Anyone, please give me a good answer to this!?

Question

I need help. I am in love with my exboyfriends best friend. Me and my exboyfriend are still close but i dont want to be with him. We dated for a long time, 6 years, and he is still in love with me but i do not feel the same way. He cheated on me and has pushed me a couple times while he was drunk. I want his best friend. I wasnt sure if his best friend felt the same way until this past week. He told me he wanted to kiss me and he also told me that he has feelings for me. What do i do? I am going to visit him this weekend and I am not sure if I should tell him or not? HELP!

Do I follow through with his friend or just fall out of love with him? I seriously am in love with him. I have been for so long and now he told me a little bit of how he felt. I know that this is right. I know I could marry him. I am so confused! HELP!!!!!!

Answer 1

i say go for it! i can see how this would be a shitty situation for your ex.. but things like this happen all the time! If you love eachother and its right, then its right. As for your ex, he will most likely be pissed in the beginning, but if hes a good friend/person, he will 1, get over it and 2, be happy for you guys because he should want to see his 2 supposed favorite people happy. thats my opinion...

Answer 2

The best friend is not the issue here, at this time. The first thing you MUST do, is tell the "ex-boyfriend " that your relationship is definitely over. Six years? Plus he shoved you around? Just thank The Lord that you didn't marry this creep, you'd probably be "black and blue" from head to toe by now. The "I was drunk" thing is a cop out. What would be the next excuse, "You make me do this"? Get away from him, first and foremost, then think about who you want to see. You may be looking at his best friend as a "spite-thing"

Answer 3

Woah there! I'm reading a lot of heavy emotions about a relationship that hardly exists yet. Could you maybe take things a little slower for his sake?

You want your ex boyfriend's friend. Fine. He's single, you're single, so it's all OK... Except he's your ex boyfriends friend, so your ex will be mad. Since you don't care about your ex, that's not a problem for the relationship, but since your ex still cares for you, and his friend, and he's been abusive to you in the past, this could be dangerous.

I recomend that you have less contact with your exes. How long has it been since you broke up anyway? rebound relationships can be tough.

I also recomend that you talk to this guy you want about how dangerous the two of you think your ex could be, how to date without getting him too mad, and how serious a relationship you want...

And I recomend that you don't propose to marry him until the two of you have been dating for at least six months. Us guys all look like wonderful husbands until you get to know us a little better.

Answer 4

You really need to think about this one. Are you sure you and the x are never going to get back together? Is the best friend willing to loose the friend ship with his best friend? These are the things you need to know. Is the best friend really interested in you or is he just trying to have fun and make you look like a fool in the process. The fact that the x cheated on you, you owe him nothing, the two of you are not together and he cheated and ended the relationship. Good luck and God bless*********************

Answer 5

Morally speaking... you should never date your ex's best friend. However I do understand the conflict that lies within you. And yes, it is sad to say that you may have to give him up, to save face and keep your virtues intact. He may well be "The One". But it is not set in stone. Show respect for yourself in the face of temptation. Don't let it overrun you. Things may not go as well as might think they could. This could be a game for him. And maybe not. But I don't think I like the odds of that. Do you? Are you willing to take that leap of faith with nothing more than he has feelings for you? There are other men out there. And believe me, in the end, he and your ex will respect you that much more. No matter what, no one can ever say that you took the path of least resistance. You'd show moral restraint. You will have to let that kind of love go away from you. He may deserve it... just not from his best friends Ex. I hope this helps

Answer 6

Your going to lose one of these guys as a friend and break someones heart! Theres going to be drama becuz I've been through this before. I've always told friends that if u dont love someone, then why be with them?

Answer 7

You ex lost privileges to keep you as a girlfriend the moment he cheated on you, so it should not be your responsibility to consider his feelings in all of this. This is YOUR love life and YOUR decision. Go for it with his friend. Your situation is legitimate; you wouldn't be cheating on your ex.

Answer 8

i do not think you have acuatlly defined love. are you in love or just in love with the idea of being in love. if you have to question yourself this way then really stop and think about it. your heart will let you know what true love is. trust me on this

best of luck and look for what the deep down gut feeling is telling you and then do not doubt it go with it!

best of the lords blessing
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Answer 9

i think you should follow your heart and see where it goes. if your ex cared for you, then he would be happy that you have moved on. why give up the chance to be happy in love because of someone you don't love might not like it?

have you asked your ex what he thinks? not that it really matters what he feels.

Answer 10

Time... take your time with this one. Let your ex know you have feelings for his friend, so he isn't blindsided by it. And... wait and see if these are REAL feelings you have for this guy or just infatuation. Don't be in such a hurry! If it's meant to be, it will be! :o)