Is intercourse all that matters?

Question

So seriously, Im at work and i hear some girls talking(i work with mostly girls at an assembly plant).But it pays darn good.Im 21 and they are fairly close in age(within 3 years).anyway I was joking with this girl and this other one who knows I'm a virgin(yeah ha ha real funny but whatever)says"You'll never get laid talking like that." And it dawned on me. Is that all that it comes down to is getting some?Ive always looked at women as a person not just a sex object. But that doesnt seem to work as im still single. Its not that I'm quasimodo. (im 6'4" nd about 215)Just reserved.Anyway is that all that matters anymore with my age group? Or is it just because there, well, in my age group?I mean dont get me wrong sex would be great but thats not what my entire life revolves around.

First of all Im NOT gay. Ive had friends who were but didnt find it remotely interesting. Second I dont see it necessary to treat people like crud 24/7. I dont get some people.

Answer 1

no, it isn't. there's also foreplay.

(just kidding!)

sexual attraction isn't 100% physical, believe it or not.

but sadly, many people (male and female) seem to think so. but if you don't care about the person you're having sex with, it's not good sex at all. in fact, it's terrible.

i mean, why put more effort into pleasing somebody if you don't care whether you please them or not?- you're only concerned with getting your rocks off and nothing more. but it's kinda hard to do that, if the person you're with isn't really into it. it makes you start thinking- what's wrong with me? what did i do wrong? (etc.)

i lost my virginity just because i wanted to get it over with. and i've only been in one very brief relationship that i was in only because i thought he was the first guy that ever cared about me, but he didn't.

that was a couple of years ago. now i'm 21, attractive, single, and celibate. i really miss having great sex and having someone to talk to when i get home, but i'm determined to find someone i care about and someone who cares about me too. i want to meet someone who is nice, fun to be around but not immature, and very intelligent.

if i could go back, i'd have never lost my virginity. instead, i would have waited for the right guy. so consider yourself lucky. the girls at your workplace may have many admirable qualities, but in this case, they are idiots. don't listen to them- the world needs more guys like you. ^_^

Answer 2

No, deffinetly not! But it is great, you'll know what I mean when you meet the right girl. I am 22 and honestly I do enjoy having sex with my man but that is not at all the only thing. With women that just seems to be the topic of conversation most of the time, I know you might think it's crazy but i am a woman so I know. You can always talk about sex if you can't talk about anything else, it's funny, we share secrets, of course like men women like to brag also *smile*, and this is at any age really. most of the time men don't know all the details about a womans conversation just like we don't know the details about mens conversations. but since you work at a place with a alot of women you hear more of what we talk about. Like me, I drive a dump truck for a living just changed jobs was driving a cement truck, so I work around men all day so I know a little more about mens conversations than a housewife( which I was for the past 6 yrs). But men also do the same and when women say that men are worse thats not really true. the difference in that is men will approch a women in any way! ( some women are the same though, I'm just telling you my oppinion. You should be proud of yourself for being a virgin, I don't know but it might seem embarrasing to you and if it does It should'nt!, because there isn't many guys out here that look at women that way they do look at them as a piece af *** and not the person that is waiting to hear fom them again some people are like that! but I think it's better on a relationship if you get to know the person before you just get in bed or the back seat( ha ha). then you will feel a little more comfortable and you both will know it's not just sex they keep coming back for. But you have to realize that now days that is all that does matter to some people, this world revolves around sex 24hrs a day no matter what you are doing , where you are, or what you look like! okay I hope i did'nt get off the subject to much. But yes even when you are in a relationship even if you are both virgins sex will be something that is thought about but not to happen so fast due to fears, religions, and being self consciouse about some things. well i hope this answers your question a little more. Good luck and hang in there maybe you will meet you a nice girl that will be waiting on the same things you are ! hope i helped!
I just wanted to add, my man says sometimes that thats all I want from him but he really knows its not, but I just show him affection all the time that he has never had before in a relationship, so is what i'm trying to say is that just cause thats al you see does not mean thats all there is to it, if this makes any sence to you. You just may not been in an inviroment to hear or see these things all the time but don't get me wrong there are women and men that sex is all they think about and are obsest with it. ok i've got to go now before I type you a book *smile*

Answer 3

Good for you for being a good man and treating women with respect. The type of ladies your gonna see in your environment are generally referred to as factory wh*%#s, and I'm sure you see your male co-workers treating them as just that...hey, alot of them actually like it. That's not the type of woman a seemingly nice guy like you needs though. That's not to say there aren't some diamonds in the rough at your place of work either... but they are few and far in between. Personally, I think the sex is very important, but you have to have everything else lining up to make it so great anyways. There is a lot of emotion in sex, and people tend to tune all that out and pretend it's nothing. Stimulating conversation is a must. A man must spark my brain, be willing to have a good debate about important and possibly controversial topics, and a good cuddle is all too important. Then you have the lazy days/nights when you just want to stay home and play (so many things you can do!) This generation is so different. You have women acting like the traditional men. Stick with what you know is right, there are still dinosaurs out there that share your same perspective on dating and relationships and people in general. Think about where those comments are coming from anyways... do you really want to be intimate w/the type of person that will gossip the next day to all your co-workers?? Chin up young person:)

Answer 4

It's very tough sticking to your guns when people are constantly teasing you about it. I know because I fooled around some but I was a virgin till I got married at 30. You know, it was a little dissapointing to me to know I waited and I was with a man who has slept with other women. Sometimes it would just sneak in my head and I would be turned off or even a little hurt. Don't give in. Think of all the problems people deal with when they have sex and they weren't ready for it. There is the emotional problems, worrying if the girl got pregnant, and worrying if you caught an std. Those are all serious problems that you don't have to deal with. I have come to learn now that the people who made fun of me were really jealous of my courage and will power. Hang in there because there will be some women who will find that very attractive. They will know they have a guy who doesn't have kids with another women, doesn't have any emotional issues with sex, and is clean. Those are all very big turn ons. ; )

Answer 5

It depends upon what you are looking for. It also depends on the individual. If what you are looking for is a quick lay that is easy to find especially for girls. Sorry to say this but sadly lots of guys are easy .More men are easy than women. if a man wants a quick lay it can be fairly easy too. Serious relationships are harder. Most people in the 18- 24 range are getting established in life , making mistakes, and sampling the market. Sampling the market helps to understand others and yourself. Sex is not everything but it is one part of an intimate relationship. Sex is intimacy on another level. Some take this seriously some don't. Men have to be bold and willing to go the extra length, usually its women who are reserved. You can't get to know people if you don't make an attempt.

Answer 6

well I think unfortunately sex is everywhere and so kids even think about it, but it doesn't mean you have to fall into the crowd and give in. Have some strenght to keep your values as they are what makes you unique and special. It's good that you are not in a rush like all the other people that are your age. When you find the right person and marry her, it will be special! Good luck with life! You won't regret it! Waiting actually means no risk of pregnancy or STD or AIDs!

Answer 7

i am so glad to hear you say that about sex . no life don't revolve around sex . first be a friend to a lady and nature will take its course . there is so much more out there than just sex . there is a countless world of life ahead of you . you can be anything yo u set your mind too all you have to do is work at it . i have male frineds that i have never had sex with or anything close to it . but we hug and hold hands a a good night kiss never hurt anyone . a true friendship will last a life time but its like marriage . you have to give it a 110 % on both your sides . you and your frined .
good luck and thank you

Answer 8

GOOD FOR YOU !!!!!!!!!!!!! Do not listen to those ppl..... when you are ready and you meet the right girl it will happen.... yes, there is more to life and relationships than the actual act of intercourse....... intercourse is a wasted action on and with a person who does not care or even like you..... If more ppl felt and acted more mature, as you do, we would not be a world of dying ppl and children having children..... It is not just your generation that think sex is just something to do.... it is all ages..... and if ppl laugh at you when they find out you are a virgin , If I were you I would only smile and say, * At least when I do have SEX, the word LOVE will be included *. that should make at least some of them stop and think about the wasted acts they have done........ STICK to your thinking my friend....... God bless

Answer 9

I don't know you, but the other virgin friends i have place all their value in their virginity. They forget, for whatever reason, that they are a person composed of mind, thought, ambition, accomplishment and hard work, among other things. Before you have sex, it is a big deal because unfortunately our society places such high values in it. For those that haven't experienced it, it is awkward. Women and men are different in their thought process. Women do enjoy being treated like people, but when it comes down to getting some (casual) it takes a different breed of girl. Don't tangle with those yet. When the sweetest, cutest girl comes along, you'll know what to do. Value yourself for what you can do, not for what you've got. (although, holding out until you were 21 is not unheard of, my fiance was 21 when he lost his to me! and, of course, I lost it to him, we're getting married next year, seven years later).

Answer 10

well to some people thats all they base a relationship on now a days and dont care about values and feelings anymore. but some people dont realize that you have to do something just because everyone else is. but it should be something taken seriously and not just for kicks cause it will hurt if taken for granted. but not many people know how to limit it as a high priority or not know how to not make their life revolve around it. but just be you.