Four yr old doesn't say sorry and doesn't mind staying for very long periods in time out!!?

Question

my four year old daughter will not say sorry or apologize, she is very stubborn.. if for any reason we send her to time out she doesn't mind staying there for a long time...she sometimes sleeps or just talks to herself so it is not about the place we do the time out in....she doesn't say sorry at the end of the time and most of the time she doesn't move even if we tell her she can....any advice on how to get her to apologize and how to solve the time out dillema.....basically how to deal with a stubboron preschooler.

i tried to apologize in front of her in different situations didn't work

Answer 1

just ignore her, stop showing time out and stop grounding her, stop abusinga nd shouting at her. just ignor her. dont involve her in any participations, dont buy stuffs for her, dont talk to her.

however, make sure to reward her and cuddle her whenever she does any good job like dong her task well and by her own, or keeping her stuff in place. praise her infront on outsiders for her good work but whn alone dont show ur eagerness to discuss.

watever u do keep track of her movements and dont let go. make sure she doesnt knw this.

Answer 2

Make her time-out spot a bad one! She needs to dislike the experience, or it'll be ineffective. If she's staying there, you need a new spot, like a corner, or a dot on the hallway wall where she has to keep her nose or something!!

OK, when your daughter is naughty, tell her what she did wrong, put her in the corner with her hands behind her back and walk away. If she leaves the corner, take her back (a little swat on the hand won't kill her as you do so). Repeat until she stands there for four minutes. DO NOT make eye contact with her until the four minutes are up. When her four minutes are up, get down at eye level and say, "You were in time-out because you did ____. That was wrong. In this house we do not _____. Because you did ____, you must apologize. Say, 'I'm sorry,' please." If she refuses, she gets four more minutes in the corner, even if she relents half way through. Refusing to apologize is rebellion, and you shouldn't tolerate that. When she does apologize, smile hugely and give her a big hug and say, "I forgive you! I love it when you apologize! That's great!"

My s-i-l had to do this a few times to get her daughter to stay in the corner and apologize, but now she stands there with her hands behind her back and apologizes with no arguments.

Answer 3

It would help to know more about your daughter. Does she go to kindy, is she bright or a bit 'dim'.
What place to you use for 'time out' , is it her bedroom? Try the 'naughty chair' , that means sit her where YOU are, where you can see her all the time. Do people say 'sorry ' to her when needed. Have you told her how unhappy and how sad she makes you when she behaves the way she does. If you cant improve on any of this, then, try the reward for good behaviour. On the punishment side, , find something she really likes that you can 'withold' from her until she apologises.,like her favorite toy.Most of all, keep YOUR temper, however hard it may be!

Answer 4

Next time, make it a working time out. Give her jobs to do.

Four is an incredibly tough age to combat, the think they know a lot, and most of "a lot" is how to work Mom and Dad's nerves like a violin.

At four, I had them cleaning thier rooms, Polishing furniture, and lots of digging and planting.

Be creative, but make sure she knows that if she Defies YOU, it will cost Her.

If she refuses to do, or does not complete her "job" satisfactorily, begin to take away objects she treasures. Making it clear that these will only be returned when she either apologises as she was asked to, or completes her "job" to your satisfaction.

I wish I could tell you five was easier. It is easier to get Bill ORiley to shut up than a 5 yr old girl.

Get that disipline established now, or you may become ........Parental..............Meat.

Good luck.

Imagine her at 16.

Answer 5

My little one did that and I found time out was just time for her to play with her imaginary friends lol. I used a form of currency, NOT MONEY but by removing the favourite thing at the time like a toy or a show and telling her she can have it back only when she can show she has learnt manners, my brat found out that being out of turn or rude was not right and started to improve her behaviour within 3 days of removing her favourite toys, bed time stories, sweets after dinner and dropping her bed time to an hour earlier than 7.30pm. She is now almost 11 and I have a wonderful little girl who knows whats right.

Answer 6

i dont have any kid's bt i worked with four yr olds at a day care 15 of them and over half were rude not able to listen because they were not interested in what i was doing in the class.... anyway... if the child has a favorite food like lollypops or even if its carrots.... you eat her favorite food infront of her and if she wants it say no not till your nice and apologize... award her for being nice and doing so... or promise her a special snack... or if she like a book read to her at night say no book and to be able to have her book read to her the next night then she'll learn to apoligize... every child had there own "poison" as you could call it i hope i helped always ~Angel

Answer 7

you are being rediculous ,4 year olds cannot be expected to behave like reasonable people ,that comes after puberty.
where do you get these unnatural ideS FOR RAISING KIDS FROM ,DR sPOCK ,

the Mazatecca Indians beat their babies ,(already at 1 year old )very lightly with a little twig ,when they cry or when they misbehave .
after a while you have only to wave the twig and the kid behaves or shuts up.

these people were incredible soft with their kids ,never hit them or their dogs ,and the kids have a lot of respect for the parents,

when they got hurt ,they laughed
saw a kid lying on the ground blood all over his face ,because he had run into the goal post,but laughing his head off.
we can learn something from suposedly primative people .
get a twig ,and sort out you baby
or he might kill you when he grows up

Answer 8

Instead of punishing her you have to do the opposite and give her 50 cents each time she says sorry and doesnt get in time outs for extended periods of time

Answer 9

four is a tough year better to get her out of that habit now. she should start kinder garden soon . my best advice is to alter your time out methods. use her weakness against her for ex if she afraid of the dark closet then tell her" do u wanna go in time out there" eventually he will realize she dosent want to go .. what I'm tryin to say i guess is that maby she expects your usual methods and that is why she thinks its OK

Answer 10

in our experience, we and three kids, sometimes time outs just don't always cut it . try standing her in a corner so she can fall a sleep or talk to herself. if this doesn't work we would suggest trying , taking away things that enjoys and make her have time outs from them. good luck! never hit !!!!!!!!!!