This is because they do not want any in return (they "don't need anything"). They are going to get our children gifts, however. I am a little upset about this. I was never consulted about this. It was just "decided". My kids will, of course, be expected to give their grandparents gifts.
I must admit I am a little mifted. I like giving presents and I like getting presents. Am I wrong to feel this way?
2006-11-27 15:23:30 · 20 answers · asked by MizElizabeth 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I just found out that we are expected to give them gifts on their Birthdays,Fathers and Mothers days.
2006-11-27 15:30:04 · update #1
I guess I can't understand how one doesn't give a gift to their own child.
2006-11-27 15:38:18 · update #2
Don't worry about it and don't lower yourself to their level. Get something small for the grandparents from your kids. Stick to your budget or what you can afford. If someone doesn't want to get you a present chances are if they were made to pick something out it would be crap anyway.
2006-11-27 15:53:46 · answer #1 · answered by Kylie 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Of course this is a very personal issue and no matter how your feeling - it isnt wrong. I think that they are trying to be nice (in a weird way). I know a few families that have decided to just give gifts to the kids. I agree that it would have been nice for it to be a conversation rather than a directive, but if it is that important to you - I think it is okay to be open with them about the fact that it upsets you because you enjoy the act of giving and the Christmas spirit and want to continue it. If they still object at that point, then I think you have to let it go and obey their wishes. I think it also depends on how old your kids are. If they are younger then I dont think it is necessary for them to give their grandparents a gift. I think that if they just want it to be about the children - then that is what they will get...
I hope this helps.
2006-11-27 23:31:28 · answer #2 · answered by Smiles :) 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
like the idea of the kids making something special themselves, give them the good feeling of doing just that, chances are the g/parents would love that better anyway or a nice updated photo of the children or buy a gift for a needy and sad child brighten up their Xmas in the g/parents name would be nice. More of the spirit less pressure and poverty for Xmas.Maybe money is an issue for them, just do what you think is right by your kids you can help make the gift and they can enjoy giving it to them.No big deal. enjoy Xmas time with your loved ones,that's what its suppose to be about love and gratitude not anger and greed.My sister and I don't do birthday prezzies but do send a card, we only do Xmas gifts to each other because of money, its easier for her no problem there My mum however would also do something even when she was real poor its the thoughts that went with it that i really loved.Always her biggest kid.
2006-11-28 01:26:04 · answer #3 · answered by deb m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My family doesn't exchange gifts either (except for the young ones) and we like that. The holidays for us is about spending quality time together not spending money. Most of the time we go to a movie, have a nice dinner, trade back rubs or hang out and play a game.
The social pressure of the holidays to buy the "perfect" gift is too much for us. Save the time and the energy and write a nice note.
Good Luck!
2006-11-28 00:15:09 · answer #4 · answered by iftraining 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hear the "I don't want anything, I don't need anything" stuff every year. But every year I go buy craft things and put something together for them, I give them the gift of my time and heart felt caring home-made gift for christmas (birthdays and so on 2). They still love the gift. It never came to there minds about what they got as in needing it, but still love and use them till this day. So if I were you, knowing that you may not receive anything at all, Go out and get them or put something together for them anyways. You'll feel better in the long run and they'll remember it for years to come! Good Luck!!!! Don't let it get to you.....it's the time of year to be happy and be giving....as the saying goes "Put alil' love into it" ;)
2006-11-27 23:38:53 · answer #5 · answered by So you think you know me!? 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
So give them a gift still. You shouldn't give gifts only with the expectation of getting one in return
There is so much more to Christmas then presents. Grow up
2006-11-27 23:25:58 · answer #6 · answered by discmiss1 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yeah selfish. Christmas is for the kids, not you adults. The parents said they didn't want anything because they don't need anything. The best gift your kids could give them is something they made. So go spend $10 on craft supplies at the dollar store, sit down and help your kids make their grandparents something and get your head out of your a**
2006-11-27 23:26:29 · answer #7 · answered by bellbottombleus 4 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Get over it, Christmas is about the thought, not about giving
Your children should not be expected to give gifts,
And if your Parents or Parents in Law can not accept this, Then they should really rethink the meaning of Christmas, It is all about the children, I Love to see my Girls and Grandchild opening presents, It means more to me that anything
2006-11-28 00:10:13 · answer #8 · answered by Shawn W 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
As Scrooge-like as it seems, I think if they don't expect anything, then you shouldn't either. (I know, I know, I like getting gifts too, but there's nothing like the holidays to bring out the cheap-o's in all of us!) But here's my problem, why would grown human beings expect gifts from their grandchildren? Are your in-laws expecting home-made gifts or are they expecting your children to shell out some cash for presents? Now that, I feel, is wrong and improper decorum from GPs to grandchildren.
2006-11-27 23:28:29 · answer #9 · answered by jaded1004 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes you are selfish to feel this way. I don't see why you feel you should have been consulted about it. And there is nothing wrong with your kids giving their grandparents a gift. My grandmother loves getting pictures as gifts, consider your kids doing that. Get over it, Xmas is about giving, not receiving. And you're an adult! Set an example for your kids!
2006-11-28 00:02:48 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
Yeah... you're wrong. Your in-laws dont have to consult you about whether YOU get gifts from them. I think that is a bit selfish. But get THEM gifts anyways if it gives you joy.... but never EXPECT gifts. Maybe the real reason is they don't have the extra money to get you and your hubby gifts. Getting gifts is nice but remember what Christmas is really about.... the birth of Jesus.
2006-11-27 23:30:05 · answer #11 · answered by go_uva 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋