and i want to change really bad!!!.....
okay me n my b.f been togetha for bout a yr now n we been gettin into alot of arguments b/c of stupid lil things well i ***** at em fo certain things he do n well i think its wrng ... well newayz he brought up tha fact i cheated on him bout 6mon ago and i dont know what to do anymore i realize it hurt em extremly bad n not only him it still hurts me and probably alwayz will b.c he is the love of my life, i put him thru so much **** and he still is here i kno pple gonna be sayin **** on here bout me but i would like to have some positive answers on how to change my wayz and attitude b.c i really want to work this relationship out..i still am tryin to chang so hard but i need help
2006-11-27 14:45:42 · 9 answers · asked by babibear20 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Taking English lessons might help,then he could understand what you're saying.
2006-11-27 14:51:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you could cheat on him, then he is not the love of your life. The love of your life is still waiting. You shouldnt have to change your personality to make another person happy. True love is accepting, it is pure. A person who trully loves you wont want you to change...they will love you exactly for who you are. Maybe you cheated on him because he wants to change you, wants to control you. Maybe he is very controlling and he has made you feel unworthy....maybe thats why you cheated. You need to look at the reasons why you cheated in order to work out whether you have the problem or it is him who has the problem. Personally I think he has the problem, honestly, you wouldnt have cheated on him if there wasnt a problem. And if he loved you enough he wouldnt want you to change. Maybe its him who needs to do a bit of changing to make you happy. Why should you have to do all the changing to make him happy? Love is supposed to be equal and in your case it doesnt appear to be that way. Why dont you let him go and find someone who can love you for exactly who you are. Let him find what he is really looking for without putting the girl through so much stress to mould her into something he expects. You dont have to change to keep him. If he loved you he would accept you for who you are.....there is a guy out there who is perfect for you. Rid yourself of his control and allow you to be who you want to be. Find your self esteem again because I get the impression he has taken a lot away from you.
I wish you well. You are beautiful just the way you are...dont let him tell you any differently.
2006-11-27 14:55:33 · answer #2 · answered by rightio 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What was done six months ago is now in the past. But it will never go away until your boyfriend is able to heal from the wound your cheating has caused.
You can't move forward until you face and deal with the issues at hand.
Secondly, you can't change yourself to try and keep a man. If he wants to leave he is going to leave. And if he wants to stay then he is going to have to accept what took place.
The best thing I can advise you to do, is have a heart to heart talk with your bf and find out why he wants to leave. This is the first step in communication (someone has to listen while the other talks). Ask him why he wants to leave. Ask him if there's anything you're doing that is chasing him away.
After listening to his complaints, you'll have to be honest with yourself first and then to him as to rather or not you are able to make the changes he is complaining about. If you agree to make the changes, then he has the right to expect them of you. But if you're not able make the changes or just don't want to, then you'll have to be okay with him leaving.
Just don't make changes to keep him, make them because you agree that you need to make the changes. You can't make someone stay if they really want to leave. And I don't think you want someone to stay with you out of pity either.
Work it out and let me know what you have decided to do.
2006-11-27 14:55:30 · answer #3 · answered by Tired of being Mr. Nice 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you want to change, start by getting a halfway decent education. Communication is the key to a relationship and you write and spell like a first grade student.
2006-11-27 14:54:06 · answer #4 · answered by Dovahkiin 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think u should sit down and write on a paper why u love him and why u dont like him and see what over powers and i bet u will find that the love side will over power the thing u dont like about him and then u need to talk to him and tell him that how much u love him and and that he needs to give u one more chance and tell him everything even your thoughts and i bet u will work things out
hold your head up and good luck
2006-11-27 14:51:59 · answer #5 · answered by lovergirl24oh 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first thing I would recommend for you is to cry out to the Lord and invite him into your life. Thank him for helping you to realize that you were wrong and ask for guidance in your thoughts, walk, and talk.....In Jesus name, Amen. You have to be sincere about this. Then watch God work in your life.
2006-11-27 14:51:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
try doing something that ya'll had really liked to do at the begginig of the relationship...sit down and have an heart to heart conversation with him tell him how you feelin ...tell him lets REALLY work on it and try to forget the pass
2006-11-27 14:49:01 · answer #7 · answered by Nat 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He really wants to end this relationship because he can't understand what you are talking about.
2006-11-27 14:51:05 · answer #8 · answered by Cymbaline 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
******' A, your making my head hurt with this ghetto slang. If you talk like you write, I'd dump you too, Christ!
2006-11-27 14:47:47 · answer #9 · answered by TheOneVersion3.0 2 · 5⤊ 0⤋