. Try planting a tree in his honor and let the boys water it. And lastly do what I do and take a long shower and cry. Get it all out. It is perfectly normal. God loves you too.
2006-11-28 06:18:15 · answer #2 · answered by mom5 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am very sorry for your lose. I would like to say that you can not focus on the attention the other children are getting resulting in neglect of your own child. Your duty is to be the best darn mother you can be and shield your child from any environment that makes your child feel less then special or wonderful. It is hard to understand why adults act in such a way that is unhealthy to innocent children. After all your child is part of their son that is no longer alive you would think they would cherish that. Like I said grieve from your lose the way you know how. Keep your child happy, safe, and away from unhealthy environments.
2006-11-28 06:10:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
First, I am sorry to hear about your lost (grieve all you want just get it out). My advice to you is to move, as far away from his family they are not good for you or your children. If they did not except you then, they never will take it from me I know. You need to move on with your life start a new one far from this poisoning family! Your children will always feel bad around them do not let this happen what good is it to be around his family that show that you and your children are not wanted. To hell with them move do not tell them anything just go as far as you can you will be happier for it.
2006-11-28 06:22:43 · answer #4 · answered by Ms Pollyanna 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As your children get older let them know how much you love their dad/father.
Let them know how much he loves them
For now, grieve, cry and let it all out.
Talk to your children about their dad if they ask or show sadness.
Don't think about the other children he has or his family.
Think and concentrate on you and your children
It will be difficult for your children as it is for you.
Help your self heal by helping your children heal.
I wish you all the best.
2006-11-28 06:22:32 · answer #5 · answered by StarShine G 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋