I have a long time friend, who constantly and intentionally falls "in love" with men who are openly gay, or in the most recent case "privately gay" to other people but not her (he uses her to take home to families). I meet most of these guys who she adores, who are great, smart and fun men, BUT... they dont have an interest in a romantic relationship with her for obvious reasons.
The recent one uses her to take home to his family, as well as uses her for money. He invites his male "Friend" over to stay at her apartment (the two guys live on the other side of the country).
I'm tired of it... do you think she should get counselling? How do I convince her, that the reason she hasn't had a boyfriend, is because she's too scared to date someone who's straight? She's 25 and never been in a relationship. She's really tall, kind of chubby and awkward. How can I help or support her? (without freaking out on her and this abuse).
2006-11-27 14:36:15 · 5 answers · asked by rocksnobb 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
you can get her a copy of the movie 'the object of my affection' (jennifer aniston).
2006-11-27 14:43:41 · answer #1 · answered by Bubuchachum 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a serious problem! I have this problem. Hanging out with my gay friends does keep me from having a real intimate relationship. I have a friend that is gay and I think if he wasn't gay I would be set and I wouldn't have to search no more. That's probably how she thinks. You need to remind her that he's gay over and over. That's what I do, I have to remind myself over and over. Although it happens, anyone can fall in love with anyone, gay or straight. But if he uses her etc...she will face reality on her own when she doesn't receive affection back and she will love, loose and learn in this situation. One thing you can do since you mentioned she's chubby...be a friend and go to the gym together, help her watch what she eats, do active things together, that will boost her self-esteem to desire a true relationship. Trust me she knows it's not a real relationship, it's just that he's probably all she's got and the only love she's getting is from him (in the suckiest way). Good Luck! Hope I helped out a little.
2006-11-27 22:57:09 · answer #2 · answered by lynn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't do anything except try talking her into seeing a psychiatrist. She does it because she's afraid of being in a real relationship and this is a way of keeping the door open. If a man loved her back she'd probably panic so badly trying to get away that she'd sabotage it anyway.
2006-11-27 22:48:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
For starters try to introduce her to a straight man. i fell for a gay guy but he wasn't openly gay. Only me and his best friend know. The best friend told me and i'm not supposed to know!! Even if he tells me i cant tel him i already knew!
2006-11-27 22:39:20 · answer #4 · answered by Louise N 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok .. she's seriously screwed up ..
She REALLY needs to get counseling..
it's not normal to fall in love constantly with people who obviously won't return the feelings back..
unless she's one of these weirdoes who think they can turn gay people "back"
2006-11-28 22:26:47 · answer #5 · answered by MapDark 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋